"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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flirt or a subtle move?

LittleBigOne

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Since a few months i have a new colleague and she is a pretty good looking girl to me with Oriental roots. We work seperated in the same building but it happens we chat up during a break or so.
It became clear during a chat we both like cooking and a few days later she gives me recipes (while i didn't asked for them). Last week she asked me if i already tried one of her recipes and then she said 'i expect an invitation from you to come over for diner'. I responded by sure, i will invite you soon but let me practice a bit first.' What do you think, just a flirt or a smart/subtle move from her? Is this a way from her to show interest?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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perseverance

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She's interested in you.

A girl doesn't ask for an invitation to your pad for "dinner" if she isn't interested in you.
 

LittleBigOne

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As far as i know she is semi oriental. She is a not traditional looking oriental girl and she is rather tall (taller then me but i am relative short) and is playing basketball on a high level.
Some extra info, she is having a boyfriend and i have a girlfriend. Does it make the situation different you think?
 
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perseverance

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LittleBigOne said:
Some extra info, she is having a boyfriend and i have a girlfriend. Does it make the situation different you think?
As someone who believes in being faithful to your partner, I would steer clear, but many a man would do the total opposite, so it's down to you.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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SgtSplacker

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If she's a major upgrade invite her over. If it gets close to sex, tell her you have a girl and dramatically pull away kinda like drama squirrel. Leave your girl and go to girlfriend release 2.0. Enjoy your good cooking, gratz man
 

ArcBound

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LittleBigOne said:
Since a few months i have a new colleague and she is a pretty good looking girl to me with Oriental roots. We work seperated in the same building but it happens we chat up during a break or so.
It became clear during a chat we both like cooking and a few days later she gives me recipes (while i didn't asked for them). Last week she asked me if i already tried one of her recipes and then she said 'i expect an invitation from you to come over for diner'. I responded by sure, i will invite you soon but let me practice a bit first.' What do you think, just a flirt or a smart/subtle move from her? Is this a way from her to show interest?
Next time she brings up that dinner invitation tell her to come over and show you how the recipe is done, get her to make her dinner and make moves on her.

At the very least....you have dinner made for you :D

As for your situation you have to play it by ear...she has a boyfriend which could mean she's just friendly. However if she comes over to your place alone and you guys talk about sex and other things the I think it's game on.
 

garruk

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does she know you have a girlfriend? i think thats relatively important.

if she knows your in a relationship, i think she might just want more guy friends who her boyfriend wont object to her hanging out with.
 

LittleBigOne

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Thanks for the responses,

We know from eachother that we are in a relationship. My conclusion after your help: She might be (slightly) attracted to me but, just like me, she is not gonna give up her boyfriend. But she is a girl to keep in mind and might be an option in the future. In the meanwhile i will continue making fun with her, busting her balls and blame her for everything that goes wrong and take a good look in how she responds to me.

Let´s make this thread title different:

Give one example of how a girl made clear she is or was attracted to you.
 
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perseverance

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This really hot girl said to me "Are you going to Y's party on Friday night" and I said "Maybe, I am not sure, I might be going to a club with a few friends" and she said "Well I'm only going to Y's party, if you're going". Low and behold, I got with her at the party.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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LittleBigOne

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perseverance said:
This really hot girl said to me "Are you going to Y's party on Friday night" and I said "Maybe, I am not sure, I might be going to a club with a few friends" and she said "Well I'm only going to Y's party, if you're going". Low and behold, I got with her at the party.
Cool! Well, that´s a great example. Please write this one down in my new thread please. And thanks for your response!
 
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