"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
First Thread on SS - Break Up Last Night
- Thread starter MT93
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
Full throttle ahead. You know what to do.
greatsnake
Master Don Juan
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- Apr 19, 2017
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Yeah agreed,
I genuinely think she may have tried, but something forced is never good, like the guys have said previously if it was real and her feelings for me were that intense, she would never have acted the way she did in fear of losing me.
I think it was a case of she really tried to want it but it was too forced.
I also believe she will feel a sense of relief now that its over and that's the hard part to understand.
My problem with this is that she acted and spoke like it was....(telling me she loved me, so lucky, doesn't deserve me, girls would kill for someone like me, never letting me go again, this time shes ready, blah blah blah)
S*it the day we broke up we went dutch and booked a trip to Barcelona ffs?
So backwards....
Why not just be real?
My main focus now is ensuring this doesn't happen to me EVER again. Seriously, I really want to improve on this aspect of my life, hence why I'm here
I want to become someone people are scared to lose.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
greatsnake
Master Don Juan
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- Apr 19, 2017
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become the prize.
greatsnake
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 19, 2017
- Messages
- 648
- Reaction score
- 313
- Age
- 37
how do you become the prize? become a person that adds to people's lives, put yourself first, spin plates, go from having a scarcity mentality to abundance mentality.
I thought I did add something to peoples lives. That's the problem greatsnake...
Went to a wedding yesterday with some friends from my team, there take on it is that I'm too superficial and rather than go for someone with looks I need to start thinking outside the box??????
Kinda p*ssed me off slightly as it makes me sound very shallow..
My mentality has always been, I go for someone because when I see them, I know straight away 'I want you'
That was the case with this chick, and the last 6 or 7...
Hahaha
Right kind of attitude.
It's safe to bet that your superiors at the office knows what's going on and are actually seeing how you handle yourself - I do this, I'm pretty sure yours would and I'm sure so will you....one day.
You'll do fine with this mindset.
Everyone here has given excellent advice.
Soldier on brother.
More than likely, the first time we split I took it much harder and they did have a chat with me with regards to it affecting my performance, especially as I had just moved into the management role.
This time I ensured that wasn't the case, my job is one of my biggest achievements and something I'm incredibly proud of and she doesn't deserve to taint that for me...
Thank you for the support brother, I'm giving it my best, very much ups and downs at the moment.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Often I've said this to my own management staff, applies towards everything, I hope this helps you as it does for me;
Success = Ur core values(imparted by parents etc) + How u think + How u do things.
When you fail in anything, it always boils down towards "how u think".
Most men will keep on changing " How they do things" and not knowing why they keep on failing. What they were lacking was knowledge - how they think.
Just by being on this forum, your knowledge has grown, and in turn this will contribute towards "how u do things", it's more then likely you'll notice small successes along the way.
Keep at it.
Of course, I really am determined to change- looking over certain things and it now makes sense why majority of my previous RS ended up in smoke...
Continuing to do the same things, I will always receive the same results.
That's why I'm here, because I want to learn and I want to improve as a man.
My plan now is to revert back to myself, focus on health, focus on career and finances, appearance etc
If I manage to smash some plates on the way, fantastic, but it is not a primary objective currently....
It just happens to be such a shame that it didn't work out with this bish, because I really thought this was it.
Mike
Made a dreaded mistake yesterday fellas, went out to watch the game, ended up getting mortally wasted.
Bumped into one of my best friends and his Mrs (we used to go out as a 4 now and again after I introduced my ex to the group)
After a little bit of chit chat, my friends girl started talking to me about the ex, how she knew i shouldn't have trusted her, seen her texting lads etc (really p*ssed me off aswell cause id had a few sherberts) and telling me how she had been messaging saying they should all get together and go out, asking if my best friend can go and drop her off somewhere, like wtf?
I reacted, I bit. And I feel such a fool.
I text her
Me - "Can you please stop trying to organise things with my friend group, and asking for favours off my mates, sort ya own s*it out with your own people"
Her - Ok Hun
Me - D*ckhead
Her - Grow up
I'm expecting a roasting here from u guys, and deservedly so... Never have I cracked before and text.
Feeling very very stupid.
Have a lot more anger for this b*tch this time round though.
resilient
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2005
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If it hurt when your friends brought her up you could have changed the subject or politely ask them not to talk about her.
You broke no contact to text her voicing your complaint made you look immature and you called her names. Do better. Be the bigger man and let all the hurt and rejection go. No matter how much she hurt you, you should still be a gentleman and leave her alone while you’re angry with her.
Just walk away.
Do something else constructive with your time to think and talk about her less.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I know man, I think the drink had an influence on it aswell to be honest, not blaming it on that though, it is solely my fault.
Really hacked off with myself.
btownbuck2012
Master Don Juan
Ugh, what a f*cking kunt.
btownbuck2012
Master Don Juan
This type of behavior is the biggest red flag I can think of when vetting other people, both men and women, to bring into your life. Absolutely toxic.
btownbuck2012
Master Don Juan
This is the hardest thing I’ve had to wrap my head around too. I still struggle with it tbh. It’s utterly dumbfounding how f*cked up people conduct themselves.
mrgoodstuff
Master Don Juan
So you picked for raw physical attraction and didn't get to know them.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.