First dates don't really mean much

[Uncharted]

I'm getting confused during my first dates and I'm not sure how to improve. Last five girls I went on first dates with:

1. We were all over each other in the parking lot after getting drinks. She had to go but I told her I'd text her. Never heard back from her.

2. Had a great time together she was all over me in the bar and then again outside. Kept making references to when she was going to see me again. Never heard back from her after a text a day or two later.

3. Girl seemed kind of into me but was hesitant. Kissed in the parking lot near her car. 2nd date BJ 3rd date sex.

4. Girl seemed standoffish physically all night. We had a fun conversation over drinks but it seemed more like friends. I tried to kiss her and she turned her head. I never followed up. A week or two later she texted me asking to hang out. I went to her apartment and banged her.

5. We didn't seem to get along because our personalities clashed but I figured might as well just go for this anyway. Went in for kiss we ended up banging in her back seat on the first date. After that she would text me and reply but never wanted to meet up.

Maybe I'm escalating too quickly and they are feeling like I just want to bang and drop them?

 

[wifehunter]

I imagine, a lot of guys on this board would say "next her" .... she didn't pass the kiss test. It also depends on what you want. It sounds like a fwb situation.

 

[Slash Dolo]

Are you sending the first text after dates? If so that may be your problem. I would never send a text after a date (even if we banged) until I got one from her first unless it's at least a week later.

In general though we can read articles on this site and think we have everything down and still be thrown a curveball because there is an exception to every rule and no woman (or man) is exactly like another. Case in point, your experiences here.

It seems where you're losing out is the texting portion. The in-person stuff usually always goes well for me too; but texting is a LOT more difficult because men get over with women based on personality, game, body language, tone of voice; things that are hard or impossible to display in text. If I can give you a text tip, try to create intrigue by sending a text like "So I have a question" and then don't follow up til hours, or a day later. It doesn't really matter the question, it could be asking her out again or her opinion on a shirt you're ordering; what matters is you're creating intrigue and getting her mind wondering about what it is you could be wanting to ask, and then why you aren't asking it in short order. And again, don't text first after dates unless it's about a week later.

 

[dustmuffin]

I have had dates with a good kiss close then nothing. Three first dates this week and a third. I think you just have to try to set up the second date. May work may not. Nothing ventured nothing gained.

But on the other hand i had a date bj in parking lot, second date sex and then no reply to my text. That was about two weeks ago. Sent a text today for grins and got a date saturday. She told me she didnt want it to be just about sex. I ignored and set up the date. She is crazy but good in bed. We will see how this goes.

 

[zinc4]

My relibles one pretty much always tend to be first date lays or last back to my place or hers. If not, I pretty rarely see or ask for a second date.