"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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First Date Set-up Call

the_m@n

Don Juan
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Hey guys.

I got out of a long term relationship and am back in the dating world, however I am a little rusty... I will accept the fact that I was a dummy for getting into a long term relationship and leave it at that.

Anyway, I number closed a cutie I was dancing with at the bar over the weekend and called to set up the first date. Now here is the interesting part:

I called but no answer so I hung up. She calls me back about 40 minutes later (caught me off guard cuz football was on) and I answer her call. I proceeded to set up the first date and I am picking her up at her house this weekend. (Important to know: She got my number when I got hers so she knew it was me that called)

My question is... did I do the right thing here?

I wasn't expecting the call back and I was planning on calling her in a few days. Was I correct in picking up the phone? or did I make some mistake? I am concerned because I want to make sure that I don't repeat the error (if there was one) when I set up more first dates with other women.

Thanks. Still trying to re-learn.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Korrupt

Banned
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Everywhere
the_m@n said:
Hey guys.

I got out of a long term relationship and am back in the dating world, however I am a little rusty... I will accept the fact that I was a dummy for getting into a long term relationship and leave it at that.

Anyway, I number closed a cutie I was dancing with at the bar over the weekend and called to set up the first date. Now here is the interesting part:

I called but no answer so I hung up. She calls me back about 40 minutes later (caught me off guard cuz football was on) and I answer her call. I proceeded to set up the first date and I am picking her up at her house this weekend. (Important to know: She got my number when I got hers so she knew it was me that called)

My question is... did I do the right thing here?

I wasn't expecting the call back and I was planning on calling her in a few days. Was I correct in picking up the phone? or did I make some mistake? I am concerned because I want to make sure that I don't repeat the error (if there was one) when I set up more first dates with other women.

Thanks. Still trying to re-learn.
You're over-analyzing this. You did nothing wrong. You have a date, no need to worry.
 

Thundernuts

Senior Don Juan
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First off ( i know i am setting myself up to get attacked here) but there is nothing wrong with having an actual long term relationship. Some people just think there is.

Sounds like you did everything okay, the date is set. If she cancels give her the benefit of the doubt, if she does it again then next her ass and keep going nothing to it.
 

escaleraroyal

Master Don Juan
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I had the same situation. I called today she didn't pick up and I hung up and she called 10 minutes later 2 times. But I missed the call cause I was driving. Should I call her back the same day or in a few days?
 

the_m@n

Don Juan
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YThanks guys. As far as escalararoyals situation is concerned I would wait. Keep her guessing on when you are going to call. She will be thinking about you and wondering when you are going to call. Will put you in better control I think.
Good luck.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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