"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

First Date in a long time..but might of stuffed at the the end

Hmm

Don Juan
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Hey guys

I had a first date tonight, first one in like a few years...

Anyway it went really really well...talked the whole time, so many funny moments.. she said it was fun and said it wasnt ackward etc at all, bit touchy etc.

Thats all I was aiming for but now im not happy.

But anyway when I dropped her off home we got outta the car and she asked for a hug and then I said do i get a kiss or something like that.. anyway we started kissing and she held my hand but I kinda freaked out since I know im not a good kisser.

She said your very gentle and I said that im not very experienced....then later she said "I might see u again".

So not sure if I ****ed it up...:(
 
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Electro67

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Relax. I don't think you fvcked it up. Being a little nervous and awkward on a date is not a crime. If she's worth your time, she'll see you again.
 

Uncharted

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If you kissed and SHE mentioned something about seeing you again then you're good.

Don't dwell on it, though. Keep talking to other girls and getting their numbers and asking them out. It gets easier the more you do it.
 

MtnMan

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I think you did fine man. And even if you don't see her again, you kissed her on the first date. That is GREAT, and a VERY important step to getting more dates and getting laid more. Kiss closing on every date was the turning point for me to start getting laid.

Just relax and be more confident with the kiss. Kissing is really enjoyable and natural once you just let it happen. Once the kiss is initiated, just got with the flow, feel how it feels and cut it off at a high point. Maybe chat a bit more like nothing ever happened, go for a kiss again, and end on a high note again.

Good work getting the kiss close, you did well.
 

Partizan

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Yup, nice job on the kiss. Next time, though, don't ask if you can kiss her. Just do it.

Also no need to specifically admit you're inexperienced. I'm sure she already picked up on it.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Hmm

Don Juan
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Havent heard from here yet...but she is really busy today.

I want to wait for her to MSG me...what should I say? I want her to know that I know I was a poor kisser...but I dunno what to say.
 

MtnMan

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DO NOT MENTION THE POOR KISSING. Stop thinking about it man, seriously. Never apologize for $hit like that. DO NOT!!! are you listening? DO NOT MENTION THE KISS.

If you want to get together with her, see if you can arrange another date, and proceed with confidence, and go for the kiss again. If she agrees to go out again, she doesn't care about the less-than-stellar kiss.

If she gets flakey (like women usually do), be proud you went for the kiss, and pull back from her and look for other girls.

Pat yourself on the back for kissing her, and stop thinking about the mechanics of it. Kissing is natural if you let yourself relax. Once you get a good session in with her or another girl, you will look back and laugh at this whole situation.

Godspeed.

Also, did I mention NOT TO MENTION THE KISS TO HER????
 

hudpes

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A bit jumpy, are we? You're behaving like a female. You don't apologize, unless you've spilled a drink on her or vomited on her rug, clogged her toilet or scratched her car. Never ever apologize for what you think was inferior or excessive performance on your part. I'm not saying it can't ever work, it might, but are you really feeling that lucky? Besides, the vibe I'm getting is you're obsessing over your own actions, your mind is flooded with self-conscious questions and doubt, so you want to know where you stand and you turn to her for answers. You can't do that. You don't ask a woman if she came, you don't ask her if your **** is big enough for her, you don't apologize for coming before her, you don't ask her if she liked your kiss, you don't ask her if she liked you enough for a second date. Calm down your mind and wait a while.

I don't think you're in a position to be flirty-playful with her anymore, even if you could pull it off, she wouldn't buy the sudden flip. You were being honest, so open up to her, but in good taste, but don't forget to be a man about it. Talk about yourself, but don't whine. You're a rough, strong, stinking lumberjack at a campfire talking to someone he trusts, not a 12 year old boy scared of what the girl might think of him because he hasn't kissed anyone before.
 

No.Danny

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Why are you so worried about being a bad kisser. God if she liked you she won't care that much. But you just had to bring it up? + kissing is more about being natural then technique.
 

Hmm

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I guess its possible she thinks I dont like her....I mean I wasnt very eager with the kissing and I just wanted to get out of there, due to fear of my kissing performance.

I'll just wait, its only been 1 day...
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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No.Danny

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See that's your problem. YOU CARE TOO MUCH.
 

Hmm

Don Juan
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No.Danny said:
See that's your problem. YOU CARE TOO MUCH.
Well yeah you're right...its just the date went SO much better than I expected and she seems like a mature and decent girl and we got on so well. Im not in love or anything...it was just one date..

I just feel like I did perfect until the end
 

Partizan

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DO NOT mention anything to her about being a poor kisser.

Godalmighty.
 

Hmm

Don Juan
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Well good news...she messaged me and thanked me for a good time.. I then said id like to see her again if she wants and she agreed.

So I guess i need to be more confident with the physical stuff next time I see her.
 

wishyo

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imo you are in a very good shape. great that she agreed, dont give her too much attention in the sense of endless texts/calls or talks about emotions, dont be too available. gotta maintain her interest level
and ye, if you want to kiss her or do whatever you want, go with your gut and just do it. the fact that she agreed to kiss right away is great by itself, it is really irrelevant how well you do it:D
the girl i currently date kinda of complained about me leaving too much saliva around her lips (i went straight for a french, she wanted some moron romantic b/s, i guess. you know like in those movies where you start slowly, fvck that:D), nevertheless we kissed few more times and in the end she managed to open her mouth. i am not an expert kisser i guess too, but i dont give really two sh1ts about it
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Hmm

Don Juan
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Well it seems good but she hasnt snap-chat me since the date..where the week leading up the date id get one nearly every day.

I know she had a great time...so I should be happy with that..
 

wishyo

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dont worry about it. You guys already kissed, she clearly has interest in you, don’t overcomplicate it.
Girls do read stuff about dating, they do chat about this all the time with their friends so don’t worry about it as said before, mb she is just busy or doesnt want to look needy too. just ask her out later on this week, i.e. Wednesday or Thursday.
I am actually in the somewhat similar case, waiting for my girl to come back from her 2 week long vacations, we havent got in touch with each other since she left, but I am pretty sure everything is fine between us, will text her probably on Wednesday and ask her out on either Friday or Sunday.
 

Hmm

Don Juan
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Thans Wishyo...yeah she is really busy...I think her weekend is full anyway.

She is going on vacation to Asia in a a couple of weeks.

Just wish I did better when I had the chance..you know..
 

wishyo

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Don’t even bother yourself about it, telling her that you are not a very good kisser obviously not the best piece of information you can give (that probably will give her a hint that you didn’t date much before)
Anyways, I mean if a girl kisses you or touches you, she even told you she might see you soon, she clearly likes you or at least has interest in you. That’s it, period.
Just ask her out in few days, if she REALLY likes you, she will find time to meet you or at least she would propose some other time. Don’t act needy though, in your spare time check out bradd80’s guide along with Anti-Dump posts in DJ Bible, those posts are just amazing, will help you a lot if you want to keep her.
 

Hmm

Don Juan
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Dont worry I was pretty much spot on during the date before the kiss and perfect before and after the date..havent been needy at all.

Just been my myself:)
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

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