First date in 5 years, need ideas...

[Strix]

Hi guys

Long time lurker, first time poster.

I've just come out of a ***** of a divorce, Long story short, I married too young, I acted like a **** and let her walk all over me, she destroyed my confidence, got stucked by someone else and ended up having this guys kid after getting rid of mine.

I know, I know, cut the BS, charge it to the game and all such...

Anyway, the divorce was finalised 2 months ago and I've ended up doing a crapload of charity work for various organisations, and I've met a nice girl through church, not a real knockout, but really sweet and funny. We're due to meet up on saturday and go for a drink.

What I need to know is, how do I convey that I'm interested, without coming across desperate or, as tariq nasheed would put it, thirsty? Its a friends thing we're doing, and I'm wanting to convey that I'm interested, but not come across like a desperate idiot.

So I'm after ideas, links to other threads, articles from the DJB etc, that I can look at to give me some ideas.

Just to highlight my situation, Im not a nice looking guy, which is why I need the help.

Cheers guys

S

 

[Tiguere]

Read the book of pook. Everything is in there. If you have a ? About sonething you read come here and ask us.

 

[SandHawk]

I agree with Tiguere, read the DJ bible and the pook of book. Both have plenty of material on how to convey you're interested in a girl without being pathetic.

 

[Kal0051]

That's your advice to the guy? Read a 300 page book? Yeah, or you could just tell him the answer so he doesn't have to.

lol, my first thought when I read "read the book of pook" was "so he's gonna study a 270 page book by Saturday?". I think the guy's looking for so simple last minute tips to keep from looking like an ass, not a life changing experience, lol.

 

[Kailex]

Anyway, the divorce was finalised 2 months ago and I've ended up doing a crapload of charity work for various organisations, and I've met a nice girl through church, not a real knockout, but really sweet and funny. We're due to meet up on saturday and go for a drink.

S

First piece of advice:

Just because you met her in church and you think she's sweet, don't treat her as such. She's a woman just like any one else and will be receptive towards kino.

Act sexual.

Second piece of advice:

You already got the drink part down, so make sure you definitely establish eye contact and make sure kino HAPPENS. Also, if you are going to a TGIF-type place to have drinks, do NOT sit at the booths/tables. Make sure you go to the bar area, booths/tables are ANTI-KINO and will c0ck-block you in the worst way. You want to make sure that you are next to her, that you can tough her shoulder/arms/hands.

Third piece of advice:

Just relax, don't drink more than her, you don't want to come off as a lush. Just take it easy on your alcohol intake and you should be fine. Yes, it helps to lower inhibitions but take it TOO far and then you'll be a babbling idiot all night.

Fourth piece of advice:

I hope you two picked either her place or yours as a start-up location, that way, you can end the night at either one. It sets the tone.

Fifth piece of advice:

Just relax and be yourself, but don't be a friend. Yes, it's nice to make them laugh, but you have to build sexual attraction as well as comfort and rapport.



I know you're probably a little nervous, it's the first date in 5 years. If anything goes wrong, just take it in stride. This is a learning experience. Just have fun with zero expectations.