"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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First Date - Casual - She wanted to come in my house!

Dingus

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I just got back from a casual date with this great girl I recently met. She's definitely LTR material. Anyway, she picked me up at my house and we went out and had lunch. I was getting great vibes from her the entire time. I didn't pull anything fancy and just tried to play it cool. She started off by gazing at me and told me I was gorgeous. I smiled and said thanks and quickly moved the conversation on to something else. Anyway, she dropped me off back at my house and asked if she could come in and take a look at the place. I told her it was a complete mess, which was the exact truth, and that I'd give her a tour some other time after I had cleaned up the place. I told her I had her number and would give her a call sometime soon so we could go out and play pool (which she told me she was wanting to do). Was this the right move to make? I probably would have invited her in had my place been clean but I remember someone saying that it's often a good idea not to let a gal in your house on the first date.

Did I screw up?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Timster

Don Juan
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I think you did great! You're in control. And, obviously, she digs you, so no worries. You left her wanting more...and more she will get...in time. Clean the place up. Have her over for pizza and a movie...cuddle...;) Have fun!!!
 

DeathDealer

Master Don Juan
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you did fine buddy. seems like she's really into you if she wants to come over to your place. invite her over next time though.
 

TillTheEndOfTime

Master Don Juan
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I agree with the above comments. Why are you worried? You played it cool and are keeping her waiting. You're in control.
 

Dingus

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Thanks for the input guys, it makes a world of difference in my attitude. I guess I was worried because I haven't been on a date in such a long time. Just me being a little paranoid starting out here.

She instant messaged me this evening and wants to hang out. So I guess this is date number 2 for today. I'll let you know how it goes.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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