Lionheart
Master Don Juan
What up SpaceCadets?
It is now 3:26am and sleep is infinitely far away.
First the good stuff....
I have recently declared war on my acne, washing three times a day with soap, water and then clearasil and also having some tetracycline antibiotics in the pipeline, I have also started taking vitamin tablets in an attempt to clear my skin, this appears to be a losing battle, my 50 year old
father still gets spots!
The only plus to this is I guess I'lll never run out of testosterone.
I have also sorted out to a degree my ****ty hair, which is too dark to be fair and too light to be dark, It now looks pretty good with the American
Crew Fibre wax on it, and it spikes quite nicely and is a nice length.
The plan is to go see a top-bollocks stylist in July, and my mother has offered to pay, I obviously need it
I just need some direction with it, once I know what to do, I can start doing it.
My social life has never been better, with me becoming quite the dominant male, I make a lot of te social decisions and usually dominate the conversations, I can't be the alpha male as I am not physically imposing enough, however I can make anyone laugh and seem to have no problem keeping people (male or female) entertained.
At work I have no problem talking to the HB's and my player friend is quite impressed by this, he says it really suprises him the level of rapport I can achieve but ironically not get any further romantically with them.
There is a wonderful HB9.5 called Katie who I get along really well with, she specifically asks me whereabouts I sit, because we get on so well, she is 6ft, blonde, funny and attached
I am not AFC with her and I am NOT her girly pal, we have a laugh and a drink at the end of work with me and another cute gal called Catherine HB 8 / 9.
I am getting paid £400 a month at my job, which is good money for students, as a result I have a lot more money than a lot of my fellow students and am keeping out of debt quite well.
My degree and academic work has never been better, with my getting quite a reputation for excellence in the department of computing, I am also not seen as a geek due to the reputation I have for working hard and playing harder, some people have asked how I do it, chances are depending on the outcome of this year to come, I will walk into a high paying job as an computer animator down in London.
My summer holiday is all worked out, I am working 30hrs for a month and then I am going to take all of July off, where I plan to spend a large amount of time back in Nottingham, reading, animating, going running around the cross country course in the woods, mountain biking and getting a nice sun tan.
I am off the alcohol for a while as it is unneccesary calories and is making me act weird, and I am trying to cut up in preparation for Diesels bulking guide.
-----------------------
Now the not so good....
Today I have been royally ****ed over by quite some magnitude, I have also not managed to get laid for a
very long time, along with several amusing altercations that are making me consider becoming mother****ing celibate.
The French chick, Bénédicte, HB 8 cute, pale skin, brunette / copper hair, SEXY accent (Ok I admit it - something near to being a oneitis.) that I have been laying some game down to at work, has finally over the past 2 weeks been formally introduced to me and I have now been getting to know her a little, We knew each others names and said Hi, but never really talked until the past couple of weeks, I had specifically avoided contact with her until recently as I did not want to end up in the dreaded LJBF zone before I was ready to make a move, I have been on a self-improvement jag for quite sometime, and I was just starting to get my confidence back.
I was talking to her and seemed to get a good response off her, I have found out after talking with her that she is as personable as she is cute, and also appears to be somewhat the artistic type, we were talking about a play being put on at her university, I should have asked her to go but she had to rush off for her friends' birthday before I could suggest it, she seemed real about this, and I can usually tell when people are bull****ting and
she seemed pretty genuine.
However the response I got from her seemed pretty good, I saw some expectation in her eyes when I mentioned the play, I would have asked about when to go, but my friend Jamie interrupted me (not on purpose) and she said she had to leave quickly.
I saw her again and got good rapport with her again, she was with 2 other female mutual friends, and I had the three of em laughing and joking with me, she mentioned that she was going to the local ****-tip called the Piper on Friday night with a load of American friends off her course, I ended up showing some value here as I got 2 phone calls within 30 mins from 2 different groups of friends asking me to come out with them, and I managed to
talk about how busy and interesting my life was! (With subtlety of course!) talking to my player friend and my AFC friend asking if they wanted to come with me, I got my player friend to come telling him about all her cute friends.
The events i am about to mention made me extremely paranoid, the way and order they played out felt SO ****ing uncoincidental.
(I am just being paranoid, but sometime I feel like I'm on the Truman Show!
)
Friday afternoon I had to take the soon to be mentioned digital camera back to university and guess who I run into - Benedicte.
She comes out of her house, which I have walked past THOUSANDS of times on the way to university (without knowing it.), and have only run into her once (today), she appears when we are LESS than three feet away.
Its me and my player friend, he plays the game and does a great job of winging me (he knows I like the girl), it amazes me how he can so easily switch between being the centre of attention and then just blending into the background, as a result I dominate the conversation with her.
I see her with a hikers backpack on, and she is usually slightly snappy and smart, albeite unusual dresser, I joke about I thought she was going to the Himlayas and give her a c+f smile, and then she drops the bombshell...."Not going out tonight now as I'm going to London - to see my boyfriend."
.......Arse.
The way she mentioned her boyfriend instead of just mentioning London and shutting up about it REALLY makes me wonder if she has known all along, my player friend said that she had no idea, as he has his ear to the ground at work, and the only reason I didn't want it to get out was so that I didn't look like a loser afraid to ask her before my self-improvment and the other crap was sorted out.
So that's made me quite angry, I know it's AFC to get oneitis too bad, and I am trying to keep my mind off her.
Then I got a digital camera on loan from university and looked at the pictures, while there is nothing wrong with my
facial features they all go together in a rather strange way, I look good when looking straight in a mirror at 90
degrees, however if the way I look on these photos is the way I normally look then - I am not suprised that I don't get laid.
Just great, huh?
The components of my face are quite good, however the way they go together sucks quite a lot of ****, IF this is right, I think the camera is meant to be notorious for making people look bad, the spherical distortion because of the lens does not help much.
As for the following two c+b's I have only mentioned girls that appeared to have interest in me, there have been a few approaches and a few girls I ain't interested in, I think I am gonna have to play the numbers game.
Crash and Burn II : I met a exquisitely cute and personable brunette chemistry student in a local nightclub, we had good rapport again and I managed to keep the conversation flowing and keep it funny, then halfway through the convo she mentions that she is attached in the most
unsubtle way I have heard for quite a long time, I am good at concealing my intentions, I am hard to see through and complex as a person, BUT IT APPEARS THAT THE 'I WANT TO SCREW YOU' APPEARS IN BIG ****ING NEON LETTERS ON MY FOREHEAD
(even when it's not actually there.)
Crash and Burn III : Met another cute brunette (my type as you have prob. guessed.) in local pub, friends had chatted her and her blonde friend up before I got there, nice light convo, after the previous two c+b, decided to be nice and friendly, keep it light with no pressure, brunette said that she was going to the nightclub after the pub, saw brunette in club, opened with "Fancy seeing you here!
", as had talked previously about where she was gonna be going so was a joke.
Talked a little, and then she started to look REALLY uncomfortable, and said "I'm...err....erm just going...to go to the bar.", I said "Yeah, erm..ok then." totally suprised at how she freaked out and just left.
Tried to stay friendly and light all three times, yet the women still decided they wouldn't touch me with a bargepole.
Ironically for all my intellect, practise and achievements, despite the fact I get told that I am a great deal more confident and masculine than my player friends, for all my convo skills and DJ practise and the fact I don't get played or used now - I STILL HAVE THE WORD LOSER IMPRINTED ACROSS MY FOREHEAD IN SPECIAL LETTERS ONLY WOMEN CAN SEE.
I am gonna become a SERIOUS misogynist at this rate, I can only take so much ****.
...I guess I'm just ugly
It is now 3:26am and sleep is infinitely far away.
First the good stuff....
I have recently declared war on my acne, washing three times a day with soap, water and then clearasil and also having some tetracycline antibiotics in the pipeline, I have also started taking vitamin tablets in an attempt to clear my skin, this appears to be a losing battle, my 50 year old
father still gets spots!
The only plus to this is I guess I'lll never run out of testosterone.
I have also sorted out to a degree my ****ty hair, which is too dark to be fair and too light to be dark, It now looks pretty good with the American
Crew Fibre wax on it, and it spikes quite nicely and is a nice length.
The plan is to go see a top-bollocks stylist in July, and my mother has offered to pay, I obviously need it
I just need some direction with it, once I know what to do, I can start doing it.
My social life has never been better, with me becoming quite the dominant male, I make a lot of te social decisions and usually dominate the conversations, I can't be the alpha male as I am not physically imposing enough, however I can make anyone laugh and seem to have no problem keeping people (male or female) entertained.
At work I have no problem talking to the HB's and my player friend is quite impressed by this, he says it really suprises him the level of rapport I can achieve but ironically not get any further romantically with them.
There is a wonderful HB9.5 called Katie who I get along really well with, she specifically asks me whereabouts I sit, because we get on so well, she is 6ft, blonde, funny and attached
I am not AFC with her and I am NOT her girly pal, we have a laugh and a drink at the end of work with me and another cute gal called Catherine HB 8 / 9.
I am getting paid £400 a month at my job, which is good money for students, as a result I have a lot more money than a lot of my fellow students and am keeping out of debt quite well.
My degree and academic work has never been better, with my getting quite a reputation for excellence in the department of computing, I am also not seen as a geek due to the reputation I have for working hard and playing harder, some people have asked how I do it, chances are depending on the outcome of this year to come, I will walk into a high paying job as an computer animator down in London.
My summer holiday is all worked out, I am working 30hrs for a month and then I am going to take all of July off, where I plan to spend a large amount of time back in Nottingham, reading, animating, going running around the cross country course in the woods, mountain biking and getting a nice sun tan.
I am off the alcohol for a while as it is unneccesary calories and is making me act weird, and I am trying to cut up in preparation for Diesels bulking guide.
-----------------------
Now the not so good....
Today I have been royally ****ed over by quite some magnitude, I have also not managed to get laid for a
very long time, along with several amusing altercations that are making me consider becoming mother****ing celibate.
The French chick, Bénédicte, HB 8 cute, pale skin, brunette / copper hair, SEXY accent (Ok I admit it - something near to being a oneitis.) that I have been laying some game down to at work, has finally over the past 2 weeks been formally introduced to me and I have now been getting to know her a little, We knew each others names and said Hi, but never really talked until the past couple of weeks, I had specifically avoided contact with her until recently as I did not want to end up in the dreaded LJBF zone before I was ready to make a move, I have been on a self-improvement jag for quite sometime, and I was just starting to get my confidence back.
I was talking to her and seemed to get a good response off her, I have found out after talking with her that she is as personable as she is cute, and also appears to be somewhat the artistic type, we were talking about a play being put on at her university, I should have asked her to go but she had to rush off for her friends' birthday before I could suggest it, she seemed real about this, and I can usually tell when people are bull****ting and
she seemed pretty genuine.
However the response I got from her seemed pretty good, I saw some expectation in her eyes when I mentioned the play, I would have asked about when to go, but my friend Jamie interrupted me (not on purpose) and she said she had to leave quickly.
I saw her again and got good rapport with her again, she was with 2 other female mutual friends, and I had the three of em laughing and joking with me, she mentioned that she was going to the local ****-tip called the Piper on Friday night with a load of American friends off her course, I ended up showing some value here as I got 2 phone calls within 30 mins from 2 different groups of friends asking me to come out with them, and I managed to
talk about how busy and interesting my life was! (With subtlety of course!) talking to my player friend and my AFC friend asking if they wanted to come with me, I got my player friend to come telling him about all her cute friends.
The events i am about to mention made me extremely paranoid, the way and order they played out felt SO ****ing uncoincidental.
(I am just being paranoid, but sometime I feel like I'm on the Truman Show!
Friday afternoon I had to take the soon to be mentioned digital camera back to university and guess who I run into - Benedicte.
She comes out of her house, which I have walked past THOUSANDS of times on the way to university (without knowing it.), and have only run into her once (today), she appears when we are LESS than three feet away.
Its me and my player friend, he plays the game and does a great job of winging me (he knows I like the girl), it amazes me how he can so easily switch between being the centre of attention and then just blending into the background, as a result I dominate the conversation with her.
I see her with a hikers backpack on, and she is usually slightly snappy and smart, albeite unusual dresser, I joke about I thought she was going to the Himlayas and give her a c+f smile, and then she drops the bombshell...."Not going out tonight now as I'm going to London - to see my boyfriend."
.......Arse.
The way she mentioned her boyfriend instead of just mentioning London and shutting up about it REALLY makes me wonder if she has known all along, my player friend said that she had no idea, as he has his ear to the ground at work, and the only reason I didn't want it to get out was so that I didn't look like a loser afraid to ask her before my self-improvment and the other crap was sorted out.
So that's made me quite angry, I know it's AFC to get oneitis too bad, and I am trying to keep my mind off her.
Then I got a digital camera on loan from university and looked at the pictures, while there is nothing wrong with my
facial features they all go together in a rather strange way, I look good when looking straight in a mirror at 90
degrees, however if the way I look on these photos is the way I normally look then - I am not suprised that I don't get laid.
Just great, huh?
The components of my face are quite good, however the way they go together sucks quite a lot of ****, IF this is right, I think the camera is meant to be notorious for making people look bad, the spherical distortion because of the lens does not help much.
As for the following two c+b's I have only mentioned girls that appeared to have interest in me, there have been a few approaches and a few girls I ain't interested in, I think I am gonna have to play the numbers game.
Crash and Burn II : I met a exquisitely cute and personable brunette chemistry student in a local nightclub, we had good rapport again and I managed to keep the conversation flowing and keep it funny, then halfway through the convo she mentions that she is attached in the most
unsubtle way I have heard for quite a long time, I am good at concealing my intentions, I am hard to see through and complex as a person, BUT IT APPEARS THAT THE 'I WANT TO SCREW YOU' APPEARS IN BIG ****ING NEON LETTERS ON MY FOREHEAD
(even when it's not actually there.)
Crash and Burn III : Met another cute brunette (my type as you have prob. guessed.) in local pub, friends had chatted her and her blonde friend up before I got there, nice light convo, after the previous two c+b, decided to be nice and friendly, keep it light with no pressure, brunette said that she was going to the nightclub after the pub, saw brunette in club, opened with "Fancy seeing you here!
Talked a little, and then she started to look REALLY uncomfortable, and said "I'm...err....erm just going...to go to the bar.", I said "Yeah, erm..ok then." totally suprised at how she freaked out and just left.
Tried to stay friendly and light all three times, yet the women still decided they wouldn't touch me with a bargepole.
Ironically for all my intellect, practise and achievements, despite the fact I get told that I am a great deal more confident and masculine than my player friends, for all my convo skills and DJ practise and the fact I don't get played or used now - I STILL HAVE THE WORD LOSER IMPRINTED ACROSS MY FOREHEAD IN SPECIAL LETTERS ONLY WOMEN CAN SEE.
I am gonna become a SERIOUS misogynist at this rate, I can only take so much ****.
...I guess I'm just ugly
