"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Field Report: Walk Before You Run

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I am at club recently. About to take a piss; I see two cute girls on the way. I approach with jokey-****y approach: "So, this where the party spot is in the club. What's up girls?" They're both fun and friendly. One is out at club for first time. Her friend hugs me almost immediately. We talk for a while, drink a bit, and start dancing. I've kissed the cuter of the two on the cheek at some point. She even says, after I say something mildly complementary or witty, "I love you."

Anyway, it gets interesting. They start making a man sandwhich out of me on the floor. I'm grabbing both at different points. Then I decide to go for broke. One of the girls--not the one I've kissed--is behind me. I decide to straight up grab her cooch while we're dancing. Well, from then on the night didn't go well. She cooled off and kind of talked her friend into leaving, more or less sneaking out.

I made two mistakes. Cute girl that "loves me" offered me her number at one point unsolicited. I said let me get it later when we're done dancing. I did not follow up, and her friend dragged her out before I got it. Lesson learned: when you've made the sale, STFU. No good reason not to take the number then and there.

Second lesson, nothing wrong with KINO--which was going well--but don't overdo it. Even if she's feeling randy, she doesn't want to be disrespected or made to feel like a ho. Better not to grab the pooter until it's really clear that you can, and the best proof of this is a lengthy kiss.

Anyway, it was fun while it lasted, but you guys are making me TOO CONFIDENT sometimes; I need to remember common sense. :eek:
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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ExploringOne

Don Juan
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Feb 12, 2007
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Common sense....

That, plus waiting until you're making out in a dark corner...before you start to finger her...

btw, best way to get a phone number, ask her "call me now", give her yours...fast...easy...no mistakes store it later...
 

wayword

Master Don Juan
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Amazing the confidence this site gives, huh?

Well, at least you know your boundaries now. The balance is in being assertive and showing confidence, without being overly aggressive and showing neediness. And in showing enough indifference to not be needy, but enough interest to show attainability.

As far as cooter grabs...you generally want to slide in from the back to decrease resistance.
 
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