You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
What good will that do? If she was really interested, then she wouldn't have taken my gesture that literal and excuse herself out of it. I don't have a 'confidence level' to entertain women being interested in me, so if I ask someone out, that's really taking a big risky step that's out of character since it's assumed they are not interested, so I wont have to deal with anything if someone were to really call my bluff.619joe said:
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Now if this particular teller was overly friendly, and slightly flirtatious while she was doing the transaction, and you ask her out, thats one thing. But asking her out simply because you are attracted? Bonehead move.Luke Skywalker said:
Luke Skywalker said:
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Was it the rainbow? I sold them for a stint during University. They cleaned a frat house real well lol.Bible_Belt said:
This is insane advice for a board that's dedicated to scoring hot babes. The seduction industry would go bankrupt overnight if that was the case and this whole place would be a waste of time if what you are saying is correct -- because it's like saying, women have all the choice and there is nothing that anyone can do about it rather than settle for anyone who chooses you, and if you are lucky, you may be attracted to them too, if not then that's too bad, because you are left with the rotten choice of being involuntary celibate or being with someone you don't want.JackPrescott said:
Or, you could come across as Lounge Lizard Larry. Wear some gold chains, some Brut cologne, and slick your hair back with hair oil. Wear a dress shirt, unbuttoned to the navel, and tight pants. Call every attractive woman "babe" and ask for her phone number before getting her name.Luke Skywalker said:
Like others said, bravo to you for at least going for it. What I find really odd though, is that you find it easier to put the "cart before the horse". Most guys are ok with rapport phase in a situation like this, since it's someone you are going to be talking with anyway. The average guy, however, would find the actual asking for the date part to be much harder.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Well it seems to be a fundamental principle here that if you start cold approaching, or even just saying 'hi' to attractive random strangers, then you start changing your vibe and you become more fluid in interactions (i.e. not seeing each interaction as a big make it or break it deal, being more socially out there rather than inside your head, etc....), and then within that state, you may notice more signals, or women may actually intitiate with you.JackPrescott said:
LMAO... never heard that one before. I like it, I am going to incorporate that one into my lingo.
I completely agree with you, Luke. Many people who have approach anxiety, if they look closely, will probably realize it isn't just with women (though it's likely at it's worst here). I say flirt and strike up conversations with everyone.. Tellers, cashiers, passers-by, people next to me on exercise machines at the gym. And mind you, I have to talk a lot of a living and do real life cold cold-calling to businesses, so it's not like this stuff is exactly new to me. But since I have been making more of an effort lately, I have already noticed myself getting better at it.
No, but I bought a fleshlight instead. However, I keep getting limp most of the time when using it since I'm used to my hands, so it takes time getting used to. Not sure how I'd do with a real woman.krazyboy99 said:
In the animal Kingdom, my Animal Spirit-Guide, the Puff Adder does not bother to hunt his prey. He is lazy. He loves to lie all day on hot rocks and relax. He snoozes and when it gets too hot, he retreats into a hole, or under some rocks, or into a hollow tree trunk, until it cools down a bit. He is so cool, that he doesnt need to hunt, the food comes to him. He lies deathly still, but ready to strike at any given moment. A small rodent does not even notice him, so still and well camoflauged is he. Until it gets too close. The strike of the Puff Adder is so powerful, that sometimes it kills the animal without a drop of venom used, but the venom is among the deadliest in all of Africa, and Arabia. He feeds and goes back on the rock to sunbathe.Luke Skywalker said:
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.