Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Field Report#11 : Date with girl walking around campus

Ryan

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1) The Girl

  • 19 year old ---> Young way I like em
  • Type-->> broke af in hairdressing school, kinda dumb, from a broken family.
  • Looks: 5 ( I know I take what I can get ;) , slightly chubby.

2) How we met

  • Matched on Tinder on Thursday ...then I escalated to text (I think its better than Whatsapp, since on WA ppl can see when you are online)...didnt even expect a date tonight, so it was like a random date---> I asked what she was doing, she replied "nothing" (just at home sleeping and playing xbox), just bought a car lets go for a ride, ill pick you up at 8. I didn't expect her to say yes, but she actually did , and texted me her address where I could pick her up
  • Told her I would be going to lcbo, what does she like to drink? She says "she doesnt drink" (dad is an alkie)
3) The date

  • I show up 30min late (8h30), black biker jacket, cologne and beer ( I figured she was the slutty type b/c of the dyed purple hair). I notice she is not as attractive as in her pic. While we are driving to campus -->> She is laughing at all my jokes, we make small talk.
  • We walk around campus, I try to go a secluded area to have my beer, we find these tables in a secluded area, I open my beer, I ask about her tattoo, small talk, KINO: asked her if I can take a look at her ring, and held her hands for a bit, then I suggested to keep walking around
  • I take her to an area in the back, we sit down, chat some more, played the secrets game ( read it in some thread not sure if it was on sosuave or not, you ask a question the person has to tell the truth):
HER: How many girls you had a relationship with?
ME: Four, what about you?
HER: Two , but both long term
ME: Have you ever kissed a girl?
HER: Yes, have you ever kissed a guy?
ME: Fk NO! (she laughed), ok maybe I shouldnt ask this, but favourite position? I can tell doggystyle?
Her: Yes it is, Yours
ME: Her on top
  • put my arm around her (in my head I am thinking how to segue into a kiss), I notice she keeps looking at her phone. Then I am like can I see your eyes for a bit, she smiles, I did triangular gaze and then kissed her. She ended the kiss.
  • WE chat some more, she mentions that she uses her hands a lot to cut hair, I comment, oh you must be really good with your hands then, she bursts out laughing "Oh I get the reference" (DTF?) , I kiss her again, she always ends the kiss first, I'm rubbing her waist with my other hand . She complains my hands are cold, so I say " I know a way to warm them up", so I slap her ass, she laughs (DTF!)
  • Then she mentions she is tired, and asks if we can go in 20 min, I'm like sure. We walk around "lost" trying to figure out how to get out (I know the way, Im just pretending I dont so I can have more time), I try to ask a few questions from that list marmel posted up, I notice she less engaged in the conversation now. I held her hand for a bit (looks too clingy?)
  • We get to the car, I ask if I can wait a bit before I drive, she is ok, we talk some more, and I am rubbing her neck (she enjoys it) , I go for another kiss, she cuts it short saying she is tired, then asks if I am ok to drive, and how long it usually takes me to sober up (relax it was only 1 beer) I start the car.
  • On the way home we talk, I notice she is less interested in talking than earlier. I ask her what she is doing tommorrow (not to set up a date just conversation), and she says she is going to see her sister, when I drop her off I ask if I can come in to pee because I really need to,l she says "her parents wont let me", then she says "Nice meeting you", and offers me her hand (yeah I know), but I go for a kiss (it was a quick kiss), and she leaves. Time is like 22h40.

4) Aftermath

  • Will see if she blocks me or not, Will attempt to text her again next weekend, or maybe tuesday.


Ok so rate and critique?

Tell us what you would of done different?

Thank you for your time.

@ImTheDoubleGreatest! @Igetit! @3agle3yes @MrWood @dude99 @RangerMIke @marmel75
@logicallefty @VladPatton @sph21
@Alvafe @Mauser96 @Julian @JohnChops @Mazer @Desdinova @sph21 @MidnightCity @deesade @guru1000 @Dash Riprock @ubercat
 
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"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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sph21

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played the secrets game
It feels like you were trying to interrogate her. It feels unnatural to me. When I'm on a date, I always go with something natural & fun to do.

I notice she keeps looking at her phone.
Based on my experiences with girls while I was dating them, it's always a red flag if she focuses more on the phone than the date itself. You should've ended the date faster. What happened next is the proof of it.

Well, at least you're bold enough to post your experiences here.

It's funny how I don't get any alert from your tag.
 

MrWood

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i get the feeling these girls are sensing you only care about running "techniques" on them.
Seems you get good inital responses... but they die before you get the girl back to car/home.

I think that by ignoring the anti-slut moves, they get creeped out... I think the innuendos are way over the top
I comment, oh you must be really good with your hands then,
  • " I know a way to warm them up", so I slap her ass, she laughs (DTF!)
  • Then she mentions she is tired
I ask if I can wait a bit before I drive, she is ok, we talk some more, and I am rubbing her neck (she enjoys it) , I go for another kiss, she cuts it short
she did not enjoy it, or your lame tactic

offensive techniques and tactics are nothing if you cannot read the enemy's state of readiness and react to an ever changing dynamic battlefield

you are playing chess, and your first 5 moves are exactly the same, every-time... checkmate.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Ryan

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i get the feeling these girls are sensing you only care about running "techniques" on them.
Seems you get good inital responses... but they die before you get the girl back to car/home.

I think that by ignoring the anti-slut moves, they get creeped out... I think the innuendos are way over the top



she did not enjoy it, or your lame tactic

offensive techniques and tactics are nothing if you cannot read the enemy's state of readiness and react to an ever changing dynamic battlefield

you are playing chess, and your first 5 moves are exactly the same, every-time... checkmate.
Please elaborate. What were her anti slut moves?

Explain what you would of done different?
 

Murk

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Walking around a campus and drinking one beer with a sober 5/10 with an alcoholic dad, trying to escalate to sex in 2 hours... Just seems a bit of an ask.

You did well by the sound of it up until you started kissing her too long, keep it brief if she cut you off the first time, maybe second time go to kiss, get close and pull back, tease her, look in her eyes, look at her lips, grab her ass and hips when you do kiss. You need to turn this women on not annoy her.

Generally this read better than the other reports you’ve made. I went on a bumble date Friday and I tried to kiss the girl within a couple hours and she recoiled back and wouldn’t let me, I knew she was playing hard to get though because we were already flirting, drinking, touching and shortly after we kissed and couldn’t stop. You are rushing things, it’s less the time frame and more not going through previous kino steps and building enough attraction before you’re trying to the trigger.

If it doesn’t feel at a stage to go for a kiss, then by doing so you just kill the moment and undo your hard work - you can bounce back from this easily by being attractive and having game, but you seem to get nexted and kill the attraction so be very careful when doing this.
 
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lol shes slightly chubby.

ok hypothetically if she was decent looking what would you of done?
Ask her if she wanted to give you head.

Tell her you'll give her $300. That's way more than a normal escort would charge, but sometimes regular girls would need some coaxing.

Tell her you don't have time for games so if she isn't gonna suck your d1ck, then she should just leave. Don't give her a ride home if she doesn't give you head. Make her uber.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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MrWood

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give me 300 and I will masturbate, alone.
 

marmel75

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So you go on a date with an ugly chick with family issues and nothing going for her? Wow...you are really scraping the bottom.of the barrel arent you?
 

sazc

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Walking around a campus and drinking one beer with a sober 5/10 with an alcoholic dad, trying to escalate to sex in 2 hours... Just seems a bit of an ask.
OMG YES!

It's quite possible that you are completely lacking EMPATHY with these females. They can see this and it's turning them off on you.

She told you she doesn't drink BECAUSE sure has an alcoholic father. So what do you do? You grab a six pack intending to drink on your date. The same date you are trying to impress her on. She's already not impressed.

THEN you drink a beer and move in for a kiss. So you are essentially sticking your beer laden tounge into the mouth of a female who has already expressed to you she's not into drinking. No wonder why she always ended the kisses.

The lack of empathy comes from the fact that you set up a date that would make YOU most comfortable, not her most comfortable.

Not to mention, you suggested that you were too buzzed to drive, another trigger for a female with a alcoholic father. If you knew you had to drive why were you drinking at all? Shes thinking.

I get the fact that you have anxiety on dates and feel as if you need a beer or two to calm down. But you can't go into these dates ONLY catering to your own needs, and expect to get the lay, or a second date. As others have said, in most cases, you need to make the woman feel comfortable if there is a chance of sex on the first date, and/or a second date.

The other thing I will mention is, you may want to screen better. Females with drunks as father's probably don't have the best relationship model. Take all information she tells you into account.
 
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Ryan

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Ask her if she wanted to give you head.

Tell her you'll give her $300. That's way more than a normal escort would charge, but sometimes regular girls would need some coaxing.

Tell her you don't have time for games so if she isn't gonna suck your d1ck, then she should just leave. Don't give her a ride home if she doesn't give you head. Make her uber.
seriously?!?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Ryan

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i give you credit for trying. youll make far more progress this way

something doesnt jive with you. cant quite place it but even i can sense it with how you describe things and how you come off. not saying theres something wrong with you, but theres probably a schism somewhere between how you look or talk and how you act.

You’re pushing way too hard in these initial encounters. even interested girls will feel doubtful with this much aggression early on. if youre looking strictly for girls that are looking to bang on first encounters, theres better ways to weed out and go about it.

other than that, you need to just chill and relax on these "Dates" learn to just plant seeds with the women you meet. if youre looking for first time lays, its simply gonna be a nmumbers game. also, you can run perfect game and it wont matter. if a girls not feelin it shes not feelin it. and if youre looking for same night lays, youre gonna have to be much bolder, after deciding its best to just go all in of course.

dont hit on sub par girls either. good looking women rsepond better to being gamed.

this one was def way better than the first one tho.
Thank you for your input.

What is it about me that made you come to this revelation? It has to be somethign that made you say that about my posts, seeing you have neither 1) seen 2) heard me.

How do I plant "seeds"?

I think I am focussed too much on the outcome ---> instead of just enjoying the date
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

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