feeling jealous and angry

[luckless]

Hi, I am new here and found this place while browsing the internet. I guess I am the epitome of what you guys would call an AFC. I feel really depressed and horrible about this girl I am in love with. It is even more horrible that she lives in the apartment right above me. I am in college right now and live off campus. Anyway, there is this beautiful young lady who lives in the apartment above me, and she was really nice and friendly to me from day one. She is easily a 9 or a 10. I have always been kinda nerdy and shy around girls, and most of them I don’t know what to talk about as I am interested in stuff that they are not. However, this beautiful young lady is very intelligent and we talked about all kinds of things together, and even went out for coffee and went bike riding together. I really thought I had found the one, she is everything I always wanted in a soulmate, beautiful and interesting both inside and out.

Here is the horrible part. I invited her out on my birthday, not alone but with me and some other friends and their girlfriends. After we got back I finally got up the courage to tell her how I feel about her and how we were meant to be together. At this point, she told me that I was very sweet and that I am a great guy and a great friend to have. I asked her if she would consider just one date perhaps, and then it got even more heartbreaking. She told me that I was really sweet but that she didn’t feel that way about me, and that she was already seeing someone, and on my birthday! H@#!@$# of a birthday present!

However, it gets worse. We have not really talked much in the week and a half since then, but last night I saw her walk into her apartment with this guy, of course taller and more muscular than I am, your typical redneck, drives and oversized pickup truck with huge tires, that kind of guy. Anyway, I was trying not to think about it but then I heard the bed rocking, and they were both very loud, obviously she was making love to this guy. It upsets me just to think about it again. In this place you cannot help to hear stuff like that and it is horrible, I got knots in my stomach and I felt like either killing myself or this guy! I am worried when she comes back tonight I will have to endure it all over again, it is torture to not only know, but know when the love of your life is with another man. I know you guys will tell me to find another woman, but it is not so easy to do this. Is there anything I can do to win her heart from this guy? I want her so badly, not with this other man!

 

[Jester FPS]

Geez, talk about torture she being right above you and all..

Just read the reading guide, http://www.jbspencer.com/djb/Downloads/readers.htm

It'll help in your transformation which should be fairly easy since you guys weren't actually dating.

"You'll agree if you're anything like me, before I die over pVssy I give up my right knee, loosen up your handcuffs when you come around me, she ain't the only fish swimming in the sea, I whip pVssy don't let pvssy whip me see I'ma tell you the way my papa told me, especially if the broad stuck with me don't keep a caged bird let the mother f*cka free." -Lloyd Banks

 

[luckless]

It is even worse as I have never had sex before. I hate to admit it but I have never even kissed a girl, I have been too shy in the past. I really wanted my first experience to be with her.

 

[backbreaker]

try having that same girl let you play with her private parts, let you kiss her breasts, sleep in the same bed and cuddles under you with nothing but a thong on, and sucks on your fingers, only to tell you that you are the best friend ever

man we have all been there, nothing to be ashamed of..b ut you are ahead of the game by coming here.

Take a step back, read the DJ bible, learn from your mistakes and understand that tomorrow is a new day

 

[luckless]

she didn't do that , but I was dumb enough to fall in love with someone who lives in the apartment above me. i think this is even worse then if you work with the person. This is awful, i need to get out of here, but my lease isn't up for awhile. I don't know what she sees in him, do they actually have anything to talk about or do they just screw all the time!?

 

[TheLazy]

From what you've said so far, it looks like you came on too strong, and caught her off-balance. What you should have done would be to just have gone on more dates (perhaps slowly but steadily increase the kino and romance).

My advice about her bf, seriously, DO NOT give a rat's ass about the guy's appearance/wealth/etc. You have to show to the world that you are worthy of being loved, and to do that you need to love yourself and love your life. It is not important that the redneck guy is taller and muscular than you, because that alone does not make him better than you in any way.

You might want to spend a few hours reading various classic posts in these forums (mainly the bible), it'll help a lot

Good luck!

 

[misterethoughts]

was it really love you speak off?

 

[mrRuckus]

she didn't do that , but I was dumb enough to fall in love with someone who lives in the apartment above me. i think this is even worse then if you work with the person. This is awful, i need to get out of here, but my lease isn't up for awhile. I don't know what she sees in him, do they actually have anything to talk about or do they just screw all the time!?

Please just stop talking and read the bible. You'll thank us later.

 

[Keeper]

try having that same girl let you play with her private parts, let you kiss her breasts, sleep in the same bed and cuddles under you with nothing but a thong on, and sucks on your fingers, only to tell you that you are the best friend ever

Oh man, you crack me up! :crackup:

 

[coder]

You don’t understand women at all. She doesn’t screw him because he is smart and she likes talking to him. She screws him because he makes her FEEL like screwing. You did what every guy does before he understands women. And it is all wrong. You are young. You have time. Read the dj bible. All the crap you have learned from Hollywood doesn’t work. Being rich and good looking doesn’t work. (It does help, but there are lots of rich good looking men that suck with women.) Never tell a woman with words that you like her until you have screwed her at least 10 times. The way to tell a woman you like her is to advance physically. They way to get a woman is to make her think that she is almost, but not quite, good enough for you. This is why negs work on hot women. You still have a chance with this women, but it will be a lot harder than getting a new one because you have already made many mistakes. You need to learn to not be shy. That is a must. They way to do that is to start talking to people you don’t know. Also, examine you body posture and voice tonality. Notice that they match the shy guy. Change your tonality and posture and it will change your mood. Learn to project your voice. Stand with your back straight and your shoulders down and back. Talk to people you don’t know and make eye contact with them. It will do wonders. It’s all in the bible. Not just for women, but for every aspect in your life, become a confident person. You may not believe it now, but you don’t have to remain a shy guy. Become a bold guy.

 

[Jariel]

You should never tell a girl how you feel unless you're in an established relationship and you're sure she feels the same. It sounds like you need to learn a lot, but it is within your reach to change.

This tip should help you understand all your mistakes...

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=100791

 

[luckless]

I found this site searching for tips and techniques that would get rid of this guy and get her back, as silly and remote as that sounds. From what I have been reading, it looks like I have done everything in the book that I am not supposed to do, pretty much the opposite of what a DJ is. It is a start, but words cannot describe how aggravating and depressing it is to live right next to her/them, whatever. I know that it is not just the big jock/neandrathal types who get women. I know a guy at school who is studying to be a doctor and he looks like a younger version of Bill Gates, and he has a hot, intelligent girlfriend. Of course it is almost guaranteed that he will be rich if he is studying to be a doctor. The guy that gives my love interest's her screaming orgasms every night, I don't know what he does.

 

[DJDamage]

The guy that gives my love interest's her screaming orgasms every night, I don't know what he does.

I doesn't matter what he does, he could easily be an ex con picking up your trash in the morning. To a woman it doesn't really matter about the guy but how he makes her feel.

You have also been brainwashed by society to think that there is the "one" and that you should worship women.

I suggest that you read the DJ Bible and open your eyes and don't post anything about your "oneitis" (there is another word you should learn), until you have a slight understanding of what is really going on. By the way don't you think instead of whining and thinking irrational thoughts about moving you should do something more constractive like hitting the gym, building your own muscles instead of looking at another guy build and feeling inadequate?!!!

DJD

 

[WhAcKeD!]

Ah man I remember these days lol.

Sounds exactly like me, hung out with this girl everyday, did pathetic ****, and like 3 weeks after I knew her I confessed my undying love for her (lol). Drove me to big time depression (almost killed myself) and I felt like ****. I turned my life around through help of this site, it really is pretty funny to think if I never found this site I wouldn't be where I am today. I would probably be in the ground somewhere with a tombstone above my head.

We all go through this **** man. It all starts with one girl that we "love," shyt fails so we turn to someone/something for help and guidance. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, survival of the fittest man, that's what it's all about.

 

[Tomatoes]

It is even worse as I have never had sex before. I hate to admit it but I have never even kissed a girl, I have been too shy in the past. I really wanted my first experience to be with her.

Oh dear.....you are AFC. Start at square one. You have it really bad. The world doesnt have cinderella and sleeping beauty in it. You need to get with the real times. I hate to sound harsh but you have alot of work todo. Read the DJ bible then i suggest a boot camp. I also suggest you forget your infacuation with this girl for now. Shes not after nice boys by the sounds of things.

 

[far from average]

The guy that gives my love interest's her screaming orgasms every night, I don't know what he does.

Uh, THAT'S what he does. Gives her screaming orgasms. If he's a big redneck with a pickup truck, I doubt he's actually that great in bed, she just doesn't know any better.

Don't get intimidated. He's not better than you in any way, you are just hamstringing yourself with your mindset. Number one, get this through your head right now: 95% of women suck as people. They do. It makes me sound more misogynistic than I really am, but it's the truth for guys too. Make friends with a group of girls and watch what they do to each other when they're supposedly friends, and you'll start to realize just how full of crap they really are. Once you do that WITHOUT HATING THEM, you will be close to stepping out of the matrix.

Anyway, you need to forget about this one. Realize what a sh*thead she is and move on. Focus on yourself. You are the important one. Not muscular? Lift weights, eat right. Go to t-nation.com, they've got a lot of skinny guys that have gotten swoll.

Feel weak? Take muay thai and/or brazilian jiu jitsu. After a year or so of that you'll be able to take the average redneck and tear him limb from limb if you feel like it.

Really, it's all in your hands. You can make yourself what you want to be. That's incredibly empowering once you accept it.

Oh, and go read the pickup artists' stuff. A core theme is not to sweat girls, and that's what you're doing.

 

[coder]

I know exactly where you are mentally because I was there myself. What you think is reality about women is all lies. First off, women like sex as much or more than men do. Unlike men, they can’t have the appearance of being sluts, so they will go to great lengths to hide when and who they sleep with. Second, most men think just like you do. You think that women are looking for great husband material and if you show them that you can be a provider and will worship them, they will want to sleep with you. This hasn’t seemed to work out, has it? Look back at all your experience and you will see that it hasn’t worked that way at all. In fact, they seem to sleep with guys that are not so nice to them and won’t spend all their time and money on them. No. They want to sleep with men who are SEXY. Not smart. Not rich. Have you ever known a woman that was smoken’ hot, but her life was a total mess? Did you still want to sleep with her anyway? Probably didn’t want to bring her home to meet mom, though.

Now here is the thing. How sexy a woman is depends on her looks and body. How sexy a man is depends more on his behavior. Looks and money are good, but they are icing on the cake. Learn to carry yourself like you have confidence and a purpose in life and you will become much more sexy. Women in their 20’s aren’t looking for a husband, they are looking for a sexy man to screw their brains out. As they approach their 30’s, they will start looking for a beta male to pay for their sh!t and do all the sh!t around the house for them while they plot on how to get away with screwing all the sexy men without their husbands finding out.

One more thing. If you let a woman know you will do her **** and spend money on her, she will withhold sex and just flirt to keep you doing it. If she sleeps with you, you might move on. Besides, why buy the cow if the milk is free?

 

[DJDamage]

First off, women like sex as much or more than men do.

Have to disagree with you there. Men always want to have more sex then women.

 

[Silverback82]

Yeah, I don't think that's true either, I mean look at online personals. There are always like 25,000 "men seeking women" ads and about 2,000 "women seeking men" ads.

that's because the average woman will get more attention from men than the average man will get from women in the real world

but I agree can anybody provide a link that proves women want sex just as much or more than men

testosterone is the hormone that gives us sexual desire and men have tons more

 

[ProDJ26]

Here is the horrible part. I invited her out on my birthday, not alone but with me and some other friends and their girlfriends. After we got back I finally got up the courage to tell her how I feel about her and how we were meant to be together. At this point, she told me that I was very sweet and that I am a great guy and a great friend to have. I asked her if she would consider just one date perhaps, and then it got even more heartbreaking. She told me that I was really sweet but that she didn’t feel that way about me, and that she was already seeing someone, and on my birthday! H@#!@$# of a birthday present!

man who does this sound like....( ME AND EVERY ELSE HERE WHO WILL ADMIT IT! :yes: ) let's face it -- this is how it starts, we meet the 1 , talk to the 1 , fall in loved with the 1:flowers: , ONLY TO HAVE THE 1 TELL US SHE'S NOT INTERESTED THAT WAY:kick: , WANTS TO BE FRIENDS , ETC. Then we sit and wonder.. wut did i do wrong, y does she like ___ and not me?! (feelings of sadness become anger! ) & you have let the woman won. she is using you for her emotinal tampon. (sorry to sound so harsh but it's the true) if she wants the red neck..then who cares! my only advice is to read the DJ Bible and Pook's articles of " Kill that desperation " & learn how to be a man. You can let her continue to control u and send ur mind on and emotional path if u want but I'd get out of there and start all over.

PS: " dude have some self respect, who mean ur gonna let some HB control ur mind? ( yes u a future DJ ):nono: