fear of approaching is back again

[david90]

I thought I was over it but it is back again . Did u guys start out by approaching girls ur not attracted to and work ur way up or did u just jump right into HBs? I jumped right in HBs and I think it is too fast and that is why I relapse.

 

[Synthesize]

Start on girls you find mildly attractive and work your way up.

 

[DiSt0rTi0n_07]

Just gotta realize you have nuthin to lose by asking.

Can't remember where the quote was from but "there's another girl 10ft away."

If you can't jump into the HBs, start where its comfortable.

 

[SheepSter]

Fear is an emotion that is triggered by your own perception of the surrounding reality at a certain time and place. Once you learn to controle that reality, you can control the emotion.

Approaching girls is easy: walk up to them and say hi. They will 99% of the time react in a positive manner. If you got skill #closing will also be no problem. Do alot of approaching and that's what you find out. For losing fear there's a bit more to it.

Fear is only in your own mind, you can approach a 1000 women and still have fear approaching one in particular because your mindset is different. If you got a fear for something the only way to lose that fear is facing it. The fear is in your mind, so there is were you must look. Realising you're letting reality get to you instead of molding the reality around you is a start.

The problem is that you must prove yourself that there really is nothing to fear about, before you believe it. Once you believe it the fear won't be trigged. For some this will be easily done, while others have complex issues to prove wrong before they lose fear.

I think you just need to be *****slapped and let all the average women be for what they are and only concentrate on the HB's. Get in a fight with a 6.3', 200 lbs baldheaded mean looking Hell's Angel and know what fear is. C'mon approaching a HB and you start wetting your pants. While you are having these feminine issues, the real men are fvcking. That's a free reality check for you hope it helps.

 

[david90]

My main insecurity is my look and it's what hold me back from approaching. I give attractive girls attention by saying hi or approaching them but then I think about me and how girls rarely say hi or appraoch me.

U do have a point about what fear really is. Thinking about it, the fear of fighting a huge guy is a lot greater than approaching.

 

[Climax]

SheepSter: Well put.

david90: read what SheepSter said, and also remember, that a chick is a chick, so treat the HB's just like u would treat a normall not SO attractive chick. And set your mind to think that she is LUCKY that u came up to her to speak to her.

Good luck.

 

[Climax]

Originally posted by david90
My main insecurity is my look and it's what hold me back from approaching. I give attractive girls attention by saying hi or approaching them but then I think about me and how girls rarely say hi or appraoch me.

U do have a point about what fear really is. Thinking about it, the fear of fighting a huge guy is a lot greater than approaching.

You need to have confidence man.. if your confidence about YOURSELF is low, then it will show.... dont think about what u look like, just pretend in your head that u are thisceleb and that u dont need them, and that they are lucky that u even came up to them. I have plenty of not so attracktive friends that get chick left right and centre, the reason for this is because they make the chicks enjoy their company, and they are "alfa" males, and they come out as "REAL MEN" which will phsycologically attract nearly any woman to you.