"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Farting in bed

B

BCOMusic

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so im in bed with one of my girls tonight

and i really have to fart the whole night, like a HUGE fart, not even just a regular fart....

we weren't hooking up, but I didn't want to start hooking up cause I was afraid i was going to rip ass like crazy

i ended up leaving because I had to fart so bad and then i just farted like crazy on the walk home :crackup:

P.S, I met this girl a week ago, we hooked up last night, and i wanted to fclose tonight but i just ahd to fart man it was horrible

should i have ripped ass on her? dutch oven hahah

i figured no, but that would be funny ****
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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KarmaSutra

KarmaSutra

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What man has NOT been in this position at one point of his life or another?

What I've done is gotten really into laying the pipe and then letting the fart kind of ease out. If it's a whopper and needs to be blown out then do it. The embarassment you feel is nothing compared to the discomfort holding it in.

Chicks fart too.
 
Bible_Belt

Bible_Belt

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If you fart in front of her, she will start farting in front of you. Do you really want that? Do you really? I had a farting ex. She used to act offended that I didn't want to be around her farting. I would make her leave and take what she called 'fart walks.' I prefer a fart walk policy over a mutual farting policy, but it is up to you.
 
W

wolf116

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KarmaSutra said:
Chicks fart too.
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Not my ex. No one in her whole family have ever herd her fart and she swears she never has.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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L

Lust

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wolf116 said:
Not my ex. No one in her whole family have ever herd her fart and she swears she never has.
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She's a witch!!!

Burn her!
 
C

comic_relief

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excuse yourself to the bathroom

comic_relief
 
E

Effington

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Been there done that man. I was kind of laughing to myself at the time. After a minute I went to the bathroom and did my business.
 
L

Luveno

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wolf116 said:
Not my ex. No one in her whole family have ever herd her fart and she swears she never has.
Click to expand...
This woman must have a very large enterocutaneous fistula. Does she leak crap out of a random unnatural hole?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

J

just so suave

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Yea, girls don't fart or poop.
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True, it says they don't poop in Kevin and Perry Go Large, so it must be right
 
A

aliasguy

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I remember one time this really, really hot girl that i was running around with (seriously, this girl was HOTT -- freakin' centerfold hot) let loose with a big one in her sleep. She mumbled, "sorry," and i gave her a little sh*t about it the next day. She said, "Well, you fart, too." I said, yeah, ok. The whole thing was really cute.

Too bad we didn't go on longer. DAMN, she was hot.

-
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T

thatguyjamalx

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Yeah I had some girl actually fart while she was going down on me, she was that relaxed, I sort of found it endearing LoL...
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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R

Randallpink83

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Charm&Style said:
you couldve told her to put some ear muffs on
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:nono: silent but deadly style?




.....I would have farted with her in the room. But I would have waited til she was giving me head while I did it.... It would have made for a much better post here in the fourms.
 
S

Sexual

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Bible_Belt said:
If you fart in front of her, she will start farting in front of you. Do you really want that? Do you really? I had a farting ex. She used to act offended that I didn't want to be around her farting. I would make her leave and take what she called 'fart walks.' I prefer a fart walk policy over a mutual farting policy, but it is up to you.
Click to expand...
Yeah, same thing. It was one of the reasons I dumped her because I'm a ****, but at least I have a sense of etiquette. Save that nasty crap for marriage when you've got us hooked, ladies.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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