"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Fack me I may have herpes on my tongue (pics included)

Infamous J

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I'm not sure what it is, but it's come and gone a handful of times over the last two years or so. It'll stay there for anywhere from a couple days to a week. Basically it's a whitehead looking thing that appears on the end of my tongue. It's not painful, more annoying and slightly itchy, for some reason biting it lightly with my teeth makes it feel better.

Here's a pic, not my tongue but one I tracked down online:

http://s163.photobucket.com/albums/t296/anonymouse_05/

The one on the right shows best what mine looks like. Anyone know how I could have gotten whatever it is? Could it be something as simple as sharing a drink or would it have to be me giving oral to a chick? I have no other symptoms, only this stupid tiny bump.

Funny thing is I don't even really like going down. Now isn't that a b*tch.
 
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"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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aldaris

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where is lms when you need him?

what the hell are you doing giving oral to a hor? when i tell you to bang'em i don't mean to lick them like the flavor of the month at baskin-robbins. hit it and leave.

why all this oral stuff? that is her pee-pee machine down there. for all you know you could have been licking up another man's love potion when you were doing that stupid stuff.

respect the virgins and bang the hors!! (just don't lick the pee-pee machine)
 
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OMG!!!!! If you want to stay ALIVE cut off your tongue now!!!
 

aldaris

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Last Man Standing said:
OMG!!!!! If you want to stay ALIVE cut off your tongue now!!!
somebody make this man the moderator
 

The Inside Man

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LOL wow. LMS you're killing me with this post and the one with the kid that made out with the 42 yr old. I hope I didnt wake up my neighbors laughing.

to OP I didn't look at the pic but oral herpes is more than just a bump on your tongue, that could be a swollen taste bud maybe? My best bro got oral herpes from making out with a girl, I've discussed it a few times here on other threads, and he says it is extremely painful and you get blisters on your lips and mouth. We've all gone down on girls, some we shouldn't, but hopefully this gets better and don't go down on a girl unless shes your gf and shes been tested.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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ready123

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herpes doesn't go on your tongue, only the outside of your mouth
 

Skel

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Get it checked out at the Doctor but it doesent look like herpes to me.
 

comic_relief

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Skel said:
Get it checked out at the Doctor but it doesent look like herpes to me.
comic_relief
 

DonGorgon

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looks like oral thrush (over growth of natural body flor) which is not a good sign as it usually represents people with weakened immune systems.

GO TO THE DOCTOR ASAP AND GET TESTED.
 

KontrollerX

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Yeah it could be oral thrush.

Been eating any non fully baked goods lately such as baked bread or doughy not fully cooked cookies? lol.

That could do it.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Road Demon

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KontrollerX

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Canker sores usually you get from eating salty foods or just getting your tongue roughed up a bit too much by rough foods.

They can develop from that or just show up randomly.

Sometimes they appear as a tiny clearish white dot on your tongue.

Some are mildly painful and some are very painful if you try to break them open to release the pressure.

They tend to go away on their own after a while if left alone.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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Tear Gas

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i sometimes get those when i brush my tongue too rough...they kinda feel like a pimple on your tongue. They go away eventually.
 

aldaris

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The Inside Man said:
We've all gone down on girls, some we shouldn't, but hopefully this gets better and don't go down on a girl unless shes your gf and shes been tested.
no we haven't! that is the pee-pee machine you are talking about. fungus and bacteria grow down there. other men leave their deposits in these hors. if you don't have the skills to get a young virgin than don't lick!
 

DonGorgon

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aldaris said:
no we haven't! that is the pee-pee machine you are talking about. fungus and bacteria grow down there. other men leave their deposits in these hors. if you don't have the skills to get a young virgin than don't lick!
^^that sounds funny and scary at the same time...
 

The Inside Man

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Yeah I'm sure you're 46 year old ass is picking up plenty of "young virgins". I have gone down on only 4 girls, and 3 of them were virgins, for a fact. The last one wasn't, and it was stupid, but I learned my lesson. Good luck with your young virgins, how often do you get laid then once every 5 years? Most girls lose their virginity between 16-20, after college you're not going to find too many that still have the v card.
 

Infamous J

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Too bad I'm a cheap bastard or I would have gone to the doctor already.

Most the feedback seems good as far as it not being herpes, but are you overlooking that it's come and gone several times, I'd say 4 or 5 over the last couple of years? I don't believe cankers do that and as for that oral thrush thing, could be, but I almost never get sick so my immune system seems fine.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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