Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
thats because you probably don't have one LOL. yeah totally, a girl would have in a relationship if she was totally with the relationship. the guy has single usually. i think she doesn't want other guys to know she is taken. my friends do that when they dont want other chicks to know they are with a girl. their girfriends get mad about that bugging them to change. dont force her to or she wont but I can tell you that something is up with her not doing it.Zarky said:I hide my relp status from everyone.
I myself do not even have a facebook and I agree with your quote.snowdog said:
That **** is for keeping in touch with high school friends, nothing more.
Why should you give a **** what's on that stupid ****.
She's BPD and you're pressuring her to be in an official relationship with you? WHY? And the best way to achieve it would be to just shut up about it. If she puts that status on there, how is she going to make sure guys will hit on her? I mean, they'll know she's not single, they might back off. There's no way she's going to make sure she's getting a replacement with that status.joverby said:Do you guys put too much stress on Facebook relationship status? Lets say you send the "request" to your "girlfriend" and she doesn't accept it. Would you even say anything? I have had a lot of other issues and I think this would just be a reflection of that, I won't go into details.
Broke up, got back w/ her the same day(like 4-5 hours later). Ended up banging her the other night(a day after our break up?) Same day we broke up she changed it to single. Then I think just made it hidden later that day when we got back together but didn't change it back.
Leaving the morning before leaving I asked her (calmly and indifferently, tried my best poker face at least) if she was going to change her status back. She just gave me a "Baby...." in a sincere / you shouldn't be worried about that tone. Said she changed it the day before already(I think this was her way of not technically lying in her mind becasue she did change it, just to single) and asked if I wanted to check. I declined.
Went home and checked it later, saw she deleted the post from her wall saying from in a relationship to single. Didn't see one going from single to in a relationship. But saw at the top of her page it was displayed she was in a relationship then. So I can assume she just changed it when I left.
Sent her the request yesterday to say we are in a relationship. Don't think she got on at all later yesterday to update it. But she did give me a call after she was done w/ work and we had a really good convo(could tell IL was sky high, at least for now, pretty sure she's BPD but that's another story)
Haven't had a chance yet to see if she accepted it today since I'm at work. But I'm about to when I get home. If she has been on(which she normally does daily, updates etc.) and hasn't accepted it think I'm just going to end it. This isn't the only reason so don't think so, it just seems to be really the icing on the cake for me.
But that's kind of why I'm posting this, maybe I'm over analyzing? But I don't think so. I just don't get how we can go from amazing sex and her wanting me to hold her / cuddle to sleep and being all affectionate not wanting me to leave that morning to not publically acknowledging our relationship. Sh1ts fvcked up bros.....
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
:rock:joverby said:blah
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
joverby said:I feel compelled to vent so don't read if you don't want to.
But just to clarify, the day we broke up she changed her facebook status to single just hours after. We "get back together" like 5 hours after breaking up. I wait until the day after and ask her if she is planning on switching it back to "in a relationship." She just gets all sincere and says she already did and asks if I want to check.(Her phone) I decline. Go home later and see she is now "in a relationsip" BUT her original status update going from "in a relationship" to "single" was deleted(that a couple of her friends commented on) and there wasn't an update going from "single" to "in a relationship"(Which would all be time stamped) So to me it was pretty obvious she changed it right after me asking her about it and deleted the updates so I couldn't see she was lying. And right after this I sent her a request to be in a relationship, which she has still yet to accept.
So, rewind to two days ago. I ask her why she hasn't accepted it yet and her first reason was becasue she didn't see it yet and asked if I wanted to see, I declined again. Kind of wish I wouldn't have to see if she would've actually let me or just reverted back and start the offensive.(She has a blackberry which gives her e-mail updates and a facebook app) I also said it had me worried that she would delete her status updates. She claimed that facebook automatically did it after she changed it back and she thought it was weird.
She then proceeded to trivialze the arguement. Saying things like "So what if I did even ignore it,who cares It's facebook.", "this is like someone getting mad about getting deleted(as a friend).", "I didn't get mad when my cousin didn't accept my family request for like a month.", "I could delete my facebook right now and not even care."(to which I replied, "OK, do it." of course she didn't cause she didn't need to prove anything) etc. I just had to keep re-stating that it wasn't the status of it on facebook that had me worried it was her act of chosing to ignore it, as I couldn't think of anything positive. We went back and forth for a little while w/ her trivializing it and me trying to explain it was the action(or lack there of).
IDK how I sat there and didn't call her out. I agree the facebook status it's self isn't that big of a deal as long as it's depicted accurately. I do think it's(or there is one) a problem if you won't publically display your relationship. I just wish she could be honest(about what she wants) but I know that's just how she is obviously. Because I could dettach myself and just come over to bang or something if that's what she wants. IDK, I guess everything else is pretty irrelevant becasue she has been lying to me / disrespecting. This is also why you say you can't negotiate feelings etc...
You obviously don't get the reasoning for why I thought it was fvcked up / had a latent problem and obviously have very drastic opinion on how you want your relationship to be. So instead of trying to force me to be you / want what you want out of a relationship you could maybe realize not everyone hast he same ideals as you and offer something more than "I'm way more manly than you."irocknike23 said:dude your a vagina i swear.
who gives a fvck about relationship status on FB
you 2 know what you guys got together...why do you need to let the world know so bad?
IMO keeping your status single will just let more females talk to you and keep future options open rather then them looking at you in a relationship and not getting at you
and your probably a control freak the type of the dude who checks his girls phone to see who she been calling and texting and always want to know where she is at and what she is doingjoverby said:You obviously don't get the reasoning for why I thought it was fvcked up / had a latent problem and obviously have very drastic opinion on how you want your relationship to be. So instead of trying to force me to be you / want what you want out of a relationship you could maybe realize not everyone hast he same ideals as you and offer something more than "I'm way more manly than you."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.