"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Ex's wedding invitation - What to do?

Y

YeeZus

Don Juan
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Brothers,

Ex who dumped me in January is getting married this December. As soon as she dumped me there was few AFC things that I did but went full NC for 4 months. From June - October we were again romantically and sexually involved (She initiated contact). October first week she dropped the bomb that she is getting married (arranged marriage) and I'm again in NC from that day.

Problem: -
1) We both work in the same firm and her desk is nearby (I ignore her by the way)
2) Today she walked down to my desk and gave me her wedding invitation card and asked me to please be there for her wedding.
3) I still have feeling for her not much but somewhere deep inside it hurts but its far better than that in January.

Please advise on point number 2 mainly.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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B

Between_The_Lines

Master Don Juan
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Tell her you're pretty sure you'll have diarrhea/pneumonia/Ebola symptoms that weekend.

It's not a "problem" because you don't owe her anything. What do you think you stand to gain from this? Closure????
 
A

Albatross953

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Don't go, that's ridiculous. Double your efforts to move on.
 
Y

YeeZus

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Between_The_Lines said:
Tell her you're pretty sure you'll have diarrhea/pneumonia/Ebola symptoms that weekend.
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HAHAH! Anyways its not about closure I've been thinking of once she is out of office I will go to her desk and put that card in her dustbin that might answer if I'm coming or not.

I just want to know what should be my next move when she has given me her wedding card?
 
B

Between_The_Lines

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Stop overcomplicating this in the name of hope.

She gives you the card. You reply "cool" and get back to work.
She: "so are you going to be able to make it?"
You: "maybe"
She: "I need to know for certain"
You: "I'll keep you posted"

Give her some BS reason later as to why you can't make it or just tell her straight up that you're not interested in going. She's getting MARRIED. There's zero hope here. Your "next move" is you get on with your life and forget her.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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El Payaso

El Payaso

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Between_The_Lines said:
Stop overcomplicating this in the name of hope.

She gives you the card. You reply "cool" and get back to work.
She: "so are you going to be able to make it?"
You: "maybe"
She: "I need to know for certain"
You: "I'll keep you posted"

Give her some BS reason later as to why you can't make it or just tell her straight up that you're not interested in going. She's getting MARRIED. There's zero hope here. Your "next move" is you get on with your life and forget her.
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This. Tell her outright you're not coming or simply flake. End of discussion.
 
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