"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Ex's wedding invitation - What to do?

YeeZus

Don Juan
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Brothers,

Ex who dumped me in January is getting married this December. As soon as she dumped me there was few AFC things that I did but went full NC for 4 months. From June - October we were again romantically and sexually involved (She initiated contact). October first week she dropped the bomb that she is getting married (arranged marriage) and I'm again in NC from that day.

Problem: -
1) We both work in the same firm and her desk is nearby (I ignore her by the way)
2) Today she walked down to my desk and gave me her wedding invitation card and asked me to please be there for her wedding.
3) I still have feeling for her not much but somewhere deep inside it hurts but its far better than that in January.

Please advise on point number 2 mainly.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Between_The_Lines

Master Don Juan
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Tell her you're pretty sure you'll have diarrhea/pneumonia/Ebola symptoms that weekend.

It's not a "problem" because you don't owe her anything. What do you think you stand to gain from this? Closure????
 

Albatross953

Master Don Juan
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Don't go, that's ridiculous. Double your efforts to move on.
 

YeeZus

Don Juan
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Between_The_Lines said:
Tell her you're pretty sure you'll have diarrhea/pneumonia/Ebola symptoms that weekend.
HAHAH! Anyways its not about closure I've been thinking of once she is out of office I will go to her desk and put that card in her dustbin that might answer if I'm coming or not.

I just want to know what should be my next move when she has given me her wedding card?
 

Between_The_Lines

Master Don Juan
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Stop overcomplicating this in the name of hope.

She gives you the card. You reply "cool" and get back to work.
She: "so are you going to be able to make it?"
You: "maybe"
She: "I need to know for certain"
You: "I'll keep you posted"

Give her some BS reason later as to why you can't make it or just tell her straight up that you're not interested in going. She's getting MARRIED. There's zero hope here. Your "next move" is you get on with your life and forget her.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

El Payaso

Master Don Juan
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Between_The_Lines said:
Stop overcomplicating this in the name of hope.

She gives you the card. You reply "cool" and get back to work.
She: "so are you going to be able to make it?"
You: "maybe"
She: "I need to know for certain"
You: "I'll keep you posted"

Give her some BS reason later as to why you can't make it or just tell her straight up that you're not interested in going. She's getting MARRIED. There's zero hope here. Your "next move" is you get on with your life and forget her.
This. Tell her outright you're not coming or simply flake. End of discussion.
 
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