Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Explain me her behaviour

SayWhat

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2012
Messages
442
Reaction score
23
Been texting a girl at work for a while now, we don't see each other often at work because of different workplaces. But yesterday we arrived at the same time and walked towards the building.

Our texting has been going great, good conversations, slightly sexual from time (I don't ask her out because of the fact we work together), but nonetheless she knows I'm going too as soon as we go to work at different places (which will happen eventually).

But when we walked towards the building, it was so hard to get a conversation out of her, it felt like she hated talking to me. And then when we entered the building (security doors, so only one at the time). She didn't even waited and just went of to her workplace, I heard her meet someone and was all chatty and laughing.

Now in the evening I get a text from her as usual. I gave one reply but then was of doing some stuff. When I checked my phone at around 2am, I saw she texted something else and double texted like three times to get my attention (like "are you still alive?"). I answered.

She just replied on my text way later than she would normally do which just a short response (again not like the usual), including the word "whatever". Is she just testing me, mad because I didn't text her yesterday evening? I don't really want to loose her as I truly think something is there, but it feels like it's over.

And another question, should I call her out on her bvll**** of being fvcking weird when we walked together or just pretend like nothing happened?
 

EyeOnThePrize

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2019
Messages
654
Reaction score
883
Age
29
No need to call her out, she'll deny it to her death. She is playing you for attention. Do you think a girl that was interested in you sexually would be cold in person like that? She knows she has you, she knows you're hooked, and that turns her off. She doesn't want that power over you.

Most likely nothing will happen with her unless you dare her to stop talking to you. Don't dare her with words, dare her with actions. Don't initiate conversation, don't ask her anything unless she asks you first, don't bring up meeting up unless she's practically begging you to and you're 1000% sure she'd say yes if you asked. Be willing to lose this connection, because your self respect is more important. That's manly, that will polarize her, and will ultimately attract her if she's still interested.
 

metalwater

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
452
Reaction score
409
friend zone her. tell her not interested in dating, but as we work together let's be friends. don't carry any furniture for her... priority work over her, keep the workplace smooth.
 

bcude

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2019
Messages
584
Reaction score
907
Age
38
But when we walked towards the building, it was so hard to get a conversation out of her, it felt like she hated talking to me. And then when we entered the building (security doors, so only one at the time). She didn't even waited and just went of to her workplace, I heard her meet someone and was all chatty and laughing.
Her actions are telling you that she doesn't value or wants to be near you. Find your self-respect and kick this ***** to the curve.
if ANY communication is taking place she demoted herself to the lowest possible place through her behavior. The only thing women respond to are removal of attention. Fwiw, i wouldn't have answered her text in the evening if it didn't include some form of apology.
 

image

"If you love women, you must read the SoSuave Guide to Women. It's fantastic!"

Mauser96

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 28, 2012
Messages
5,105
Reaction score
2,410
She is enjoying all the attention you give her by text, it occupies her time and makes her feel good about herself.

But she doesn't want to date you, hence the cold behavior in person.
 

dude99

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 1, 2016
Messages
2,178
Reaction score
2,498
Age
47
Been texting a girl at work for a while now, we don't see each other often at work because of different workplaces. But yesterday we arrived at the same time and walked towards the building.

Our texting has been going great, good conversations, slightly sexual from time (I don't ask her out because of the fact we work together), but nonetheless she knows I'm going too as soon as we go to work at different places (which will happen eventually).

But when we walked towards the building, it was so hard to get a conversation out of her, it felt like she hated talking to me. And then when we entered the building (security doors, so only one at the time). She didn't even waited and just went of to her workplace, I heard her meet someone and was all chatty and laughing.

Now in the evening I get a text from her as usual. I gave one reply but then was of doing some stuff. When I checked my phone at around 2am, I saw she texted something else and double texted like three times to get my attention (like "are you still alive?"). I answered.

She just replied on my text way later than she would normally do which just a short response (again not like the usual), including the word "whatever". Is she just testing me, mad because I didn't text her yesterday evening? I don't really want to loose her as I truly think something is there, but it feels like it's over.

And another question, should I call her out on her bvll**** of being fvcking weird when we walked together or just pretend like nothing happened?
Number one rule. Read her actions. Not her words.

First, she is a coworker. Id stay away but no one on here listens so here is my answer.

Your texts might be nothing but validation and attention. She may text you out of nothing but boredom and is looking for you to entertain her.

Her being cold and ignoring you in person says more about how she feels, than any text could.

Answer her texts by telling her you are busy. You will get back to her later.

Then see her again at work and if she is cold and detached like the last time, cut and next.
 
Last edited:

jaymbrs

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 27, 2017
Messages
1,205
Reaction score
968
Age
33
Why am I seeing so many threads of dudes trying to date women they work with.. it's like they don't have any life outside of that or make any attempt to meet them else where..
A ton of people meet prospective partners at work. Also not everyone works the same type of job.
 

Kotaix

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2019
Messages
837
Reaction score
901
Age
42
She just wants validation. If she's not smiling at you in person then she's not really interested. Find someone else.
 

jaymbrs

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 27, 2017
Messages
1,205
Reaction score
968
Age
33
I was going to err on the side that maybe she was having a bad morning. You just never know. However if she didnt bring up why she was acting cold and distant in person, then I'd take that as a bad sign.
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 27, 2015
Messages
14,808
Reaction score
9,306
Location
DFW, TX
I was going to err on the side that maybe she was having a bad morning. You just never know. However if she didnt bring up why she was acting cold and distant in person, then I'd take that as a bad sign.
We're wasting all this TIME and ATTENTION on hypoteticizing a "work" situation? He's already effed! LOL! It should all flow freely and be fun. Once it is not you shouldn't be worried about it.

Even talking about it in the forum is giving it too much ATTENTION. There is a cost brother. That same attention you could be used on yourself or your purpose, or a woman who is already giving it up to you.
 

stringpuller

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2017
Messages
5,075
Reaction score
3,159
Our texting has been going great, good conversations
No they are not actually. Great conversations via text are not "going great" its just the truth of it. Not trying to bust your balls to much here.
(I don't ask her out because of the fact we work together
Then why? Why man?
Now in the evening I get a text from her as usual. I gave one reply but then was of doing some stuff.
Why did you reply? Why not NOT reply at all? Seeing how its SO HARD to get a convo going with her why not ignore her until she makes the effort to walk up and ask you "why the fck are you not text me back"
Then you could say i dunno your kinda weird. But cute...but weird. Whats up? Why does it bother you we work together...its not like your my wife <---------
OP learn how to be a bit ****y and an azzhole and don't make her puzz the prize.
She just replied on my text way later than she would normally do which just a short response (again not like the usual), including the word "whatever". Is she just testing me,
No shes fcking with you. Have some standards. Make her play your way. Not hers. Or its :up::up::up: take a hike...
 

SayWhat

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2012
Messages
442
Reaction score
23
Point is, she smiles otherwise, we never really talk in real life simply because we have different offices, but if we see each other there's normally a wave or a smile.

The reason I don't go for it, even though we work together, is just because I had a bad experience in the past. We are going different places in a few months so I just want to keep it going.

@ Stringpuller, conversations with her are not hard. Well sometimes they are, at moments like these. But normally we have free flowing conversations and it's not difficult to keep it going.

But yeah that situation really fvcked it all up. I've been wrong a lot with reading situations, but the fact that she just left after she entered the security door, it's hard for me to grasp. The conversation towards the building was weird and difficult, but I can justify that for certain reasons (these would take me paragraphs to explain though).

But then again, when she texted her short response with the word "whatever" in it. I just replied normal how I would normally do. But since now (about 10 hours later and after her seeing at work etc), no response whatsoever.
 

image

Put away your credit card.

You can now read our detailed guide to women and dating for free - Right Here!

stringpuller

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2017
Messages
5,075
Reaction score
3,159
@ Stringpuller, conversations with her are not hard. Well sometimes they are, at moments like these. But normally we have free flowing conversations and it's not difficult to keep it going.
This is not what you said above in your OP. You said convos are difficult...you said it
 

stringpuller

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2017
Messages
5,075
Reaction score
3,159
Exactly what @Glassguy just said.
Shes professional realm.

Rejected
Rejector
professional
Family

Pick one OP. You only have 4.

Only one left is #5 and thats lover.
 

Barrister

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 28, 2018
Messages
225
Reaction score
236
Age
34
Been texting a girl at work for a while now, we don't see each other often at work because of different workplaces. But yesterday we arrived at the same time and walked towards the building.

Our texting has been going great, good conversations, slightly sexual from time (I don't ask her out because of the fact we work together), but nonetheless she knows I'm going too as soon as we go to work at different places (which will happen eventually).

But when we walked towards the building, it was so hard to get a conversation out of her, it felt like she hated talking to me. And then when we entered the building (security doors, so only one at the time). She didn't even waited and just went of to her workplace, I heard her meet someone and was all chatty and laughing.

Now in the evening I get a text from her as usual. I gave one reply but then was of doing some stuff. When I checked my phone at around 2am, I saw she texted something else and double texted like three times to get my attention (like "are you still alive?"). I answered.

She just replied on my text way later than she would normally do which just a short response (again not like the usual), including the word "whatever". Is she just testing me, mad because I didn't text her yesterday evening? I don't really want to loose her as I truly think something is there, but it feels like it's over.

And another question, should I call her out on her bvll**** of being fvcking weird when we walked together or just pretend like nothing happened?
Don't respond to the last text and stop contacting her altogether. She will probably reach out with piqued interest eventually once you do this. But this is pointless anyway because you should never "sh1t where you eat." I would just forget about it altogether and pursue a different woman.

Oh - and absolutely under no circumstances "call her out." Not only will this make you look super weak and you should never do a "calling out" with any woman for this very reason -- but since you both work in the same place if you make her uncomfortable enough she may report your behavior for harassment. Be smart.

Edit: Just saw you work in "different workplaces" but then described entering the same building. I would still avoid.
 

SayWhat

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2012
Messages
442
Reaction score
23
I’ll not respond or initiate, but the last few weeks we’ve always been texting every single night.

Not this night though, sure there might be someone else in the picture, but I don’t buy it, not this sudden.
 

EyeOnThePrize

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 9, 2019
Messages
654
Reaction score
883
Age
29
I’ll not respond or initiate, but the last few weeks we’ve always been texting every single night.

Not this night though, sure there might be someone else in the picture, but I don’t buy it, not this sudden.
Focus on showing an effortless attitude, so don't read into silence. Focus on your own life and if she shows up or reaches out be chill and nonchalant, like nothing happened. Meantime focus on your endeavors and talk up other women, just don't identify with your success with them.
 
Top