I've been seeing this girl for a little over a month, and lately her ex-boyfriend has become a real pain in the as$. They agreed to "remain friends" and keep in touch from time to time. He's a huge AFC though, and has whined since he found out she started seeing me. Recently, he's been saying some nasty shlt to her, like calling her a slut on messenger and then quickly typing "just kidding" right afterwards. He's also trying to screw things up for me by saying stuff like "he's trying to control you" and "he's just using you for sex" to her. It's very obvious to everyone including her that he's AFC and I'm not threatened by him. At the same time, he's talking shlt to both my girl and about me. How do I address this issue? I already asked her to cut off all contact, but she hasn't made that much of an effort to do it. I didn't really force the issue. Do I deliver an ultimatum; him or me? Any good advice would be appreciated.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Exboyfriend Causing Trouble In Relationship
- Thread starter bacchus
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
DonJuanMonk
Master Don Juan
That's HER PROLBEM not yours, Why do you care? Oh...cause YOU PUT UP WITH her behavior on this?
An AFC "PUTS UP" with a girl's behavior. That in fact makes you an AFC too does it not?
Ultimatum? I would just tell her "Let me know when you put your past behind you and then we can get together sometime, but for now we should have some space." From then you look for other girls to waste time and money on.
An AFC "PUTS UP" with a girl's behavior. That in fact makes you an AFC too does it not?
Ultimatum? I would just tell her "Let me know when you put your past behind you and then we can get together sometime, but for now we should have some space." From then you look for other girls to waste time and money on.
Pimp-sicle
Master Don Juan
Why do I know without even asking that your dating that BPD chick you were obessed with before? Don't lie either, if you are then its cool, you need to experience it first hand and get it out of your system. And guess what, all that shiat her exbf is saying about her is true and its going to come back to bite you in the @ss sooner or later.
Get out of hell.
PIMP
MR_PERFECT
Senior Don Juan
I would never date a girl who has an ex as a friend. We're all guys in here, we know why we would keep an ex around: booty call, or possible relationship.
I once had a female friend that didn't believe me when I told her this. She kept in touch with several guys from her past and they would come by the house to say hi. Over the course of a two week period, all of them propositioned her in one way or another.
I once had a female friend that didn't believe me when I told her this. She kept in touch with several guys from her past and they would come by the house to say hi. Over the course of a two week period, all of them propositioned her in one way or another.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.