Dated a girl for over 8 months. She's a lot younger than me but everything seemed to click from personality to sex. The physical and emotional connection was intense and fantastic. We were about to meet each other's parents and discuss moving arrangements. But there were fights, largely stemming from how similar we are and how much we challenged each other. The fights were small, but not to her. And we also had a few bad ones while I was drinking. I was not my best self during those moments and at the end she broke up with me. I have since quit drinking since then but the damage was done..she blocked me on everything and asked me to move on.
I saw her at a bar a month later but gave her space. I didn't approach. She ended up coming to me and giving me a hug and saying "nice to see you." That was it for contact. For 2 more months.
I ran into a mutual friend by month 3 of NC and he let it slip that she had a new bf. I wasn't happy. I did end up running into her at a club a few days later. She expected to just be friends but our conversation was loaded with feelings. We started out venting on each other. I was mad because she moved on quickly and she was mad because I said I didn't love her. I asked if she loved him and she said no. I asked about me and she said yes. To hurt her I said I didn't love her and had never been happier. I walked away.
She cried all night apparently. I woke up to a nasty text. I was unblocked. We went back and forth for the entire day via messaging and then the next thing we knew we were reminiscing about our past. And how good everything was. She disappears for a bit and then messages me again saying she is thinking about me at a bar. She asks if we can meet in person. I think I have nothing to lose and meet her.
We chat for 3-4 hours. During the time it comes out that we are both still in love. We catch up on things and each of us is happy with the progress the other has made. She is dating a guy she has known for years and they never fight. But she's not in love. She has no problem with me touching her or telling her I want to kiss her but can't. I let her know I'm talking to girls and she isn't happy.
I'm not putting pressure on her at this point but it's starting to look like we both want this to work out. But there is this bf obstacle she happens to be fond of. At least until I showed up. And she's right, he hasn't done anything wrong.
We part ways at 4am and the next morning she is messaging like we are together. By evening she is asking to meet again, to continue our conversation. I thought it would be a bad idea because all of this running around is borderline cheating now. She apologized for blocking me all these months. Said she can't stand seeing me on FB messenger now and not being able to talk to me. I tell her it's the way it has to be for now. We agree that it's not appropriate to talk at this time. The plan I suppose is to see if she will break up with the guy she is not in love with with the guy she has a real mental and physical connection with.
I want to be with her. Should I stop talking to her altogether while she figures it out? It's awkward for me talking to new girls I have less interest in and wondering if I have to blow them off soon. Should we both just talk and see if we can put these other options/her bf on pause so we can really talk and see if we can make this work?
I saw her at a bar a month later but gave her space. I didn't approach. She ended up coming to me and giving me a hug and saying "nice to see you." That was it for contact. For 2 more months.
I ran into a mutual friend by month 3 of NC and he let it slip that she had a new bf. I wasn't happy. I did end up running into her at a club a few days later. She expected to just be friends but our conversation was loaded with feelings. We started out venting on each other. I was mad because she moved on quickly and she was mad because I said I didn't love her. I asked if she loved him and she said no. I asked about me and she said yes. To hurt her I said I didn't love her and had never been happier. I walked away.
She cried all night apparently. I woke up to a nasty text. I was unblocked. We went back and forth for the entire day via messaging and then the next thing we knew we were reminiscing about our past. And how good everything was. She disappears for a bit and then messages me again saying she is thinking about me at a bar. She asks if we can meet in person. I think I have nothing to lose and meet her.
We chat for 3-4 hours. During the time it comes out that we are both still in love. We catch up on things and each of us is happy with the progress the other has made. She is dating a guy she has known for years and they never fight. But she's not in love. She has no problem with me touching her or telling her I want to kiss her but can't. I let her know I'm talking to girls and she isn't happy.
I'm not putting pressure on her at this point but it's starting to look like we both want this to work out. But there is this bf obstacle she happens to be fond of. At least until I showed up. And she's right, he hasn't done anything wrong.
We part ways at 4am and the next morning she is messaging like we are together. By evening she is asking to meet again, to continue our conversation. I thought it would be a bad idea because all of this running around is borderline cheating now. She apologized for blocking me all these months. Said she can't stand seeing me on FB messenger now and not being able to talk to me. I tell her it's the way it has to be for now. We agree that it's not appropriate to talk at this time. The plan I suppose is to see if she will break up with the guy she is not in love with with the guy she has a real mental and physical connection with.
I want to be with her. Should I stop talking to her altogether while she figures it out? It's awkward for me talking to new girls I have less interest in and wondering if I have to blow them off soon. Should we both just talk and see if we can put these other options/her bf on pause so we can really talk and see if we can make this work?
