"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Ex girlfriend is trying to Rub it in. How do you think I handled it?

GoldenArrow

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Context:
It's been 2.5 months since we broke up in an amicable way. I wanted no contact, but she has been replying to my social media feeds and I have replied to her replies, as I didn't want to be an arsehole. I seldom initiate.

Incident:
- Yesterday, she posts a public story of a dude she's been flirting with (as seen on her social media posts, complimenting his looks etc and he'd flirt with her too), whereby she made a collage of him of all his topless pics and posts "what an amazing guy"
I've actually been dating other girls since we broke up. I felt that she was trying to make me jealous with her post, but I felt it was my opportunity to use her own post to distance her further. So I replied to her story:
Me: "Your new hunk?"
Her: "Well, I don't own anyone".
Me: "Your mancrush I should say ;)"
Her: "Thank you so much for giving me space! :)"
Me: "That's awesome, I'm glad the space is working for you. I'm really happy for you and I wish you the best of luck :):)"
She saw the message but didn't reply.

Sure I could have just ignored it, but there's no fun in that!
What are your thoughts on her, the intention of her public post, and my response?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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backseatjuan

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She thinks like a woman, the more men she dates or sleeps with the more successful she thinks she is. You're there just for attention, no matter the intentions you had. Why not unfollow her and stop replying to her comments? Her ego is her man, she don't give a fck. She's one fcked up girl to post everything online. Maybe go back and double post under that thank you, 'Sht, I'm glad you didn't post what we did in bed for all to see.:oops:"
 

Epic Days

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Why are you on social media? Do you have a business on there?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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GoldenArrow

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Why not unfollow her and stop replying to her comments? Her ego is her man, she don't give a fck. She's one fcked up girl to post everything online. "
I let others do the unfollowing when they can't take it :)
Generally speaking, I avoid displaying any negative reaction.
 

oldmanofthesea

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Why spend time and energy on an ex you are not interested in? Sending her messages like that shows her you're still thinking about her and her jealousy games are working on you. The opposite of love is indifference. Just ignore her. Don't respond to social media, including liking her posts.
 

GoldenArrow

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Why spend time and energy on an ex you are not interested in? Sending her messages like that shows her you're still thinking about her and her jealousy games are working on you. The opposite of love is indifference. Just ignore her. Don't respond to social media, including liking her posts.
Some good points there. I've replied to her replies just as a friend. I replied to the last story, just so I have something down in black and white in case she tries to flirt with me down the track (as she's done in the past). That's pretty much my last bit of entertainment and she'll be on ignore from here on.
 

lamath

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Indiference is the best anwser.

Any kind of attention you give her,
Its what she wants for you
 

GoldenArrow

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Indiference is the best anwser.

Any kind of attention you give her,
Its what she wants for you
You're right. I should stick to not initiating any conversation with her, and just ignore her attempts to get attention from me.
In the future, if she flirts with me or tries to get back with me, I should just ignore her. If she questions me further, my response should just be "I've moved on" or "i'm not interested". If she asks me about my dating life I should say "Meh, don't worry about my dating life - I'm pretty happy where I am".
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Atom Smasher

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Me: "Your new hunk?"
"I am jealous and bothered about this guy."

Her: "Well, I don't own anyone".
Typical meaningless womanspeak

Me: "Your mancrush I should say ;)"
"I am jealous and bothered about this guy."

Her: "Thank you so much for giving me space! :)
"I thought you said you were going to give me space, but you're not."

Me: "That's awesome, I'm glad the space is working for you. I'm really happy for you and I wish you the best of luck :):)"
"I can't give you space. I'm obsessed and haven't moved on yet. I'm miserable to know that you're having a good time and posting this to make me jealous."
 

SoSuave666

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Quit the ****ing smileys for crying out loud. Also, stop talking to your ex.
 

Hal9000

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Probably shouldn't have said anything. The opposite of love isn't hate, its indifference. Giving her any unsolicited attention only validates that she's the center of the universe.
 

speed dawg

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You made yourself look really weak.
 

Spaz

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She's enjoying every moment of it, reaffirming her opinion that u r a loser and now she's showing all her friends what a loser u really are.

You have inadvertently upped her value while lowering yours.

Take this as a learning curve, ur 1st priority is to remove her at once from all ur social media apps and also her contact details in ur handset.

This signifies that you hv moved on to her and more importantly to yourself.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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oldmanofthesea

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I've replied to her replies just as a friend.
I don't suggest being friends with women you have had a romantic history with unless YOU have ZERO feelings for her at all. And you must be honest with yourself about that. I've only encountered this dynamic very rarely in my life. Either I still wanted her, or she still wanted me.

When I break up with someone, as long as it's amicable, I stay friends on social media but I unfollow them so I'm not seeing their stuff, am not tempted to reply, and if I have any lingering emotions, they aren't constantly poked by seeing her updates. It isn't rude not to like their posts.... I am not in the business of offering free validation to girls. Ask yourself: What positive things do you receive by staying friends with her, on social media or otherwise?
 

stovepipe

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Sure I could have just ignored it, but there's no fun in that!

So it's more fun to make yourself look like the weak beta b1tch you are, that in turn led you to post this thread to waste our time and yours? Some of you are flat out retarded!
 

Robert28

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Me: "Your new hunk?"
"I am jealous and bothered about this guy."

Her: "Well, I don't own anyone".
Typical meaningless womanspeak

Me: "Your mancrush I should say ;)"
"I am jealous and bothered about this guy."

Her: "Thank you so much for giving me space! :)
"I thought you said you were going to give me space, but you're not."

Me: "That's awesome, I'm glad the space is working for you. I'm really happy for you and I wish you the best of luck :):)"
"I can't give you space. I'm obsessed and haven't moved on yet. I'm miserable to know that you're having a good time and posting this to make me jealous."
The “thanks for giving me space” comment isn’t accurate. All she means is “thank you so much for being cool with me slutting it up, it’s nice to hop back on the **** carousel with a free and clear mind and no judgement from you!”
 

Atom Smasher

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The “thanks for giving me space” comment isn’t accurate. All she means is “thank you so much for being cool with me slutting it up, it’s nice to hop back on the **** carousel with a free and clear mind and no judgement from you!”
Could be.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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