"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Ex contacted me on FB

bish0p

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All right, long story short...I dated a woman for a little more than a year. I broke up with her constantly because I couldn't control my emotions around her; however, I always went back to her either because she called me or I called her. I took took her for granted until she started pushing me away. I was able to keep her at arms length because I've always been suspicious of her intentions.

She became very keen to how I would act and she knew that by pushing me away, I would chase her even more. It's like she was intentionally trying to get revenge on me because I acted like I didn't care. I did, but I had a difficult time balancing between caring for her and not giving into her demands too much. She has a very big ego and knows that men want her. She gave a lot early on in the relationship, but I constantly rejected her efforts.

The last time I broke up with her, she told me that she had went out with another guy who she said treated her differently then I did. She stated that she didn't want to end the relationship still and I'm not sure if she really went out with him or if she was trying to make me jealous. I lost it and at first, begged her not to do this, but then insulted her because she wouldn't take me back. I apologized for this and she tried to LJBF me.

I declined two of her offers to be just friends. She contacted me once to see how I was doing 3 days after she said she wanted to be friends, and now after 18 days of NC, she writes me on FB asking how everything is going. I do want her back, but I know I left things with her having all of the power. The last break up completely broke me down, but I was able to keep some dignity by going into NC. I'm on the No Contact Challenge and I haven't figured out how I want to approach this. I know that she can live without me (she has proven as much) and I can live without her, but I would like to give it one last shot when I'm emotionally stable.

Is this situation fixable?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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In2theGame

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bish0p said:
All right, long story short...I dated a woman for a little more than a year. I broke up with her constantly because I couldn't control my emotions around her; however, I always went back to her either because she called me or I called her. I took took her for granted until she started pushing me away. I was able to keep her at arms length because I've always been suspicious of her intentions.

She became very keen to how I would act and she knew that by pushing me away, I would chase her even more. It's like she was intentionally trying to get revenge on me because I acted like I didn't care. I did, but I had a difficult time balancing between caring for her and not giving into her demands too much. She has a very big ego and knows that men want her. She gave a lot early on in the relationship, but I constantly rejected her efforts.

The last time I broke up with her, she told me that she had went out with another guy who she said treated her differently then I did. She stated that she didn't want to end the relationship still and I'm not sure if she really went out with him or if she was trying to make me jealous. I lost it and at first, begged her not to do this, but then insulted her because she wouldn't take me back. I apologized for this and she tried to LJBF me.

I declined two of her offers to be just friends. She contacted me once to see how I was doing 3 days after she said she wanted to be friends, and now after 18 days of NC, she writes me on FB asking how everything is going. I do want her back, but I know I left things with her having all of the power. The last break up completely broke me down, but I was able to keep some dignity by going into NC. I'm on the No Contact Challenge and I haven't figured out how I want to approach this. I know that she can live without me (she has proven as much) and I can live without her, but I would like to give it one last shot when I'm emotionally stable.

Is this situation fixable?
I didnt read your whole post, but from my experience Pal, Ex girlfriends are good for a Fvck Buddy at most. period.
 

jdbman11

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It's fixable, but she's going to have to chase you. No more begging or fighting. Get with some other women and clear your head. It will help drastically.
 

BlackJackal

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Let her go man. It's the best advice anyone will give you.
 

everywomanshero

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My opinion,

You can sort of **** buddy her, but even that will probably lose its fizzle pretty quickly. I also think it is unlikely you will not get sucked back into the drama.

Your only shot (which is already a hail mary with 20 seconds on the clock) imo is to not give a ****, not pretend to not give a ****, but genuinely not give a ****. If she isn't forced to chase you and win you over, she's never gonna respect you.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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