"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Ex contacted me after 10 years.

Smok1nAce

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ex gf contacted a mutual person we know of Instagram to give him, her number, to give to me. (I dont have any social media). This was over the weekend and I decided to text her today (4 days later). She really seems like she went of the rails and is still "figuring out life" (shes 27 now) since i knew her at 17, took her virginity, and broke up with her for another girl.

She said she been dreaming of me lately and wanted to reach out to me to see how i was doing. We texted back and fourth and just kind caught up with some general questions. She seemed kinda hostile, bitter and short, so I cut the convo short and said "I've got to go it was nice catching up with you. Be safe", she replies with "alright. you too". (She's contacts me just to act short and rude and **** on me??...women....smh.)

My question is should I pursue?

could be an easily lap up and since quarantine things have been a little quiet. I not really anxious to date anyone right now.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Billtx49

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I agree. Unless the convo was ended with an, It’s was nice catching up with you, let me know if you want to talk again, then let it go.
 

Black Widow Void

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Judging by her behavior, it sounds like she still has some slight (or more) resentment. If the incident was ten weeks ago, this might be understandable, but it's been ten years.

My guess is that she has something to 'prove.' I suspect that the more comfortable she feels around you, the more you'll see this negative side of her.

From what I'm picking up, it sounds like you were cordial to her (which is good). It also sounds like you were wise enough to end the conversation ... once her attitude started shifting.

Tempting as it may be, I'm thinking that nothing good would come by any sort of rekindling.
 

Billtx49

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I agree. More than likely her life isn’t going that well for her right now, she wanted some desire validation from a man, and OP didn’t jump through any hoops during the call to her, but that’s her individual deal to get past by herself which will take some time…
 

EyeBRollin

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One shot per woman per lifetime.

The best case scenario here is she can be a one or two time occasional lay. After that her resentment will come right back. If the sex was good go for it and invite her straight to your house. If not, just pass.

Do not attempt any kind of emotional relationship with her. That ship has long sailed.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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daproest1

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ex gf contacted a mutual person we know of Instagram to give him, her number, to give to me. (I dont have any social media). This was over the weekend and I decided to text her today (4 days later). She really seems like she went of the rails and is still "figuring out life" (shes 27 now) since i knew her at 17, took her virginity, and broke up with her for another girl.

She said she been dreaming of me lately and wanted to reach out to me to see how i was doing. We texted back and fourth and just kind caught up with some general questions. She seemed kinda hostile, bitter and short, so I cut the convo short and said "I've got to go it was nice catching up with you. Be safe", she replies with "alright. you too". (She's contacts me just to act short and rude and **** on me??...women....smh.)

My question is should I pursue?

could be an easily lap up and since quarantine things have been a little quiet. I not really anxious to date anyone right now.
Ahhhh 27. That’s the age. That’s when they’re LOST. She probably just dumped her long term bf and thought of you. My ex left at 27. After 6 years. My mom left her first love after 9 years when she was 27... and met my dumb asz dad a year later. Had me a year after that. Divorced him 5 years after that. Never had another man until I was like 14 years old. Still with the same guy. He left her for a year and a half. And then got her back. And my mom is a saint of a woman. Naive. Innocent. Low notch count. Workaholic. My Older brother’s ex wife. Japanese. 10 years younger than him. They were together 9 years married for 1. She left at 27 talkin about “I wanna see the world”. Most boring girl on the planet. Made no sense. She ended up married to some other dude a year later in Japan. Etc. 27 is the worst. Don’t take her seriously. Unless she’s seriously trying.
 
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2Rocky

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Lot can happen in 10 years. Probably wanted to know if you grew up.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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