Ex back in her life - thinking of ending it

[logicallefty]

WTF???

It's not a trust issue. It's a respect issue.

^^^this. Plus If she loved the dog so much she should have fought him for it. Did she try to fight him to get the dog back at all? I fought my ex in court for my dog, and I beat her.. So unless your ex put up a fight for this dog she must not have loved it all that much.. That's where I would stand with her on this..

Anytime I ever gave a woman a blessing to do anything involving an ex, something always happened where I regretted it. 100% of the time. It just never goes well.

 

[jc_80]

Do what you want, it's your life. For what it's worth, I don't think she did anything wrong at all.

I don't think she did anything "wrong", and I even told her the same. Im just tired of exes surfacing in my relationships. Like logical lefty said, it's always caused some sort of problem eventually.

 

[jc_80]

^^^this. Plus If she loved the dog so much she should have fought him for it. Did she try to fight him to get the dog back at all? I fought my ex in court for my dog, and I beat her.. So unless your ex put up a fight for this dog she must not have loved it all that much.. That's where I would stand with her on this..

Anytime I ever gave a woman a blessing to do anything involving an ex, something always happened where I regretted it. 100% of the time. It just never goes well.

That's another issue - she just told me last night that she gave the dog to him after a year of separation because she realized the dog needed him more. Lol

 

[CuddleJunkie]

I don't think she did anything "wrong", and I even told her the same. Im just tired of exes surfacing in my relationships. Like logical lefty said, it's always caused some sort of problem eventually.

I don't have a lot of experience, but to be honest it seems impossible to find some woman that has not some connection with an ex. I just read Desdinova's high score theory and it's mind blowing.

That's another issue - she just told me last night that she gave the dog to him after a year of separation because she realized the dog needed him more. Lol

Then it really seems like it was an excuse, but for some reason she changed her mind.

 

[grayclif]

Do what you want, it's your life. For what it's worth, I don't think she did anything wrong at all.

I'm with Bible on this. It seems your gf fully understood the ramifications of her actions and cancelled the meet. Point made. Let it go! A nice power f.ucking is in order, maybe a.nal.

 

[Desdinova]

I don't have a lot of experience, but to be honest it seems impossible to find some woman that has not some connection with an ex. I just read Desdinova's high score theory and it's mind blowing.

Then it really seems like it was an excuse, but for some reason she changed her mind.

The ex is higher up on her high score list, and the dog was a great excuse to see him again.

 

[jc_80]

Update - dumped her today.

I felt bad over the holidays when I was visiting. So I suggested we go visit the dog. She declined multiple times. I asked why. She said because she doesn't want to confuse her dog.

Yesterday she calls and says he sent her pics of the dog looking dirty and disheveled and said he really needs her to please come groom the dog so he can bathe her. So she thinks it will be just this one time.

I asked why she wants to see her now and not when I was there and open to it. She says because she didn't think I would want to meet his family since he's living with his parents. And because she didn't want me to see the dog without being groomed.

So I said stop being gullible and tell him to be a grown man and find a way to take care of his dog or go get your neglected dog back since you're the legal owner. Also said she kinda lied to me.
She swears it would be just once and she's entitled to change her mind.

So I said, so am I. We're done. Not giving up options for someone who feels entitled to continually change her mind about these things.

 

[sodbuster]

yeah, I'd see a red flag if she didn't want you to see him. It wouldn't have been an all clear if she HAD let you meet the ex. I've met current Boyfriends and slept with her again after some little argument, but this is worse in my eyes. SHe wanted to see the ex WITHOUT you so the sex "just happened"

 

[CuddleJunkie]

I asked why she wants to see her now and not when I was there and open to it.

You did the right thing jc_80. Are you going NC?

 

[Desdinova]

Remember, the dog is not the issue here. The dog is just a vehicle for communication between her and her ex. Let us proceed to learn...

So I suggested we go visit the dog.

That's like saying, "I don't mind if you visit with your ex and fancy the thoughts of having his d1ck inside of you"

he really needs her to please come groom the dog so he can bathe her. So she thinks it will be just this one time.

You gave her permission to visit her bf, and now you've changed your mind.

Not giving up options for someone who feels entitled to continually change her mind about these things.

She changed her mind because you failed to put your foot down and enforce where you stand on this issue. Instead, you "felt bad" and not only encouraged her, but pushed her to have it her way by telling her to go "visit the dog".

Her ex who is at the top of her high score list didn't get there by letting her visit other guys she fvcked.

 

[kenpiffyjr]

Remember, the dog is not the issue here. The dog is just a vehicle for communication between her and her ex. Let us proceed to learn...


That's like saying, "I don't mind if you visit with your ex and fancy the thoughts of having his d1ck inside of you"



You gave her permission to visit her bf, and now you've changed your mind.



She changed her mind because you failed to put your foot down and enforce where you stand on this issue. Instead, you "felt bad" and not only encouraged her, but pushed her to have it her way by telling her to go "visit the dog".

Her ex who is at the top of her high score list didn't get there by letting her visit other guys she fvcked.

Des...what is the thin line between not caring if she saw her ex which spikes her interest level bc he doesn't see a threat versus putting your foot down?

I'm thinking in a Hank Moody kind of way where his aloofness had women falling more for him

 

[Desdinova]

I have no clue who the fvck Hank Moody is.

It really depends on what your mindset is when it comes to situations like this:

Jealousy: You're afraid she's going to fvck him, so you give her an ultimatum to hopefully stop her from fvcking him.
Disrespect: She's in an exclusive relationship with you. Seeing an ex doesn't fit the criteria of being in a relationship.

When you're jealous, you lack confidence. When you're disrespected, you retain your confidence. The bottom line is women respect confident men.

 

[grayclif]

The OP shouldn't have brought the issue back up again because he "felt bad". He made a decision and should have stuck to it and concerned himself with something else.

 

[Desdinova]

The only way I have found that they will interpret it in a way favorable to you is when it is abundantly clear that they are replaceable. Usually they need a very clear visual reminder of who their replacement will be

That's an interesting viewpoint which I've never thought about before. I think confidence is still the bottom line here. A confident man will automatically have replacement options regardless of what his relationship status is. I swear that women can smell the estrogen of other women who are interested in their man.

 

[Kailex]

Dear God, this all sounded like a whole bunch of useless drama. Not even 6 months worth of relationship? I would have been done with her as soon as she mentioned the ex going through a divorce and her going over to to see the dog.

Sorry, not gonna be able to do it.

 

[exhausted]

if the dog was this important to her she would have been seeing it consistently from the very split.

Her ex is now available and now calling her to come see the dog? gtfoh..

if she goes you know what to do