"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Even I'm puzzled, why would an old ex reach out from nearly a year ago??

RickTheToad

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Interesting situation. I've posted before, and even I am perplexed a bit. Dated for several months, I went into the hospital for kidney stones, she basically went on vacation and I ended it. She reached out wishing me a happy birthday a few months ago, never responded. She just texted me a few hours ago wishing me well. I know for a fact she's seeing another dude. They're going to a wedding together for her sister in Florida. Yea, she hotter than the current two I am seeing, but I just cannot get over the fact the way she acted when I was in the hospital and surgery. I knew she'd reach out on my BD, but now, very strange.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Robert28

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Why? You could probably come up with 1,000,001 reasons and you still probably wouldn’t guess it. In my experience the chicks I dated that I didn’t think had much interest in me, they were the ones to reach out months to years later. The ones I thought would reach out I never heard from again.
 

RickTheToad

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Why? You could probably come up with 1,000,001 reasons and you still probably wouldn’t guess it. In my experience the chicks I dated that I didn’t think had much interest in me, they were the ones to reach out months to years later. The ones I thought would reach out I never heard from again.
If I didn't respond prior, why would I respond now? I was going to say I'm well, hope the same for you. But I am concerned that would open up a pandoras box. After her actions, I have zero trust in her. The only thing she has is her looks.. I think she's still shocked that I walked away. Not sure.
 

lamath

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If I didn't respond prior, why would I respond now? I was going to say I'm well, hope the same for you. But I am concerned that would open up a pandoras box. After her actions, I have zero trust in her. The only thing she has is her looks.. I think she's still shocked that I walked away. Not sure.
I remember your thread about her, she is far from gfmaterial.

Things with new bf are not going to well.and she is i need of a back up plan.
Or the fact that you ended things with her,, had an effect on her self esteem. She is probably not used to being dump.

Either way stay far away imo
 

Robert28

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If I didn't respond prior, why would I respond now? I was going to say I'm well, hope the same for you. But I am concerned that would open up a pandoras box. After her actions, I have zero trust in her. The only thing she has is her looks.. I think she's still shocked that I walked away. Not sure.
I’m honestly so bad with keeping numbers straight that I probably wouldn’t recognize an ex’s number if they text me out of the blue. A few are blocked but the rest are all deleted and I probably wouldn’t be able to guess who it was unless they told me their name.lol

You’ll drive yourself crazy wondering why she’s reaching out. She probably didn’t even know why, could be bored or could be looking to branch back to you. Could be wanting you to help her move.lol
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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RickTheToad

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I remember your thread about her, she is far from gfmaterial.

Things with new bf are not going to well.and she is i need of a back up plan.
Or the fact that you ended things with her,, had an effect on her self esteem. She is probably not used to being dump.

Either way stay far away imo
I’m honestly so bad with keeping numbers straight that I probably wouldn’t recognize an ex’s number if they text me out of the blue. A few are blocked but the rest are all deleted and I probably wouldn’t be able to guess who it was unless they told me their name.lol

You’ll drive yourself crazy wondering why she’s reaching out. She probably didn’t even know why, could be bored or could be looking to branch back to you. Could be wanting you to help her move.lol
I cannot break my rule of taking the trash back in. Yes, that experience.. It was unreal. I was just curious In her actions.. I’ve had ladies reach out, but I do not respond and they move on. This is the second time. Strange. I told her have a good life. Her response, you too. If you want to reach out, I’m here. I even said, not a chance. Her response, well, if you do, I’m here.

Bewildered to say the least...
 

Snake-eyes

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I cannot break my rule of taking the trash back in. Yes, that experience.. It was unreal. I was just curious In her actions.. I’ve had ladies reach out, but I do not respond and they move on. This is the second time. Strange. I told her have a good life. Her response, you too. If you want to reach out, I’m here. I even said, not a chance. Her response, well, if you do, I’m here.

Bewildered to say the least...
Women don’t take rejection lightly like men do. She’s not used to guys walking away from her, specially if she’s good looking. So therefor she’s either trying to get even with you on that matter, or the other things the guys mentioned here
 
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