Establishing social proof in a new location?

[The LadyKiller]

Over a month ago, I moved over a thousand miles away for a new job. From a social perspective, I was excited because I would be living in a much more active area than the sleepy suburb I previously lived and worked in. I thought this would be easy. It's not.

While I am living a short walk away from the bars and live in a medium-sized city with plenty of young people, I'm still a stranger. Due to the relocation, I didn't know anyone in the area prior to starting my job. But that's ok I thought - I didn't know anyone heading into my previous job and I made friends pretty quickly. But this is different. I get along with my new coworkers, all of whom relocated themselves. But while they all go out together, I'm often left out of the loop.

I feel I've certainly made the effort. I exchanged phone numbers with a number of coworkers. I have expressed an interest to go out and about, and for them to hit me up if people are getting drinks. I have even texted a couple of them about going to a bar I'd like to visit, but they're either working, "tired" or out of town. But all too often in my first month or two here, I hear stories from my coworkers about the great night that had...of which I had no prior knowledge.

What tips do you have? I don't need to be bff's with my coworkers, but I would like to go out and possibly meet others people through my coworkers. As written earlier, I get along with people in the office. But I'm not in the know when it comes to social activities.

 

[Billtx49]

Do not rely on your coworkers for your social life. They are only an additional aspect of such, not the center of it.
Hit the bars solo and make friends with the regulars and the more socially out going types first.
All you need in any given bar is one decent social friend, everything is automatic after that…
Then tell a coworker what a great time you had last night. Seek adventure and it will find you.

 

[The LadyKiller]

Do not rely on your coworkers for your social life. They are only an additional aspect of such, not the center of it.
Hit the bars solo and make friends with the regulars and the more socially out going types first.
All you need in any given bar is one decent social friend, everything is automatic after that…
Then tell a coworker what a great time you had last night. Seek adventure and it will find you.

Like I wrote in the OP, my only expectation in regards to my coworkers is that I can find some to go out with, allowing me to meet people through them and expand my social circle.

I'm not a "go to the bars alone" type guy at night. I have visited a bar by myself to watch football games when I want to get out of the house in the afternoon and no one else is around. With music blaring and people mostly cliqued up with their group of friends at night, I feel going to bars myself will be worth more effort than is the reward.

 

[skinnyguy]

Like I wrote in the OP, my only expectation in regards to my coworkers is that I can find some to go out with, allowing me to meet people through them and expand my social circle.

I'm not a "go to the bars alone" type guy at night. I have visited a bar by myself to watch football games when I want to get out of the house in the afternoon and no one else is around. With music blaring and people mostly cliqued up with their group of friends at night, I feel going to bars myself will be worth more effort than is the reward.

I know man. If you do go to bars alone you should game the GUYS because if you can show you have friends it’s easier to pull groups of women

 

[ubercat]

Y not meetup groups

 

[RangerMIke]

Get involved in organizations with missions you are interested in, then take leadership roles in those organizations....

For me I am very interested in sustainability and energy conservation, I'm involved in a couple of groups doing this. I'm also involved in a couple of education groups and an organization that is revitalizing a park corridor, and a business incubator. But you can get involved in ANYTHING... local politics... veterans support.... help the homeless.... pro-life groups... pro-choice groups... church... atheist groups... Whatever it is that you are interested in and get involved.

 

[marmel75]

Y not meetup groups

That's an excellent idea...there are groups for everything you can find online...find some that relate to things you are interested in and join them.

Im part of several of these groups related to programming in my area.