"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Enthusiastic while texting, bored while

C

Colin O'Brien

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 6, 2008
Messages
180
Reaction score
2
Location
nyc
I've been hanging with/hooking up with this girl for a few weeks.. we really only see each other on the weekends and we chat on AIM/texting a lot. When we're texting or whatever she's usually super open and excited to chat with me, but whenever we're together (usually with her friends) she almost never opens up.. she even rejects kino sometimes!

At first I just assumed she wasn't down for me anymore but I realized that she's usually the one eager to talk and hang out with me, and I've only seen her with her friends for the past few times so I think it might even be that she's shy around them. I dunno.. what do you guys think is going on here?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

D

dbot

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2003
Messages
530
Reaction score
63
Have you done anything physical with her yet (kissed/made out/etc)? Maybe she's just nervous when you're actually together.
 
H

hondo928

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 17, 2008
Messages
89
Reaction score
0
I'd go with nervousness, I'm guilty of the same thing sometimes, it's very easy to seem your excited over a text message, it's such an impersonal form of communication.
 
S

shaunuk

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2006
Messages
997
Reaction score
9
Location
Leeds, UK
When you hang out, are her friends always with you? That could be one reason for being standoff-ish. Some girls don't wanna be touchy-feely infront of their friends, and feel awkward/shy about doing such.

If she's like this when you two are alone it could be a comfort thing. You've got attraction (presumably, if you're hooking up), but comfort could be lacking. Getting the shag might be difficult before you build some comfort.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

G

Groovy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 21, 2008
Messages
752
Reaction score
22
FEar of rejection? Maybe she feels like she's being judged or something.

Anyways if I was you, I'd build an awsome fun vibe, be more extroverted and relaxed, she couldn't help it but to NOT join the fun.

It's not your job to make her have fun, but at least make your own fun, she'll join! Of course if she "isn't in the mood", whatever, you're having fun anyway, it's her loss.

But consider that you're spending time on being bored and all. What the heck? Find some other thing to do if so.

Or in these kinds of sitautions, I bet it would really help to isolate her and say something like: What's the deal here, we're not having any fun, lets just go to some other place, I bet we'd have much better moments just the two of us. :D

Something along these lines of course. But I'm not sure, I'm just saying, that's what I would do anyway.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top