jnMissouri
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 2, 2014
- Messages
- 793
- Reaction score
- 321
There's an element of push pull that works especially well when dating. But what about in a relationship? To some extent I think it is important to keep this up in a relationship, but within limits, a tone down version. My gf and I had a lot of push and pull on each other the last 8 months. Up and down. Fighting. The threat of loss. Emotional swings of uncertainty. We both got tired of it to some extent. She asked that I stop and I asked that she stop. That was 2-3 weeks ago and our relationship has been MUCH better and more stable. She said she LOVES it this way. Constantly tells me this, wants me to stay sweet (but still calls me an ******* because I tease/neg her, etc.). I've even asked her if she misses the drama, she said WOW NO! I've asked a few times and the answer is always no. She actually tells me she appreciates how I am now and wants me to stay this way. All the problems I was having with her in our relationship faded away when we both dropped this.
That said I am not sure. To some extent the extremes in our arguing, me not filtering what I said when arguing was NOT good. I took it too far and so did she, so I think THAT was a problem. But at the same time I think it's a good idea to have some push and pull in the relationship. Little ways of creating doubt, push and pull.
Do you agree and if so what are some good methods to create this doubt without over doing it? For example, a girl who has been cheated on and has a past with her man not answering the phone all night will trigger some bad stuff for her. So to some extent one has to take these things into consideration.
That said I am not sure. To some extent the extremes in our arguing, me not filtering what I said when arguing was NOT good. I took it too far and so did she, so I think THAT was a problem. But at the same time I think it's a good idea to have some push and pull in the relationship. Little ways of creating doubt, push and pull.
Do you agree and if so what are some good methods to create this doubt without over doing it? For example, a girl who has been cheated on and has a past with her man not answering the phone all night will trigger some bad stuff for her. So to some extent one has to take these things into consideration.