"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Effed up royal...

Johnny Alias

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Oh man. So I went to a party this weekend where 2 plates would be. That was a HUGE mistake. By the end I chose one and the other figured out we went home together. She came to my house and went in through the back deck ready to kick the others ass. I had to hold her by the wrist and restrain her as she hit me and the other hid upstairs. I kept saying I didn't want to call the cops as she would lose her kids if arrested.

This was nuts. She finally calmed down after we tussled for like 20 mins. I tried to get her to sober up in her car. She's been there for me through a ton of crap in my life and I felt bad. Really bad.

Hung out with the first one all day yesterday. She was supposed to go home, put on a dress so we could go out, and then she never came back or even contacted me.

I think I lost them both. Any ideas on what I should do? Yes I'm an idiot. Already reached out to the one who ghosted on me asking if she's okay, but beyond that I'm clueless.

Never go to a party with two plates. Ever. Fair warning.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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MillionBillionaire

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Johnny Alias said:
Oh man. So I went to a party this weekend where 2 plates would be. That was a HUGE mistake. By the end I chose one and the other figured out we went home together. She came to my house and went in through the back deck ready to kick the others ass. I had to hold her by the wrist and restrain her as she hit me and the other hid upstairs. I kept saying I didn't want to call the cops as she would lose her kids if arrested.

This was nuts. She finally calmed down after we tussled for like 20 mins. I tried to get her to sober up in her car. She's been there for me through a ton of crap in my life and I felt bad. Really bad.

Hung out with the first one all day yesterday. She was supposed to go home, put on a dress so we could go out, and then she never came back or even contacted me.

I think I lost them both. Any ideas on what I should do? Yes I'm an idiot. Already reached out to the one who ghosted on me asking if she's okay, but beyond that I'm clueless.

Never go to a party with two plates. Ever. Fair warning.

If you would have called the cops YOU would have gone to jail for "restraining" a woman. It could have been worse.

Why would you be sad about losing a crazy b1tch?
 

VikingKing

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Lol. You'll be alright man. Avoid talking about this subject too either of them ever. Just pretend like this didn't happen, and don't bring the crazy one to social events where you actually know people, if she doesn't know how to pout with out making a huge scene.
 

VikingKing

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MillionBillionaire said:
If you would have called the cops YOU would have gone to jail for "restraining" a woman. It could have been worse.

Why would you be sad about losing a crazy b1tch?
Actually he would not have. He had a witness there that would have testified that she was attacking both of them.
 

MillionBillionaire

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noobolgy said:
Actually he would not have. He had a witness there that would have testified that she was attacking both of them.
I would argue that it depends on the state that you live in. I went to jail for no reason because of a girl in M.N.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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VikingKing

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MillionBillionaire said:
I would argue that it depends in the state that you live in. I went to jail for no reason because of a girl in M.N.
In some states, or even cities, both parties go to jail if there is any alleged physical altercation.
 

TheCWord

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How did you not spin this into a threesome? That's where you effed up...
 

Johnny Alias

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Non crazy said she was just hurting from the rejection and I shouldn't feel bad. Crazy had said it's okay if I'm seeing other chicks... But wasn't prepared to see me seeing another chick right in front of her.

Non crazy is totally MIA. I think crazy might have called her and they agreed I was bad news. **** me.

Thanks for advice given so far. The cop thing could have gone either way probably.

Thing is crazy was a regular thing and non crazy is flaky. Don't know what I was thinking. Damn I effed up.
 

HoneyHitter

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Johnny Alias said:
Non crazy said she was just hurting from the rejection and I shouldn't feel bad. Crazy had said it's okay if I'm seeing other chicks... But wasn't prepared to see me seeing another chick right in front of her.

Non crazy is totally MIA. I think crazy might have called her and they agreed I was bad news. **** me.

Thanks for advice given so far. The cop thing could have gone either way probably.

Thing is crazy was a regular thing and non crazy is flaky. Don't know what I was thinking. Damn I effed up.
Don't worry, man. Just make sure you move on asap. Once a third girl comes in the picture they'll both be scratching their heads.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Johnny Alias

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Yeah I'll get another soon. Already have a few in the works. Never going to bring them to a social setting again. Just creates problems.

Wrote an email to crazy apologizing. I know she went nuts but she was hurt bad. Feel like a total douche. She's been there for me and I know she had feelings for me... Should have just left the party solo or never gone.
 
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