DR: Coffee, venue change, DHV and kino

[muscleman]

Daniel hit the nail on the head. I've been there myself not more than 3 months back. It's like trying too hard to win a woman's approval. If she's on a date with you (and she's not doing it as a bet/out of pity/some other illegit reason), she wants your c0ck. Give it to her!

Well, not so fast.

But you don't have to do ALL THAT. Party isolation would have been ideal - she was pretty much handed to you on a silver plate. You gotta strike while the iron's hot. Two of the latest girls I've been dating I've laid the first night, not more than 3 hours after meeting them. Just be up front about your intentions and blast through that LMR, though it does take the proper amount of rapport/kino/escalation (something that once you do it a few times goes like clockwork).

Don't ever think sex is something a guy earns as a prize; women enjoy it just as much as (and probably more than) men. You don't have to pull off anything crazy to get some tail. If she's attracted to you, you're pretty much in, just don't fart, burp, or pick your nose.

My advice: move on. There is SOME chance you can stil f-close her, but not for a while. Totally cut off all contact. I say this because I'm in the same situation with one of the girls I took out on a few dates: I tried way too hard, but not sexually. In the end she was growing uninterested, saying she had a busy schedule, etc etc, so I cut her off.

I decided to follow up, almost 3 months later, just for kicks (and to get some closure), so I shot her an email. Not 30 minutes go by that she replies that she's very much down for a few drinks and that her schedule is free for the next MONTH!

Best of luck bro.

 

[COD]

I DISAGREE........build the anticipation even further by planning another date then make an excuse a few hours before and hint of a raincheck date.

She will be thinking about you more intensly and the attraction level will build.

I DO AGREE that this chic is ready for sex and is hooked but now that you know that.......make her chase you, don't do what every other guy would do........delay is okay. Build it and she will come to you. Sex is always hotter when chics beg for it. All you gotta do is lead her down the path that she is already on, making her think that it was her idea when in reality your subtleness paved the way. Why rush it, the more you tease the more she will please. Thats how those dudes get chics to buy 'em cars, houses, worship them....its all about tension building.

I 'd say you are at the advance level and have a great understanding of being a true D.J.

I don't think specific tips will help ya, you are beyond that now.....you just need to enhance ever so slightly. Then maybe you could write a book or give advice.....U seem to have a great comprehension level.

I would wish you luck but Luck is for chumps.

 

[lebRambo]

haha, thanks for all the responses guys. I wish more people here would read FRs and DRs and respond objectively.

 

[danielzxc]

hey daniel,

I think you were right dude. Messaged her on wednesday and still no word. Either she lost phone/number or i've been rejected.

Her maybe she's still "sick"

Kinda weird though, cause girls when they reject me normally they would message me but just keep flaking on dates. Meh.

Rejection comes in many forms -- rarely pleasant forms, however.

You know your sh*t man

Fkk oath I do man! Remember, for all the "experts" patting you on the back and telling you she's in the bag, only I predicted the outcome of this one correctly.

 

[lebRambo]

haha, not so fast.

She messaged me and said, you guessed it, that she's 'still sick'. I have never come across this: when i message her she doesnt message back for a day and a half or so. Its not just me, this is just her thing, her friends get frustrated about it too. Whats up with that?

but yeah, you're probably right

 

[danielzxc]

She messaged me and said, you guessed it, that she's 'still sick'. I have never come across this: when i message her she doesnt message back for a day and a half or so. Its not just me, this is just her thing, her friends get frustrated about it too. Whats up with that?

I'm like that myself, actually. Basically it means I dont really give a fkk about the person. It's like "oh man, HIM (her) again... I really can't be stuffed replying to this person's txt, or returning their call". But, eventually i do, 'cos I'd rather just string them along than have them realize I really 't give too much of a shyt. And also, 'cos from my perspective, SOMETIMES I actually DO like these people, so I don't wanna totally lose them. But I do make a lot of excuses for why I didn't get back to them sooner, or why I can't do [thing X] on the weekend. Like, this one girl I used to work with, we went out once, and then she didn't wanna see me anymore, then a year later she contacts me out of the blue. I wanted to see her, but I wasn't that enthusiastic about it, and I was busy with other stuff, so I made up some crap about being in Sydney at the moment, and I'll call you when I get back. I first said I'd be back in a week, and she'd call, so I said another week, call again, one more week, for three weeks.

This may or may not be the way this chick of yours thinks/operates, but this stuff is out there (in the world), so just be aware of it.

 

[lebRambo]

Hey daniel.

One other thing: she seemed pretty keen on the couple of days before the day she flaked. I mean, why plan something and then agree to it and flake out if you never felt like hanging out with the person anyway?

Oh man, so AFC sounding

 

[danielzxc]

I don't fkkn know man, I'm not God!

Lol, nah, seriously, I'm not gonna theorize too much on this one (I mean, on that particular case). We humans can be really weird sometimes. Like, the other day I was at this clothing store, right. And I'm trying on all this stuff, and a couple of pieces I give the assistant the impression that I really like them and that I'll be buying them. In fact, while I was in the changing room I think even said that I'll "grab this one" about some top I had on. Well, between the time I said that and the time I walked out, I had changed my mind, and I threw the stuff on the counter and I go to the assistant, who no doubt had thought he had racked up a sale, "mate, I changed my mind, I'm gonna have to think about it" (which every sales person knows means you are NOT gonna think about it, you don't want it) and I walked out. Surely this guy was thinking wtf? Fact is, internally, I was much less enthusiastic about what I was trying on than the external impression I gave. I guess this can happen in a lot of other areas of life too... like going out with people. It's possible a similar thing happened with this chick. For reasons known only to herself she gave you the IMPRESSION that she was really into it, but internally she was in two minds, and when it came to the crunch, when there was the distinct possibility that you would try and FKK her (like comgin over to your place), she made a decision and went the other way. (Hmm, there you go, I DID theorize... just can't help myself, lol)

And it's only "AFC" if you're gonna pout over it and bring it up every time someone talks about girls, like your the ONLY guy that ever got flaked on. But if you just wanna understand a general PRINCIPLE, that's not a bad thing at all, 'cos it can help you for next time. I really don't know for sure whether my above little theory has that much substance to it, or if there's a better explanation. But I think there's SOMETHING like that to it.

Anyway, I guess the important thing to realize out of it is to always "expect the unexpected". Well, actually, not to EXPECT it, 'cos then you're always gonna be worried. But just be prepared that something totally unexpected and contrary to impressions can occur. That way, if it DOES, it doesn't totally throw you off and demoralize you.

YOU should be pretty fit to handle things in this way, 'cos as you say, you embrace a spirit of adventure when it come to this shyt. This is just another of those things that you don't really know how they're gonna turn out, so it's best to maintain that spirit right until the point where you're actually fkking her (by which time you DO know). I've been thinking a lot about this since you wrote it in my thread. It's DEF something that i need to work into my own outlook. I like to plan and budget stuff a LOT, and I like working to routines. I always feel like life throws enough variety at you without you needing to go looking for it, so I try to "control" outcomes as much as i can, so I can "forecast" what's gonna be happening in the future. Thing is, with chicks, the idea that you can "control" anything is insane, and a recipe for frustration. I think this is one reason why even only slighly 'negative' outcomes get me so flustered, and why avoid approaching like I avoid the plague. When things are so difficult to control that they are virtually impossible to, a better way to approach them is with this adventurous spirit of 'who knows what's gonna happen?' For you, just maintain that spirit until you're blowing your load.

 

[Jay Jay]

LebRambo.

You're thinking too much. Analysing too much.

Chill bro. You were doing fine until you started thinking about it too much.

JJ

 

[danielzxc]

LebRambo.

You're thinking too much. Analysing too much.

Chill bro. You were doing fine until you started thinking about it too much.

No dkkhead, no he wasn't.

Go back and read the fkkng report moron.

He was not doing fine. If he was doing fine, she wouldn't have flaked, you spastic. It wasn't his "analysing" that made her flake on him -- how the fkk could SHE know if he was thinking too much or not?

I think you are just trying to cover up for your massive misjudgement of what was going on, pumping his ass full of sunshine about how "great" he's doing.

You know what, I was always suspicious of your BS, and I think you've just proven you're FOS.

 

[Jay Jay]

No dkkhead, no he wasn't.

Go back and read the fkkng report moron.

He was not doing fine. If he was doing fine, she wouldn't have flaked, you spastic. It wasn't his "analysing" that made her flake on him -- how the fkk could SHE know if he was thinking too much or not?

I think you are just trying to cover up for your massive misjudgement of what was going on, pumping his ass full of sunshine about how "great" he's doing.

You know what, I was always suspicious of your BS, and I think you've just proven you're FOS.

Be nice now!

Dude, my only posts to this so far has been after one date. My call was spot on.

I also told Leb to try to get physical. I then told him to trust his instincts.

Instead he started to listen to your negativity.

I think you need to worry about your own **** instead of telling other people they ****ed up.

JJ

 

[lebRambo]

boys, boys! theres no need to fight over me!

hahahaha!

anyway, it doesnt matter either way, cause neither of you nor I have enough evidence for either argument. Only she knows. To hell with it, its not worth getting worked up over. Since when do we let a b!tch get us down, let alone get us all angry at each other?

 

[danielzxc]

Dude, my only posts to this so far has been after one date. My call was spot on.

Acutally, you're right. I take that back.

Instead he started to listen to your negativity.

(a) by the time I posted, he'd already had his 2nd date. Surely whatever *I* said to him couldn't have made any difference to what SHE thought, because they neve saw each other again after the 2nd date. Whether Rambo was overanalysing or not doesn't even matter, because SHE would have known nothing about it.

(b) I wasn't just pouring on the negativity. I was doing my best to be objective. Some people, apparently, see that as being "negative". Personally, I would MUCH rather be made aware of possible mistakes and areas for improvement than to be told how great I am. (Not that the latter hurts, but give me the objective info first. Kinda like how The Godfather (Don Corleone) insists on hearing bad news right away. )

I think you need to worry about your own **** instead of telling other people they ****ed up.

Actually, i agree with you. I still like to help when I can though. (Helping others helps make YOU better, too, btw. Were you aware of that?)

Btw, though, out of the two of us, I fully admit I have a big problem. You on the other hand seem to think you're already a master. What's your excuse for being on this site?

boys, boys! theres no need to fight over me!

Yes there is! I want you all for myself! I'm not sharing you with Gay Jay!

 

[lebRambo]

haha, dude I must be getting really ****y. Today I found myself thinking..."wtf? HB21st rejected ME? ME?!!?!"

 

[Jay Jay]

Acutally, you're right. I take that back.



(a) by the time I posted, he'd already had his 2nd date. Surely whatever *I* said to him couldn't have made any difference to what SHE thought, because they neve saw each other again after the 2nd date. Whether Rambo was overanalysing or not doesn't even matter, because SHE would have known nothing about it.

(b) I wasn't just pouring on the negativity. I was doing my best to be objective. Some people, apparently, see that as being "negative". Personally, I would MUCH rather be made aware of possible mistakes and areas for improvement than to be told how great I am. (Not that the latter hurts, but give me the objective info first. Kinda like how The Godfather (Don Corleone) insists on hearing bad news right away. )



Actually, i agree with you. I still like to help when I can though. (Helping others helps make YOU better, too, btw. Were you aware of that?)

Btw, though, out of the two of us, I fully admit I have a big problem. You on the other hand seem to think you're already a master. What's your excuse for being on this site?



Yes there is! I want you all for myself! I'm not sharing you with Gay Jay!

Touching on your points.

Full respect for your retraction and your controlled and thoughtful refutation. Much better at getting your point across then calling people names.

I try to encourage people positively. If you feel confident you are more likely to take positive action. Taking action is a victory! Once you have taken action you will be more likely to do it again regardless of if you win or lose.

People really put too much thought into this. Really its pretty simple, guys want *****, girls want ****. Too many salesmen have complicated the matter and made something that is totally natural to seem like rocket science.

As for our problems. Yours first.

Sorry for being harsh, but I hoped to piss you off so much that you went and took action.

Yes your problem is much simpler than mine.

Which brings me to my excuse.

Well firstly let me say a few things.

If I come across as thinking I'm a master I apologise. But I do know I'm a hell of a lot more experienced and skilled then most guys here. I'm 30, been engaged, had twelve serious LTR, dated dozens of women. And everyone of those women are happy to see me when we bump into each other. And I only go out with ****ing hot chicks!

I can approach (actually I prefer to call it open) pretty easily now. I can charm the socks off most people (not just women) and I have my **** together when it comes to sex.

I've been round the block, had great ups and downs. I have done things in my life to ME is the pinnacle of success. I am happy.

There are at least three girls I could call right now (or actually when I finish work) who would be happy to give me some lovin.

I only post from work, I only try to post positive things, jokes, real advice or insults at the misogynists.

My problem.

I haven't been happy with a woman since my last serios LTR had to return to her nation of origin coz her visa ran out. The girls that I want slip through my fingers. The girls I land **** me. I'm sick of the ****ing game but can't escape it.

So I'm trying to figure out what the prob is.

Peace bro.

JJ


p.s Gay Jay LOL!

 

[danielzxc]

haha, dude I must be getting really ****y. Today I found myself thinking..."wtf? HB21st rejected ME? ME?!!?!"

Excellent!

Man, I know what you mean. I have felt this way about rejections I have gotten in the past too. It's like, "WHATTT??? YOU are rejecting ME?!?? You fkkn stuuuuupid bytch..." (in the you-don't-know-what-you're-missing and you'll-never-do-as-good-as-me-again sense).

Thing is, I've only felt this way when rejected after I'd already seen her or been with her. Eg, I get a txt saying, "I've been thinking... I don't really think it's a good idea that we see each other again..."

If only I could feel this way in APPROACH rejections, mate, I would kick ass almightily!

p.s Gay Jay LOL!

Yeah I liked it too.

Okay man, peace. That's a very different problem you've got. My first impression was that you're just making up stories to get an 'e-rep'. Apologies for the misunderstanding.

I replied to the points you made on my thread, btw. If you're feeling generous with some of that "positivity", feel free to splurge some on me. Oh, and ignore, some of the jabs I stil take at you in that reply. Call it water under the bridge.

ps -- I was about to write "apology accepted". I did that to a chick once in a spat similar to (but then again, quite different from) this one. Of course, she didn't feel like she was apologizing at all (just as you yourself were not), and went balistic at me. Rofl. Fkk it was funny.