"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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dont you want somebody to love?

nilescrane

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It's normal to want a compatible woman, but like my friend has always told me, you have to be happy, single or in a relationship, sex or no sex.

My problem is that I can't relate in the long term to most women. I don't party, go to clubs and I don't need a lot of social attention. My interests are nostalgic (Classic rock and 90s sitcoms like Seinfeld and Frasier) and while I'm not a homebody, I don't mind staying in unless it involves going out to eat or hearing a good band or going to a new area (vacation.)

On top of that, I have a very distinct personality. I'm kind of a "tell it like it is" and "say what's on my mind" kind of guy. Like a girl I was dating, when we first met, she asked me why I haven't dated much, I said "I guess I was waiting for Heather Graham, Catherine Bell, or Winona Ryder or something." She said "Did you make yourself a blow up doll and call it Winona Graham Bell?" I love that kind of sarcasm in a woman, and I like being honest abouat myself without being too honest (i.e not talking about too much personal info or sounding too serious.)

I don't mesh well with generic women. There are safe things to talk about with any woman...favorite movies, what you like to do for fun, but in my limited dating experience, after a while that won't cut it. It's more about having a common interest or two and meshing well and having good conversation.

In the meantime, I would like to have sex with some women my age (mid 20s) as well as maybe hang out with and have sex with attractive older women...that way I can also talk to them about my nostalgic interests.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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nismo-4

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KontrollerX said:
See the animal in his cage that you built,
Are you sure what side you're on?
Better not look him too closely in the eye,
Are you sure what side of the glass you are on?
See the safety of the life you have built,
Everything where it belongs
Feel the hollowness inside of your heart,
And it's all... right where it belongs

What if everything around you,
Isn't quite as it seems?
What if all the world you think you know,
Is an elaborate dream?
And if you look at your reflection,
Is it all you want it to be?
What if you could look right through the cracks,
Would you find yourself... find yourself afraid to see?

What if all the world's inside of your head?
Just creations of your own
Your devils and your gods all the living and the dead
And you're really all alone
You can live in this illusion,
You can choose to believe
You keep looking but you can't find the words,
Are you hiding in retreat?

What if everything around you,
Isn't quite as it seems?
What if all the world you used to know,
Is an elaborate dream?
And if you look at your reflection,
Is that all you want to be?
What if you could look right through the cracks,
Would you find yourself... find yourself afraid to see?
ROTFL!!!

Rep for you! How true this is! How the hell do you find this stuff?
 

nismo-4

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Phenomenal One said:
God this thread is a joke

I'd consider the OP's question if it did'nt come from a place of : in a relationship = good, not in a realtionship = bad.

If i wanted to hear how i should be in a relationship and how bad just f*ckin a bunch of woman was i'd listen to my mother.
It is not advisable to take relationship and dating advice from a woman, even your own mother.

To the OP, you should consider moving to or visiting a society where your woman will wash your balls at night if she is starving during the day.
 

Danton1975

Don Juan
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I find a relationship far more fullfilling than ONS. A relationship with the right woman can literally turn on all your attraction swicthes. I feel that way about my relationship with my GF of 4 years. We are just coming up on the 4th year mark and I find I am enjoying her more now than even before when we were courting each other in the beggining. I think this forum is mostly geared to having sex with a woman but gives very little advice in holding a relationship which in my opinion is the tougher part, because getting a woman should not be that hard in US.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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DonJuan11

Master Don Juan
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Lexington said:
You're making a huge mistake if you think that a woman can fill a "hole" in your life. It means that not everything is right with you just yet. A woman should only be an icing on the cake. You should be able to have a perfectly happy, fulfilling life without a woman.

A woman shouldn't be the end all and be all, but you can't live a happy and fulfilling life if you don't know how to relate to the opposite sex. The flip side could be if you have a woman you could live and happy and fulfilling life.

If you try to fill that hole with a woman, you're in for a major disappointment. Nothing can fill that hole but you. And believe me, I think most men can relate to what you're feeling. I can too. I haven't filled that hole yet myself. But now I realize that women, drugs, religion, money, a career can't do the trick.

Women so much can't fill the hole, but to find a woman and perhaps get married to her will be much easier the younger you are. Everything else can be obtained at an older age, money, cars, houses, cooking classes, but the right woman cannot. They are part of a process, but have to be part of it alot sooner than later


As it turns out, when you are content with your life and you don't need a woman to complete you, that's when you will be most attractive to women and best positioned for a fulfilling relationship.

These forums aren't about filling a hole in your life. What they do teach you is how to play the game so that you can find the right woman for you and not have to settle for the one you were able to get only by chance.
You have a point but you are putting too much emphasis on not finding a woman to complete your life. These forums are about improving yourself to make it more attractive to the opposite sex, but you also have to put in solid and consistent effort with woman to get what you want.
 
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