Don't let this stuff consume you.

[logicallefty]

This is what I'm having trouble with now. Finding the balance and trying not to overanalyse things.

I'm learning to only take what I need from this site and to focus on the fundamentals.

The way I handle it, and this is just me.. I go 15% beta 85% alpha, if you want it in those terms that most of us can stipulate on.

You MUST Establish that:

- You are your own man

- You run your own life

- You do not NEED her but you WANT her

- You respect her and others but there will be no walking all over you and you will stop it instantly if you so much as see it coming from 1000 miles away

- You take "hers" and others' input into objective consideration but ultimately make your own decisions and your decision are final unless there is an over abundance of evidence to make you change your mind

- You don't tolerate disrespect from anyone and especially not from her

- You do much much more leading than following

On the other hand, I see it as OK to do these things below so long as she has been doing things to please you and show you respect:

- ONCE IN A WHILE Let her make decisions for the both of you like where to go, what to eat, what movie to see, etc. so long as she has been showing you respect recently

- ONCE IN A WHILE buy her a gift

- ONCE IN A WHILE call her "beautiful" or some other slimy comment like that

- ONCE IN A WHILE get up out of your chair and do something she directly asks you to do.


Hope this helps.

 

[Slickster]

I don't know... can this really be Squirrel's wife?

After all the sh!t squirrel's posted here I doubt it.