Don't beat yourself up or get upset when she seems friendlier to "lesser" men

[yellowstoneman2012]

She could be a little intimidated=attracted

Case in point tonight:

I belong to one of those meetup groups that is quite large, but the one event I go to is the monthly meet/greet located in a hip town about 35 minutes north of me. Usually, the guy to gal ratio is not good (about 70/30 or 2/1). A large amount of the guys as well are not that physically attractive or socially awkward so the competition is not too bad.

Anyhow, one of the female event organizers is a solid "7" and has a bubbly personality. I have briefly talked to her before on two seperate occasions at some of the other meetups in the months past.

The bar (we were outside) was very loud and I noticed she passed me a couple of times without even making eye contact, but yet she was going up to other guys (less attractive than me) and making small talk with them, being friendly to them. Yet, she was ignoring me?

This had me bummed out a little bit and when she later passed by my direction again I initiated a hi to her, clicked drinks, made a quick joke with her and talked to her maybe 15 seconds as she made her way by. I said to myself that I did my part and trying to follow her around and talk to her again would make me look silly. (Women don't like to be chased)

Anyhow, is there is a chance that perhaps there is something about me that she does not like and her "cold shoulder" was on purpose? Absolutely

Or..,..

She finds me attractive, and I intimidate her, hence the "cold shoulder."

Think about it? It's easier to talk/laugh/joke around and be yourself around a female or group of females that you are not attracted to? Why?

You don't give a damn what they think of you from a romantic standpoint and there is no pressure so they are easier to talk to than attractive women.

I would think women would be no different. She is being "friendlier" and more open to these other guys because she is not attracted/intimidated by them.

Thoughts?

 

[CyrusTheGreat]

Maybe, maybe not. You won't ever know until you ask her out. Stop wasting your time on such details

 

[Michael Chief]

She is an event organizer. This means she has decent social skills. This means she isn't some awkward anime tsundere girl who ignores people she likes. What you're describing is what a teenage boy with no dating experience would do, and certainly not something that a bubbly woman would do.

Also, you say that those other guys are less attractive than you, but the attractiveness of a man's appearance in a woman's eyes varies wildly from woman to woman. It's entirely possible that she feels attraction to some of the men that you think are unattractive.

With all that being said, though, you can still shoot your shot. Just don't overthink the small details.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

She is an event organizer. This means she has decent social skills. This means she isn't some awkward anime tsundere girl who ignores people she likes. What you're describing is what a teenage boy with no dating experience would do, and certainly not something that a bubbly woman would do.

Also, you say that those other guys are less attractive than you, but the attractiveness of a man's appearance in a woman's eyes varies wildly from woman to woman. It's entirely possible that she feels attraction to some of the men that you think are unattractive.

With all that being said, though, you can still shoot your shot. Just don't overthink the small details.

yep. Having been similar to an ‘event organizer’. One has to include everyone. Nog just the hotties.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Ask yourself this: if a guy is "ignoring" a woman in a social setting, is it because he isn't interested or because he's intimated? The answer is maybe. Same deal with women. Life would be a heck of a lot easier if people were straightforward. But they aren't.

 

[Ricky]

she could be running game where she shows you less attention because she is interested in you and shows more attention to the less interesting guys.

it seems to be working on you, right?

 

[RazorRambo24]

This is why it sucks to be "in your head" about things. You automatically assumed that the organizer of an event was single and looking-- instead of realizing she might just be overseeing her event and having conversations with people who probably seem open to socializing.. while you might have by the sounds of it just been standing awkwardly around and not looking very friendly or sociable, while everyone's busy socializing.. The way you wrote this seems that way..

Your story and the title you chose makes you seem out of touch. "lesser men" while you stand around awkwardly in your head the whole time thinking about the organizer.. whiel everyone else is socializing...

I'm not trying to be harsh but dude. This sounds silly

 

[oc16]

This is why it sucks to be "in your head" about things. You automatically assumed that the organizer of an event was single and looking-- instead of realizing she might just be overseeing her event and having conversations with people who probably seem open to socializing.. while you might have by the sounds of it just been standing awkwardly around and not looking very friendly or sociable, while everyone's busy socializing.. The way you wrote this seems that way..

Your story and the title you chose makes you seem out of touch. "lesser men" while you stand around awkwardly in your head the whole time thinking about the organizer.. whiel everyone else is socializing...

I'm not trying to be harsh but dude. This sounds silly

Btw, i wasn't standing around by myself, I was talking in a group setting with two guys and two girls.

 

[RazorRambo24]

Btw, i wasn't standing around by myself, I was talking in a group setting with two guys and two girls.

Then you cant be wondering why she didnt come talk to you.. do you think the other two guys or two girls thought the same? Or did she talk to them?

I think you gave yourself way too much self importance here. Plus she eventually did say hi as she passed by.