"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Don Juans vs Agrophobia

K2000kidd

Senior Don Juan
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My friend Dave has a decent social circle
and recently met this girl who is really into him
He believes he suffers agrophobia and thinks
it may really become a problem dating her.

One on one he's OK and a few people over the house is cool
but mention clubs, amusement parks, concerts, ball games or basically anywhere there might be a crowd he goes into
"aww i'll probably just play COD or rent something off netflix" mode

He don't do bars and barely leaves his house other than work and errands
I don't know any single woman who is down with sitting home to
watch movies on a friday or saturday night.

any advice??
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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premierxxx

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I'm no Doc and not familiar with disorder but, obviously making him aware of disorder is a first step. Then through slow exposure to different places I bet he can over come it.

Does your buddy smoke marijuana?


Sometimes this herb can help, other times it can make symptoms worst. He should give it a try. Idea is to smoke is no often than twice a week, and use the drug time for introspection. That's what helps, you're able to discover yourself more than you otherwise are capable.



Now what makes you think it's acrophobia? Could it be that he just wants alone time for himself for whatever he does alone by himself?
 

3countriesPlan

Master Don Juan
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hermititius... ya I get that too on occasion.. tell him to think about how nice its going to be boning that chick in a dark alley behind a club , amusement park, or concert and he should be able to turn off his shyness.. maybe he is really tuned into the DJ mindset and wants isolation on *****hes
good luck
at worst he can just have hoes watching netflix while they bobbing their heads in his pad
 

WaterTiger

Master Don Juan
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Will a party girl from the local club want to sit at home & watch netflicks movies? No way! So find him a different kind of girl.

Go to a gaming store and let him pick up a girl that likes playing "Left For Dead" for hours on end! :rockon:

Go to the library and find a chick who's majoring in Russian Lit.:crazy:

Clubs and crowds aren't the only place to find girls.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Mr_rogers

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Sounds more like a case of social anxiety disorder than anything. Agoraphobics are literally terrified to venture out of their homes for any reason including work, errands and all that. Sounds like your buddy is just anxious around large groups of people that he's not familiar with. The reason he's okay at his house is because his home is familiar to him and he feels more or less like he's in control.

The best way to combat social anxiety disorder is the "baby steps" method. He needs to get out of the house and out of his comfort zone. Start him off at a place like a coffee shop at a fairly busy hour and gradually work up to more and more crowded places. It'll be scary for him at first, but the general idea is to slowly desensitize him until the anxiety he feels is manageable and then gone altogether.
 
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