"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Does the Two Strike Rule Apply here?

bigneil

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(Rare non-stripper thread).

I saw a hot girl at work (different companies, same building) in the elevator in January. Pretty enough that you could lose yourself for a moment if you stared too long.

A week later we crossed paths and she smiled and held eye contact continuously for about 20 feet. Good sign for sure.

A week after that I walked up to her and said "I always see you but don't know your name…" and she extended her hand to me faster than Dirty Harry pulls a 45. She told me her name and (more importantly) she asked me my name.

A few weeks went by and then I saw her again this week:

0) Me: It's been a while since I've seen you.
1) Her: I know! So where do you work?
2) Me: 9th floor.
3) Her: (strong eye contact)
4) Me: Are you single?
5) Her: Yes!
6): Me: We should get lunch (thinking I'm in like Flynn at that point).
7): Her: (Smiling) Hmm.... I don't know.
8): Me: Of course you do! (I was shocked!)
9): Her: I just got out of a relationship.
10): Me: Who said anything about a relationship?
11): Her: Hmm…
12): Me: So you’ll send me a text message then?
13) Her: I'm not sure.
14) Me: Of course you are. (Eye contact the whole time).
15): Her: How old are you?
16): Me: I’m 41. But you didn’t think I was 41.
17) Her: (Staring and smiling).
18) Me: Why, is that too old for you?
19): Her: (Looking about 30 and rubbing her chin nods) Yes... but you ARE a really nice man...
29): Me: (Laughing, turning and walking) It was nice to see you again (Ouch, she said the word "nice").

In hindsight, it felt good overall. Her words said no but her eyes said yes.

So the next day who did I end up with alone in the elevator? Her. She told me she couldn't wait for the weekend and I asked what her plans were and she said it's her mom's birthday and she's traveling to (her hometown). She got off after 2 floors.

Should the two strike rule be applied here?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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loveshogun

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BigNeil,

This thread sounds a lot like you're looking for validation.

We already know that you know your stuff well enough, but I feel like pride is still a huge factor in your decision-making process, and that's never a good thing.

If she wants to play, she'll let you know. She clearly declined the first time, and there may be a million reasons why, but the only reason you're wondering about any of this is because your pride might get hurt.
 

nightcrawler

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bigneil said:
(Rare non-stripper thread).

I saw a hot girl at work (different companies, same building) in the elevator in January. Pretty enough that you could lose yourself for a moment if you stared too long.

A week later we crossed paths and she smiled and held eye contact continuously for about 20 feet. Good sign for sure.

A week after that I walked up to her and said "I always see you but don't know your name…" and she extended her hand to me faster than Dirty Harry pulls a 45. She told me her name and (more importantly) she asked me my name.

A few weeks went by and then I saw her again this week:

0) Me: It's been a while since I've seen you.
1) Her: I know! So where do you work?
2) Me: 9th floor.
3) Her: (strong eye contact)
4) Me: Are you single?
5) Her: Yes!
6): Me: We should get lunch (thinking I'm in like Flynn at that point).
7): Her: (Smiling) Hmm.... I don't know.
8): Me: Of course you do! (I was shocked!)
9): Her: I just got out of a relationship.
10): Me: Who said anything about a relationship?
11): Her: Hmm…
12): Me: So you’ll send me a text message then?
13) Her: I'm not sure.
14) Me: Of course you are. (Eye contact the whole time).
15): Her: How old are you?
16): Me: I’m 41. But you didn’t think I was 41.
17) Her: (Staring and smiling).
18) Me: Why, is that too old for you?
19): Her: (Looking about 30 and rubbing her chin nods) Yes... but you ARE a really nice man...
29): Me: (Laughing, turning and walking) It was nice to see you again (Ouch, she said the word "nice").

In hindsight, it felt good overall. Her words said no but her eyes said yes.

So the next day who did I end up with alone in the elevator? Her. She told me she couldn't wait for the weekend and I asked what her plans were and she said it's her mom's birthday and she's traveling to (her hometown). She got off after 2 floors.

Should the two strike rule be applied here?
your problem is that you're interested in getting a date with her.

you should be interested in HER..not getting a date.

when she said she just got out of a relationship...this was the perfect opportunity find out info...but instead you kept insisting on a "date"

why would anyone wanna go on a date with someone they have no bond to?
 

zekko

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I guess Nightcrawler is saying you should have built more attraction, comfort, and rapport with her first.

I don't think the two strike rule applies here because it was all in one interaction. Let her get used to the idea before you write her off completely.

Odd for that attractive a 30 year old to be running around unattached like that.
 

bigneil

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By two strike rule, I meant I was shot down the first time (strike one), and wondered if it's salvagable for another try.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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