Does spinning plates ever really cure oneitis?

[skinnyguy]

It usually does for me. I had a oneitis for about 6-7 months. Took her out to dinner, tolerated not getting fvcked by her. She sorta took advantage and I blocked her on everything. I felt bummed until I started dating other women. Now, I realize what scum she is. She's fvcking trash that I should have never even messed with. I don't need to date some broke Latina who needs to rely on men to get by. @wifehunter is more or less right. if the woman was trash to begin with, you'll soon realize it and get over her.

 

[zekko]

Does spinning plates really ever cure oneitis or is it just a Band-Aid

The guys who advocate spinning plates the most will tell you that if you are not spinning plates then you are vulnerable, so I would say spinning plates isn't a cure for anything. But it's a good dating strategy, if that's what you want to do. Oneitis will go away on its own with time, but as has been said, if you can go bang a hotter girl that usually helps. Problem is, if you have oneitis, you probably think that girl is the hottest.

If you have the proper mindset and an abundance mentality, it shouldn't matter whether or not you are spinning plates. But perhaps if you haven't developed that mindset yet, spinning plates can help develop it.

 

[lamath]

Good stuff

I agree, however this is rare af.
From my experience women willl find the smallest reason to ***** about or be unhappy.

It will start real small almost like they are not complaining or bitching, it make it harder for us to adjust because every thing we do will be seen as over reacting, this is where actions are better than word.

 

[Dash Riprock]

If you have the proper mindset and an abundance mentality, it shouldn't matter whether or not you are spinning plates. But perhaps if you haven't developed that mindset yet, spinning plates can help develop it.

This.

You CAN have the abundance mentality WITHOUT dating/spinning 4-5 women at a time. I mean, it's f*ucking exhausting. I've tried it. I just have way too many other interests that take up a lot of time plus I own a multi-state business. I'll date 1-2 at a time, tops. Most don't get by the first or second date anyway so I always have a fresh crop coming in. BUT, I see women as the small dollop of mashed potatoes on a huge Thanksgiving dinner plate loaded with food. Certainly not the "meat" or main course, but just there to compliment my dinner.

The WORST thing a man can do in his life is base his success as a man and set his primary goal as/on the approval and acceptance of one woman.

 

[SeekerOfTheWay]

Oneitis is a self esteem killer for me. it makes me behave in pathetic ways that aren’t really “me.” i never heard it labeled this until these boards, i have always thought of it as “obsessing” on one person. it may be worse for females though because our imaginations run wild. the advice here is good and i find i have to push myself to do those things to stop focusing on that one person. hobbies, concerts, yoga, anything that refocuses the mind. what i am doing now is just remembering to focus on myself, my health and fitness and having fun and well being. taking a “step back” metaphorically and looking at the big picture. the person i am focusing unhealthily on may not even matter to me in 3 months, so stop making mountains out of molehills. i think both genders get caught up in this and the person of focus never finds it attractive and it repulses them and makes us less appealing.

 

[SeekerOfTheWay]

90 days? You could pull it off in 60 and you know it. If i had a Vajayjay i would definitely be a spinner. Probably a manipulative sneaky one too. Oneitis would be easy to conquer.

yes, we can spin easier but remember chicks are different than you. we often time need to feel emotionally connected to our “plates” or partners. i wish it wasn't so because it would be better for me if i could just date someone harder to forget about the one i am focusing on. but our brains aren’t wired that way. i also think (no science to back up) that females tend to be more obsessive than males.

 

[zekko]

The WORST thing a man can do in his life is base his success as a man and set his primary goal as/on the approval and acceptance of one woman.

I agree with your statement, but I get the impression there are guys here who base their success as men on the approval and acceptance of multiple women.

 

[Epic Days]

We as DJ's are advised to spin plates at all times, but is it simply running away from ever truly connecting with anyone?

Does spinning plates really ever cure oneitis or is it just a Band-Aid of denying the pain and longing to have connected to that one chick?

Pretty good question. Spinning plates should be the end result. Not the drive or impetus. Otherwise it’s just a hack to not get key holed.

I love a great connection. That should always be the goal. Otherwise I really don’t see the point. But then, I can have a deep connection and absolutely NOT fall “in love”. This is because of how I think.

If you are afraid of a connection because you can’t trust yourself to feel really close to her and still opt out in a heartbeat, you haven’t changed anything. You still think the way you do. Inside, you are still a cuck-to-be. You can have the best game in the world but still get moved into the land of hopeless appeaser because you are afraid of loss. Despite the truth that you wouldn’t loose anything. Embrace the suck. Unlearn what you have learned since birth.

 

[Dash Riprock]

I agree with your statement, but I get the impression there are guys here who base their success as men on the approval and acceptance of multiple women.

I will admit, it's fun to f*uck a new girl every 2 weeks or so, but it doesn't define me.

 

[corrector]

Don't recall having an oneitis on anyone since 2017. Buying a 58 inch HD-TV and 8 inch Tablet and watching content on them, etc... seemed to have distracted me out of having oneitis over anyone. There is a backlog of a bunch of things I want to watch as well since I'm also too busy for that.

 

[zekko]

Don't recall having an oneitis on anyone since 2017. Buying a 58 inch HD-TV and 8 inch Tablet and watching content on them, etc... seemed to have distracted me out of having oneitis over anyone.

Lol, I never had you pegged for the materialistic type.

 

[corrector]

Lol, I never had you pegged for the materialistic type.

How is that materialistic? I didn't buy a 75 inch 4k TV. 2k(HD) is considered an old tech today.

 

[zekko]

How is that materialistic? I didn't buy a 75 inch 4k TV. 2k(HD) is considered an old tech today.

It could be a two inch TV, it's still a material object.

I remember when my parents got our first color television. Before that we always had black and white.

 

[corrector]

It could be a two inch TV, it's still a material object.

I remember when my parents got our first color television. Before that we always had black and white.

In those times you had home use projectors (8 mm / 16 mm) if you wanted to see larger images at home. I used to rent a 16 mm projector and borrow 16 mm film from the local library. The TVs of today (and digital projectors) have replaced that technology. Think the library got rid of it's 16 mm and 8 mm stock a couple decades ago.

 

[zekko]

Think the library got rid of it's 16 mm and 8 mm stock a couple decades ago.

I'm still trying to figure out what to do with my encyclopedias. Maybe I'll keep them for the apocalypse.

I used to think those 16mm films and projectors were cool, but I never got to have or rent one. They also used to have those big color TVs that were projected from the rear, with the three colors.

 

[corrector]

I'm still trying to figure out what to do with my encyclopedias. Maybe I'll keep them for the apocalypse.

I used to think those 16mm films and projectors were cool, but I never got to have or rent one. They also used to have those big color TVs that were projected from the rear, with the three colors.

I got rid of mine back in 2017. Gave them away to an inquisitive guy who saw the truck full of items we planned to toss to the garbage dump.

16 mm projectors were mainly used in schools to show documentaries and childrens movies. Libraries had very little "cinema movies" in their collection, but when they had it then it was like a treat (ie. Star Wars or Back to the Future). A family friend had 16 mm projector at their home and then one thing led to another and in December 1987 I started a 16 mm film hobby with Charlotte's Web (1973), and other films.

Haven't heard of big colour TV with rare projection. However, in a kid's mind, a 16 mm was simply more fun to operate and made me feel like I had a special skill to operate a projector, whereas my peers would not be comfortable with that. This is the late 80s so the V.H.S. tape was very popular and the 16mm/8mm were outmoded back then. Just holding on to the reels of film, looking at each individual frame, performations, seeing it start with a certain colour tape and end with the standard red tape before the reel is empty, rewinding it, the smell of the celloid inside the reels, watching the front reel get empty while the rare reel fills up and then rewinding it, and hearing that mechanical low-hum white noise of the projector and fan as the film is projected at 24 frames per second, was all part of the magical experience. V.H.S. tapes were too boring in comparison. The reels were heavy though. I had to get a duffel bag to transport them. A feature length movie is 4 large reels. The reels were all expensive. A single movie could cost upwards of several thousand dollars in that format (possibly more today adjusted to inflation).

 

[zekko]

Haven't heard of big colour TV with rare projection.

I'm surprised you don't remember them. Back then about the only way to get a large screen TV was with the rear projection. They didn't make 50" cathode ray tubes lol. The problem back then was the resolution being broadcast wasn't that great, so those large screen TVs tended to look a little fuzzy.

I remember they used to sell 8mm films in the ads of the Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine. They were about 15 minutes long and were like a highlight reel of popular horror and scifi movies. So you didn't get the whole movie, you'd get like a 15 minute version of Dracula or whatever. But you could own them, so I thought they were pretty cool. Never actually got any though.

 

[corrector]

I'm surprised you don't remember them. Back then about the only way to get a large screen TV was with the rear projection. They didn't make 50" cathode ray tubes lol. The problem back then was the resolution being broadcast wasn't that great, so those large screen TVs tended to look a little fuzzy.

Come to think of it, I do remember video projectors. What I meant to say, is that in the late-80s, I rejected anything almost that wasn't 16mm because I got obsessed with that medium. Videos were like an abomination because they weren't the real thing, while moving pictures from a mechanical 16 mm were. It took until 1992 for that obsession to really get out of my system.

Nowadays, VHS tapes are seeing in a Nostalgic light because they are as ancient as 16 mm was ancient in the late 80s. I don't mind viewing things on DVD/Blu-Ray/or Streaming and as of recently. I do find it interesting that some major film directors, like Quentin Tarintino, were unhappy at the transition of film to digital in cinemas in the mid to late 00s and reminded a bit of how I felt about V.H.S. tapes vs 16 mms in the late 80s

I remember they used to sell 8mm films in the ads of the Famous Monsters of Filmland magazine. They were about 15 minutes long and were like a highlight reel of popular horror and scifi movies. So you didn't get the whole movie, you'd get like a 15 minute version of Dracula or whatever. But you could own them, so I thought they were pretty cool. Never actually got any though.

This is interesting. I did view 8 mm movies as well, but only one library in town had them. I saw Jaws, Airplane, The Jerk (1979) that featured Steve Martin walking over dog poo after asking what it was, and a number of movies in that format. As the projector and reels were smaller and lighter it was a more relaxed experience than the 16 mm. However, being the late 80s, most of the 8 mm selection was old feature movies (i.e. nothing recent say like the past 2-3 years).

 

[Hal9000]

I've found that having multiple women in your life makes it very difficult for any one of them to ever infect me with "oneitis". Basically she would have to be amazing in just about every way for me to even consider giving up my current reality whereas if I was sitting around alone all the time it might be far easier to nail me down.