You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
She is already sending me texts she must be bugged about that coffee date but she didn't ask me about it directly so I don't plan on mentioning I nixed it.Francisco d'Anconia said:
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Absolutely true. :yes:evelsteve said:
All we have is time remaining, so let's make it PUA time, not AFC time!evelsteve said:Thanks,Francisco. And furthermore, think about all the precious TIME you're wasting remaining an AFC. More time could be spent on making social connection, upping your possibilities, friends,etc. Hell, while we we're at it, adventures, opportunities, goals being met, not to mention GREAT sex. To me, life is like a hotel. I'd rather stay at the Waldorf Astoria than Motel 6
Francisco d'Anconia said:
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Two whole days???My Name is Nobody said:
She could have had a baby with another guy during that time! C'mon, are you guys married or what?Francisco d'Anconia said:Two whole days???
Francisco d'Anconia said:
The really hot ones usually will play games/sh*t test. Remember Eddie Murphy's famous routine about "what have you done for me lately?" The girl in the routine was referring to having the man buy her something, but I look at it more as "what alpha male qualities have you displayed to me lately?" Hence the sh*t tests. It's simple biology. The female wants to see if the the mate she picked is as good as she hopes he is. As males, we only need one glance to know if she's hot and BAM! she's our mate (for a while at least), but the female, on the other hand needs constant reinforcement concerning her man's alpha male qualities. So, go ahead and ALPHA! They LOOOOOVE it. When she starts giving you a hard time, or when you think you're losing her interest, it's actually time to pass her **** tests. Now, if all fails, for some reason, and if you like her (not as oneitis, but a milder form) and want her to stick around a while longer, then keep reminding her you can leave at any minute. That usually works. Remember, women always want to be validated. Leaving is dis-validation for them.My Name is Nobody said:
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
My Name is Nobody said:
If I were you, I'd ALWAYS keep in mind that you have to be willing to lose the girl. Never come back like a puppy dog with his tail between his legs. They'll never forget an incident like that, and they'll lose respect for you. In other words, they'll never think of you the same way and try to play you further.My Name is Nobody said:
).evelsteve said:Besides an Alpha male doesn't fear loss/rejection, because he can always get another woman. I've come to learn that the more women you interact with, the more chances you'll get to meet the "right one" (for me, the right one is an attractive, outgoing woman, who LOVES to give head, is bi-sexual, and is a GOOD friend at the same time, believe me, I've met and had a couple
If anything, turn the tables and send her a picture on your phone of you and a hot babe, hamming it up at a club. Or text her: "I'm at a club with (fill in the blank with a woman's name, real or fake) stop by, and hang out" like nothing happened. Otherwise she'll see you as needy, and it's all over, my friend. The message you're sending to her, and frankly ANY potential mate, is that you WANT her, but you don't really NEED her. Make an attempt to make her need YOU by informing her about all the FUN she won't have by not being with you.
Hey, you said it, not meMy Name is Nobody said:
evelsteve said:Hey, you said it, not me
As far as the photo thing being childish, honestly, that sounds more like the AFC than the Alpha Male. It's your call, but women usually ALWAYS want a guy who's good with other women, or especially guys that can GET hot women. I've seen it, time and time again. I stopped wagging the AFC finger and started beating the Alpha Male chest. Again, don't be afraid to Alpha. THEY LIKE IT!
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.