"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Does flaking = automatic write off

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TheBigShow

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Hey Don Juan's!

I'm interested to hear your thoughts on how to act when a girls flakes on a date...

Do you cut it off then and there, or give her a second chance?

Im in a situation where I wouldn't mind going out with a girl...but she flaked on our meeting. She did apologise and ask to try again...would you say yes or make her sweat it out?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Harry Wilmington

Master Don Juan
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If she flakes, she's OUT.

I swear, guys must think girls have Alzheimer's disease when it comes to remembering dates. When they get a new job, even if it starts a month from when they got hired, they remember to show up. They buy tickets for a concert months in advance, yet remember to show up to it. They hear about a party happening that's 2 months away and are the first to sign up for the guest list and be there at the designated time...

And yet, you ask a girl out 2 days in advance, and you buy into the excuse that she forgot about it??? :crackup:

Flaking = low-to-no interest. C'mon, maaaan! You think she's going to forget about something as important as meeting the potential love of her life?? Only if she's not interested!
 
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casaanova

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You can give her another chance, but she has to make up for that flake. Whether she pays for the date, cooks you dinner, or does the driving, she has to right that wrong in some way. If she refuses to do so or she flakes again, then she wasn't that interested in you anyway, and you can move on to the next one.
 
Z

zinc4

Master Don Juan
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TheBigShow said:
Hey Don Juan's!

I'm interested to hear your thoughts on how to act when a girls flakes on a date...

Do you cut it off then and there, or give her a second chance?

Im in a situation where I wouldn't mind going out with a girl...but she flaked on our meeting. She did apologise and ask to try again...would you say yes or make her sweat it out?
Click to expand...

If she offered another time and gave a good reason then try one more time.......

Let me explain....i just flaked recently on a new girl that i met and she didn't give me another chance after i flaked probably because she is beta as hell and it offended her pride...but i had a legit reason that popped up out of no where...if she offere another time then it would be stupid to not accept unless you don't like her....if she doesn't offer another time then NEXT.
 
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TheBigShow

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casaanova said:
You can give her another chance, but she has to make up for that flake. Whether she pays for the date, cooks you dinner, or does the driving, she has to right that wrong in some way. If she refuses to do so or she flakes again, then she wasn't that interested in you anyway, and you can move on to the next one.
Click to expand...

I agree totally with that! But I guess proceed warily...this girl is cute, funny & gives the perception of high interest level (always sends lengthy texts with heaps of ;)'s or !!!'s and all that stuff)

So the the flake really p*ssed me off! I'm considering accepting, then flaking on her last minute to even the playing field again. Is that just spiteful?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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HedoRick

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I would honestly play it cool and give her one more chance. Two strike rule is golden for me. I've met up with some girls that flaked on me the first time for a legitamate reason(illnesses, etc). Truth is at least she let you know that she wasn't going to make it. A true flaky flake doesen't even text to let you know that she won't be there. Radio silence is the kind of flakes that piss me off.
 
T

Trump

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TheBigShow said:
Hey Don Juan's!

I'm interested to hear your thoughts on how to act when a girls flakes on a date...

Do you cut it off then and there, or give her a second chance?

Im in a situation where I wouldn't mind going out with a girl...but she flaked on our meeting. She did apologise and ask to try again...would you say yes or make her sweat it out?
Click to expand...
Depends on the reason for flaking. Traffic accident, grandma passed away, OK. Any emotional reasons, would say no.

I don't think a girl ever "sweats it out" in wanting to meet you, unless you are a movie star.
 
DragonBlood

DragonBlood

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If she asked for a second chance or wanted to choose a different day give her a second chance. After that though if she flakes she has pretty much blown it.
 
bigneil

bigneil

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If she provides a raincheck it's ok but make her work for it a little more. If she's never flaked before it is a bad sign in which case you go NC and force her to initiate.
 
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TheBigShow

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In this case it's a definite NC. Ill keep the option open if she contacts me but the balls in her court.

On a side note of NC...man Facebook is annoying...just as you forget about her BAM...she's on you news feed argh!
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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