"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Do you think the magnetic jaw lock will mean less fat chicks?

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
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I was reading this, and it got me interested:
On June 28, researchers in the United Kingdom and New Zealand announced the invention of DentalSlim Diet Control, a new intra-oral locking device reminiscent of an archaic torture mechanism. Its two magnetic pieces are designed to prevent a person’s jaw from opening by more than 2 millimeters—a distance the creators said “allows free speech and doesn’t restrict breathing.” The goal, per the project’s researchers, is to combat obesity by limiting wearers to a liquid-only diet.
magnetic jaw lock.jpg

:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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CAPSLOCK BANDIT

Master Don Juan
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How close are we to just attaching a magnetic collar to their necks and releasing flying buzz saw blades
 
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