You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Hahaha, man... fun to think about reaching that kind of smv in womens' eyes one day lol.That said, asking for an on the spot selfie at some point is fine. Women do it to me all of the time when I place an ad because they think my ad is fake. They always send one in return or offer one up first when asking, so it’s a mutual courtesy.
OLD sucks in general I guess unless you're in a big city that has a large supply and is easy to meet up due to everything being in a short distance and takes little effort to plan something. Like NYC for example. Around me for example on OLD just to find ANY woman for that matter you have to look at least 30 miles away. Then set up the date and all. The last date was 25 miles away I had to drive.Never take advice on how to succeed from someone who is visibly frustrated by failure.
If OLD is this frustrating of a process, stop using it.
That said, asking for an on the spot selfie at some point is fine. Women do it to me all of the time when I place an ad because they think my ad is fake. They always send one in return or offer one up first when asking, so it’s a mutual courtesy.
The newspaper bit is too much though. That won’t work.
Yes, BUT I imagine somewhere like NYC if you can hangout somewhere on the weekends you can simply use Tinder or Match, Hinge and meet people within a couple mile radius the same night you're out there and requires little planning in advance to grab a drink instead of chatting for days back and forth and having to set up a meeting.You act like you’re crossing the Sahara desert.
I live in the NYC area and, yes, it is more densely populated obviously. But that’s part of the problem here too. Population density, poor infrastructure, tolls, bridges, construction, lights, bad traffic... it takes me 20 minutes just to drive 5 miles in the suburbs. 20 miles can take an hour most days. Sometimes twice as long if I have to drive east.
25 miles in a thinly populated area is not as bad as you make it sound.
And like I said, if OLD doesn’t work for you, stop using it. I’ve told you this already multiple times.
Nope, I got the number! I'm heading out for a couple hours and just asked for it. I said it's easier than the facebook app chatting and she just gave it out. I did a reverse phone search and it's really her number so I looked her up on facebook and she's legit.I don’t work like that. Too busy. My free time is scheduled like business is, and I limit how much of it goes to a new woman. If I’m out and about willing to meet a new one, I don’t go to my phone. I look around the room.
Pass.
Only good for a one time hook up at best, and she would have to know that’s what it will probably be.
45 miles from either of your homes for alcohol will lead nowhere unless she’s DTF in a motel. Too much work. Unlikely with a kid and 90 miles of distance. 1 year or less divorced maybe she would go for it. 4 years divorced too long...she already had that fun with randoms by now. Probably had her fill and is looking to settle down again. She wouldn’t entertain men 80-90 miles away for any other reason, aside from being massively desperate for a damn good reason.
Besides. You’re jumping the gun. You don’t even have a number but you’re already planning the date?
You’re aimless and lost at sea with the way you’re approaching women.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Video callI was watching this video from "A33hole Consulting", and it got me interested: