after browsing some threads I think I'm more confused than before I came across this site. Half the things I read say to show interest right from the get go because apparently if you wait then the girl will assume you just want to be friends. The other half say if you show interest too soon then the girl gets freaked out. What do you guys think?
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
do you show interest asap or further down the line
- Thread starter duke104
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Diaforetikos
Senior Don Juan
Show interest after you see her interest in you. For this you need to learn to read the "Indicators of Interest". But once you can read her and she is showing signs of interest, give her a little sign yourself, because like you said, if you don't show any interest, she'll think you just want to be friends.
When you do show interest though, don't be so strong with it. Be chill and have fun. But after this initial display of interest, don't show much else. She should be wondering why you aren't interested anymore. She is supposed to fight for your attention at this point. Keep her interest high and you'll have won her over soon enough.
When you do show interest though, don't be so strong with it. Be chill and have fun. But after this initial display of interest, don't show much else. She should be wondering why you aren't interested anymore. She is supposed to fight for your attention at this point. Keep her interest high and you'll have won her over soon enough.
SgtSplacker
Master Don Juan
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You always want to be sexual, so this is a way of showing interest off the bat.
But you don't want to express your affections too early or even at all.
Sexual interest is different than relationship interest...
Sexual goes first, relationship goes after she goes...
But you don't want to express your affections too early or even at all.
Sexual interest is different than relationship interest...
Sexual goes first, relationship goes after she goes...
Iceberg
Master Don Juan
duke104 said:
I think you should view this site as a source of opinions, not facts. We're talking about human interaction, after all. Not math. There are no 100% definite answers - Other than the basic - women want men.
What works for you might not work for me. Different personalities will have different styles of game.
To answer your question - whether or not I show interest right away depends on the situation, and it depends on your definition of "show interest".
If it's a girl who I'll see a lot (work, gym, coffee shop, etc) then I don't show interest right away. Maybe I'll chat with her, make her laugh, etc. But I don't lay it on heavy with the flirting, because I know I'll see her again.
If it's a girl who I WON'T see a lot (nightclub, bar, party), then I show interest quickly. Flirting, kino, etc. In this situation, I have to make my attraction clear because who knows if I see this girl again.
How I show interest also depends on the situation. Obviously, you wouldn't flirt with a girl at work the same way you'd flirt with a girl in a night club.