DJ Bible Study, Lessons 6 through 10 of Pook's "15 Lessons"

Peaks&Valleys

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Welcome to DJ Bible Study.

Lessons 6 through 10 of Pook's "15 Lessons"

They can be read here: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=59150

Last week's discussion can be read here: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=212115

During this week's reading I realized something. I am fortunate in a way, I have a $hit ton of experience under my belt....successes and failures, weighted more towards the latter. So, unlike some new guys starting out, this information isn't necessary a road map for me, it's more of an explanation of my previous journey. "This is where you took a wrong turn, this is where you got lucky, this is where you were smooth sailing, and this is where that storm hit and you somehow steered your way out." And of course, by going over my previous journey, my current one should be a little smoother.

I'm sure we've all had those "aha" moments while viewing the forums. Something that just hits you square in the face, something that had previously been right out of your grasp. At the beginning, I was getting those aha moments all the time, but the longer I'm on here the "aha" moments seem to be coming less and less, which means I'm learning :up: This is one of the main reasons I wanted to try this Bible Study, something different, dig into what some of these great Don Juans of yore have to say. Try it from their perspective.

So....as with a lot of New Years resolutions, I didn't want one of my self improvement resolutions (the reading of the DJ Bible) to fall by the way side, like had happened before. So I set a plan and a goal. And a way to combine the un-fun homework like task of reading the bible with the fun and interesting forums. :up: Plus, this way, I am accountable to others, and not just myself. And also, by actually "studying" the bible vs. just reading it, the information is actually sinking in, and making an impact. This week's "studying" produced an "aha" moment for me, something that I had previously overlooked by simply "reading" it.

Now that that's all explained, here are my notes:

Lesson 6: “You are the Great Catch.”

Pretty self explanatory here, don't put pu$$y on the pedestal.
Don't try to win girls. No one respects beggars.
You are the prize but that doesn't mean you should stop improving yourself.
Pook said:
"Ripening is better than rotting."
Don't change for anyone else, change for yourself. Change comes from within.

Pook said:
"If you are not changed by life, then you are not living life! Only those who are not altered by life are those totally unaware of it!”
You can be guided by mother or other people your whole life, or you can break free and guide yourself.

Don't be ordinary, be a catch.


Lesson 7: “Respect is All.”

Pook said:
“By pleasing her whims, I lost track of mine. A servant you’ll be, a friend she’ll see.
Where there is reverence there is fear. If she has no fear of you having the option to leave, then she cannot respect the relationship.

Woman fear the great catch walking away.

She should be with you to "celebrate life with you", not to use you.

And of course, you need to respect yourself first, or there's no fvcking way she's sticking around, unless of course she's a 4 and you're an 8. But if that's the case, then you're in a $hitty situation anyways.....and should start coming to Bible study pronto.


Lesson 8: “Only the Sexual Ones get the girls.”

Women respond to sexuality, your sexuality. Embrace it, you are man, you are sexual. It is in our nature.

RTLS (relatable true life story): FB of mine, I've talked about her in a few previous threads, texts me on a weekday night, "what are you doing?" This is translation for "I have some free time, do you want to have sex." I was actually planning on going out to have a beer by myself. I had been home all day (work from home) and I just wanted to get out, and some game was on. So I told her I was getting a beer, and said: "why don't you join me." She replies: "how about you text me when you get back home." I think, $hit, all we do is bang, she'll like this, so I say: "C'mon, come get a drink." So she says: "Okay". She meets me, we have a beer, I pay, we have a good convo, a few laughs, I learn some new things about her. As we're leaving, I'm getting this weird vibe from her...she seems to read my thoughts and says: "I'm just going to go home." She said it just like she was saying she was going to the store. But I knew what was happening, I could feel it, but I didn't know why..... She was a chick I had had a ONS with at my place, I had never been to her place. Every time, after that ONS, she had continued to come over to my place, we would fvck, then she would leave. That was it. No pillow talk, no staying over. She just wanted me to fvck her. And, she seemed completely content doing just that.

Our roles were defined. She had other guys for the other stuff. By having her come meet me for a beer and, get to know her more, talk about our lives, I threw a wrench in the whole FB dynamic. What I thought was something that could only strengthen the FB relationship, actually brought it to it's demise. She had been coming over 1 to 2 nights a week for a couple months, but after the bar "incident" it all stopped....just like that. The late night booty texts from her, the random calls when she was getting off work....gone. I did manage to rekindle it a few months later, somewhat, but it hasn't been the same since. It's a FB relationship that's now tied together with bubble gum and band-aids. I finally ended up going NC with her, and she's been responding well to it :) So we'll see.

Side note on this one: Why don't I just spin plates? Well, I try, BUT this one.....strong HB8....and fvcks like a pornstar. In and out. Why wouldn't I try to keep that going?

^^^So this story here combined with this lesson, were the inspirations for this thread: http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=212292

After I figured out how I crashed and burned that good thing I had going, I started looking at past FB relationships. And they all seemed to be the same type of method or formula, even the ones that would later say they wanted something more. It was cut and dry, everything was virtually about sex, no real games, no fvcking around, just fvcking. And the chicks were all happy!!! Sometimes she would try to change the dynamic, sometimes I would, but always, when that happened.....it just ended all together.

All of this^^^I'm sure has been said in one way or anther in these threads. With a few of these guys, this is basically their mindset. And this is basically how they end up treating most of their relationships with women. I, however, didn't grasp this concept fully for whatever reason. I think it's because I like being in LTR's, or having plates to do stuff with, other than fvcking. I like going to the beach with chicks, having BBQ's, going out for drinks, watching movies and $hit with them. So, when I get a quality FB(HB8 and up) I seem to fvck things up when I try to turn an already purely sexual relationship into something more than it is. And half the time I thought I was doing the chick a favor, and doing what she wanted :down:, you know, quality fvck buddy time. I kind of understood what was going on, why it was going south, but not fully, it was one of those concepts that had been floating around, just waiting to be fully realized.

So, I'm summing it all up with this:

Be a sexual man, and you will attract sexual women. And if you do this, just don't fvck it up.


Lesson 9: "Be not contained by formula."

This one speaks for itself. I've had different successes for different reasons. Sometimes generalizations are just that, generalizations. And they can be perceived in many ways. Even my "forumla" for FB's :D is just a formula, let it guide you if you wish, but if you can improve on it or do some variation, what works for you, then go for it. But if you get lost or confused, then use it to fall back on.

These rules and laws are training wheels. Some of them are basic, these are the ones with the most variations. Some of them are advanced, should be followed more strictly. They will help get you going, but to really fly, eventually you're going to need to ditch the training wheels.

Actor (scripted) vs. Actual (natural)


Lesson 10: “As you think, you shall become.”

Does confidence make you successful? Or does success make you confident.
There's been quite a few threads recently discussing confidence, including last week's Bible Study. It seems Pook was a strong advocate of it. But, the whole dilema with confidence is how do you obtain it. Where's that perfect formula?

Can you be confident even though you're a 40 year old virgin? If you're confident at your job does some of that confidence spill over to your dealings with women? Must you bang a chick to be confident? Or do you need to be confident to bang a chick?

What came first the chick-en or the egg? (the egg being confidence of course, did you see what I did there?)

Some things in life are out of your control, you absolutely can not see them coming. It is what it is. That's life, $hit happens.....understand this. Some things, however, you can control, some things you can see coming. Control those things. Including yourself, but to be able to control yourself you must know yourself first. So.....

"Know thyself." :up:
 
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Grewd

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+1 This is really good!
 

Peaks&Valleys

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Thanks Grewd.

That Lesson 8 still has me thinking. I've been trying to figure out the FB dynamic for basically my whole life :D. What's the best way to make them work. And why, or how, do they get fvcked up. Basically, how can I make them last.

I think what it boils down to, is the simplicity of it. Too much over thinking ends up going into it. That's why they usually start out fine, but end up not lasting because one party ends up meddling with a perfectly good thing. And it's usually the guy! And when the chick tries to mess with it, instead of the guy reeling her back in, he plays along, which ends up making the whole thing crash and burn. So, honestly, even if both parties wanted to take the relationship to the next level, the dynamic is so far on the other end of the spectrum than an LTR, that there is no possible way it could ever work.

A lot of these concepts, especially the ones that Pook talks about, are all encompassing, building up that inner game. But some of them are defined for certain situations. Situational awareness. So it seems like sometimes he can be contradicting himself, but really he's talking about two totally different situations, different dynamics.

For instance, in my "notes" I go from one lesson talking about how the woman should be "celebrating life with you", which was Pook's quote, to the next lesson talking about how, once you start banging a chick, you shouldn't even take her out to a bar, which is what I related to that lesson :)

Two totally different concepts....but used for two totally different situations.

Pook wrote a post where he talks about letting a relationship build naturally....taking your time with it, not pushing for sex.
Here: http://www.sosuave.com/ubb/Forum6/HTML/000265.html
Pook said:
It can be wise not to seduce too fast, to not get her between your sheets ASAP. Patience is always a good thing and lets things grow between you two.

Confident guys are confident because they know that it will come. If it is not now, then it will come. If it will come, then it is not now. Yet, it will come. I think patience has been the biggest element to my success than anything else.
Some guys were confused by it, because of some of his other teachings. But what he was talking about, and which he mentioned in his first line, was that these are the ways if you're looking to get into a healthy LTR with the girl.

And it does makes perfect sense. The LTR relationship vs. the Fvck Buddy relationship. Two completely different dynamics, and two completely different ways to go about them.

The genius of Pook.
 
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Grewd

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It's far from just Pook who has realized the essence of the game at play here. The main thing you ultimately need is knowing how to keep it together. Try grasping the concepts of buddhism, philosophy, religion, humanity and relate it to your personal experience. Tap into memory after memory and closely observe the flow of emotions and the perception.

Creation of concepts happens by observing reality and a process of thinking. Information comes in, information is transformed and created. Any human relationship is like this, give and receive. This is obvious, but few dare to realize the source of it as it forces them to see the truth of every harmful thing they did. The emotional impact is massive, but it can be extremely empowering if channeled correctly. Life at it's best is to be the process itself, to fully realize who and what we are. Then you will think like Pook.

The irony is that when you get there you realize you already had it.
 

zekko

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Here I am, late as usual.

Peaks&Valleys said:
During this week's reading I realized something. I am fortunate in a way, I have a $hit ton of experience under my belt....successes and failures, weighted more towards the latter. So, unlike some new guys starting out, this information isn't necessary a road map for me, it's more of an explanation of my previous journey.
You're right, the more experience that you have, the more familiar a lot of the material seems. I don't mean this as a put-down, but Pook's writings seem very adolescent to me, like they are written by and directed toward high school students. I guess that shouldn't be surprised, since beginning level materials about male-female relations are inherently adolescent. I think you would get maximum benefit from this material if you read it when you are somewhere between 16 and 20 years old.

LESSON 6 AND 7: The You Are The Great Catch or the "You are the prize" lesson is a classic, this is one of the most valuable mindsets to have.

Of course, for this to really benefit you, it helps a lot if the girl thinks you are the great prize to be won as well. And the same with lesson 7: Respect is All. Maybe it's true that The Great Catch walking away is woman's Great Fear. But she still has to consider you the Great Catch for this to take effect. And that's where self improvement comes in - forge yourself into the great prize.

LESSON 8, only the sexual ones get the girls: Good point, embrace your sexuality. The only caveat I might add is to remember there is a time and a place. I don't think you're going to gain respect if you act like a horny toad 24 hours a day.

LESSON 9, Be not contained by formula: Some posters here criticize me for being contrarian. I don't think I'm contrarian, but for every little PUA type of hint, tip, technique, myth, or dogma I hear, it reminds me that there is a greater and larger truth and world out there. Don't limit yourself to these "training wheels", which are very narrow in vision. Pook himself states here that the idea is to move beyond these tips, not get stuck in blind worship and devotion to them. And I think that's a major reason why he is no longer posting here.

LESSON 10, As you think, so shall you become: It's funny that he prefaces this by saying "That is the secret", because this is similar to the book The Secret. Anyway, this seems a little bit like magical thinking, but is it true? I think it is, for the most part. Maybe not entirely, but mostly.

It's a good mindset to have. Play the role of the character that you have in your mind of who you want to be. Why not?
 

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Peaks&Valleys

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zekko said:
You're right, the more experience that you have, the more familiar a lot of the material seems. I don't mean this as a put-down, but Pook's writings seem very adolescent to me, like they are written by and directed toward high school students. I guess that shouldn't be surprised, since beginning level materials about male-female relations are inherently adolescent. I think you would get maximum benefit from this material if you read it when you are somewhere between 16 and 20 years old.
I don't know. I honestly could see someone with virtually no experience reading those lessons, and understanding them. But, someone like me, it's either reiterating, or pointing out something I know but really didn't understand, or just bringing this new concept in all together. I think the 15 Lessons could probably be thrown together into two paragraphs, with some rough explanations inbetween. But instead he's just really breaking them down to a fundamental level. That way you can internalize them for yourself, and not just go off a list of things to do, or ways to act.

zekko said:
LESSON 6 AND 7: The You Are The Great Catch or the "You are the prize" lesson is a classic, this is one of the most valuable mindsets to have.

Of course, for this to really benefit you, it helps a lot if the girl thinks you are the great prize to be won as well. And the same with lesson 7: Respect is All. Maybe it's true that The Great Catch walking away is woman's Great Fear. But she still has to consider you the Great Catch for this to take effect. And that's where self improvement comes in - forge yourself into the great prize.
Become the man you want to be.


zekko said:
LESSON 8, only the sexual ones get the girls: Good point, embrace your sexuality. The only caveat I might add is to remember there is a time and a place. I don't think you're going to gain respect if you act like a horny toad 24 hours a day.
Haha, yes, this probably should be mentioned. You can't just walk around with a stiffy all day, trying to feel up chicks. That's not going to work. Awareness of yourself and your surroundings. A time and a place, definitely :D

zekko said:
LESSON 9, Be not contained by formula: Some posters here criticize me for being contrarian. I don't think I'm contrarian, but for every little PUA type of hint, tip, technique, myth, or dogma I hear, it reminds me that there is a greater and larger truth and world out there. Don't limit yourself to these "training wheels", which are very narrow in vision. Pook himself states here that the idea is to move beyond these tips, not get stuck in blind worship and devotion to them. And I think that's a major reason why he is no longer posting here.
Learn to think for yourself, follow your instincts. A lot of that comes with experience, as well as tapping into that inner Man DNA, along with awareness and understanding of your surroundings. What I see on here is guys will repeat the same lines, the same formulas for situations that may seem the same, but are ultimately different. A + B = C yes, that's true, but looky here, did you see this, there's this D floating around in the equation over here....throws everything off now, doesn't it.

zekko said:
LESSON 10, As you think, so shall you become: It's funny that he prefaces this by saying "That is the secret", because this is similar to the book The Secret. Anyway, this seems a little bit like magical thinking, but is it true? I think it is, for the most part. Maybe not entirely, but mostly.

It's a good mindset to have. Play the role of the character that you have in your mind of who you want to be. Why not?
The mind is a powerful thing. Perception is reality. Just don't be a fool. Self mastery.
 

CaptainSaveAh0

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WOW. I can't agree more with all of these lessons. I really do believe self improvement and the correct mindset is the best method for attracting women.

Regarding lesson 8, expressing sexuality is crucial when meeting woman, especially new woman. If you don't establish some sexual aspects right off the bat then most likely the girl will just write you off as another guy in the friend zone. Make your intentions clear. Obviously this takes practice in order for it to be effective and not come off too strong or as a creep. If you do not engage a sexual tension with the woman you are pursuing for the most part ( even if she finds you attractive and wants to fvck) she won't as well. This will lead you into the DREADED friend zone, when you could be FWB.

My favorite lesson from today has to be lesson 9. After reading the game it shed some light about the life of the "PUA" and some of it I agreed with while a lot of it I found pretty weird. As much as a lot of these PUA guru's were helping guys get laid and talk to woman , most of these guys had no idea who THEY were , they were just memorizing scripts and acting them out to woman. Sure, if you play all your cards right, this might lead to you getting laid a few times or maybe land you a few numbers. But then what. What happens when you have to go out with a girl and run out of scripted material? I am not bashing or saying the PUA material is useless but I am saying develop your own persona and use the material that is there in the best way that works for you. Having a personality and being a social person will work wonders and with a mixture of some of the PUA material can work wonders. TRIAL AND ERROR , go out there and explore the world.

Overall I think all of these lessons touched on some excellent points towards self improvement and becoming the person you want to become. Once a woman sees a man building his "empire" she will want to be a part of it and fight for HIM instead of the other way around. By empire I mean constant self improvement of game, health, wealth and happiness.
 

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CaptainSaveAh0 said:
Regarding lesson 8, expressing sexuality is crucial when meeting woman, especially new woman. If you don't establish some sexual aspects right off the bat then most likely the girl will just write you off as another guy in the friend zone.
This reminds me a bit of lesson two, about the friend zone, which Backbreaker disagreed with last week. I have to disagree with this as well, depending on what the situation is. If you're taking a girl out, then you should definitely be sexual.

But if it's a girl you're just meeting casually for the first time or whatever, I don't think it's necessary to be immediately sexual to avoid the friend zone. I've known some women for years and had the relationship gradually morph from acquaintance to friendly to sexual. A lot of the time when you meet a girl, the timing is not right. She may be with someone else, or you may be, or you both may be.

Come to think of it, doesn't being immediately sexual contradict lesson four, which is about patience being the refined sense of confidence? In that one, the guy lays back while all the other guys hit on the chicks.
 

CaptainSaveAh0

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zekko said:
Come to think of it, doesn't being immediately sexual contradict lesson four, which is about patience being the refined sense of confidence? In that one, the guy lays back while all the other guys hit on the chicks.
I don't disagree with you zekko, it really does depend on the situation, and sometimes patience is key. I guess it is all about how good your judgement is. When meeting up or on the first date it doesnt hurt to throw in some small sexual jokes in a playful manner just to test the waters and give you an idea about her sexual availability. I think it also depends on the attraction that was built on the first encounter with her.
 

backbreaker

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The biggest change in my game, came when i stopped masturbating.

AFter that, it's almost like everything else just snapped into place. I didn't have to think about being sexual.. After like -6 months of not jacking off I would **** a goldfish if it looked at me right lol.


2 different situtations

1. I was 20 years old, my oneitis came over my house. Friday night. raining outside. she said she wanted to go to a party but we ended up ordering pizza and watching TV all night. By all night i Mean, i did not take her home until 6am. she's at my house, she kicks her shoes off, we're on the couch. 2-3am in the morning. I'm sitting here the entire time thinking 'Okay what do i do now.. i don't want to come off as too agressive but i know i need to do something". I Don't know what to do. I'm too timid to do something, I'm to confused not to do something. I end up shooting my wad and I'm now well back in the friendzone phase. I could have ****ed the dog **** out of that girl that night lol. she was pradtically begging for it. It's like she was pleding for me to be a man and man up and bend her over my couch.


2. 2 years later, it was a saturday.. i hadn't had sex i like 2 weeks. I was horny.. this chick i just met like, 2 days before.. she calls me and i'm like hey babe.. what are you doing to night. come over tonight. she was like I don't know you lol. I was like so lol. come over. I want to see you. she's like..okay how do i get there. so she comes over and not 20 minutes of her being there i got my arm around her and im' nibbling on her neck trying to get her pants off. She's either going to **** or get off the pot i'm horny lol. i'm either oging to **** her or i'm going to go out and try to get some. i need to get laid. by now jacking off just is not an option anymore.

she left and she told her friend who is a friend of mine that i was moving too fast.. but a week later she texts me and asks me why i don't talk to her anymore (She wanted to go out on a date). take her out on a real date the next day, **** her brains out lol. she wanted it the first night she just didn't want to feel like a slut by ****ing me without even going on a date.


Masturbation is the biggest un talked about problem on this forum. STop doing it. I know it's hard. Trust me. Stop. Stop doing it. altogether. That's how you be sexual. you are natrually sexual. you don't have to try to be. You jacking off 2-3 times a day takes you out of your naturally sexed up state
 
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