"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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danro

Don Juan
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Alright, I've been dating this girl for about 2 or 3 weeks. This is our second time dating. Lately she has become kind of distant, she still talks with me and everything but she doesnt hold hands or cuddle with me anymore. So I'm wondering is this just normal behavior for a girl at this point in a relationship or is she trying to tell me something?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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OfficeSpace

Master Don Juan
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Well it could be one of two things in my opinion:

* She might be shy because she has more feelings for you now.

* She might be losing interest

I think only you can answer your own question since you know her in person, while us on this forum don't. Ask yourself, how did the date go... Did you act too needy? Or did it go great, with a ton of kino, and the works?

To be honest, from what you've written it seems like she is trying to distance herself from you. If before she was cuddling and holding hands, and now after 2 dates she stopped, something is deffinitely up.

Make sure you're not acting too needy or whatever, since that can be a turn-off for a lot of girls. You can still fix things bro, it's not too late!
 

lordson

Senior Don Juan
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oooo, be warey, sorry to scare you

but sudden dstance like that is a bad sign, because hse amybe losing interest

do what neon base tells you, dont act too clingy, be more of a man, make her see that you dont really give a **** if you dont ahve her and you can still get any woman you want

thats really important, you could intentioannly miss a phone call, *risky* is you want so she can miss you for a bit and be pining for you again

but i really wouldn't try that unless you know whats gotten her so weird latetly

but

i reckon, whatever is giong to happen, or whatever she is wanting to happen, is going to happen regarless of what you do

not very helpful, but thats just my comments on the situation
 

danro

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Thanks guys. I'm doing a little bit of reverse phsycology and im starting to call her less and when hanging out in a group, flirting with other girls and not talking to her as much. I feel the way things are going we probably won't be together much long, but oh well just makes me available again.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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