Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

Read more...

Dilema

yodoso

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 21, 2004
Messages
38
Reaction score
0
Age
41
Location
chicago
Good evening DJ's, on my quest to become a DJ i've run across a Dilema

I work with this attractive female we'll call her donna. I did everything right not judging myself but I can tell from her actions. Anyway I got donna's number basically when I first met her. I did not deny my desires like a nice guy, but I never disrepected her either. I don't give her too much attention, matter of fact she always approaches me. I know this woman is interested in me, you can tell by everything she does especially body language. Any way everything has been going great with me and her.

I've got a male friend on the job we'll call him mike. Me and Mike are good friends. He told me he went out with donna last friday.
I think he's lying

My manager on the job is a real cool guy we'll call him Bob. Bob and Donna talk all the time and are like best friends. Bob told me that Donna said Mike asked her out She turned him down.

Before I knew any of this information I tried to kiss Donna to guage her interest. We were alone on the step at our job. She back down and I said whats wrong, she said look where we are......... and left. I'm not sure if she

1. not interested
2. scared(she is the shy type)
3. Dating my friend

I've got a good friendship with Mike and I really didn't want to mess it up.

As an aspiring when I see Donna again I plan to grab both of her hands, look her in the eyes and say. "I wouldn't ask you this if I didn't need to know", "Did you ever go out with Mike?"

Depending on her answer I'll either continue attracting this woman or forget about her. What do you guys suggest?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Wiesman44

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 2, 2004
Messages
1,341
Reaction score
14
You're like a little child, so worried about other peoples actions. Grabbing her hand and asking her if she went out with Mike will do you no good, it will only satisfy your curiousity, which really isn't any of your business to begin with.

Second of all, if she was interested in you, she would have kissed you. Plain and simple. Women who find an interest in you cant wait for you to kiss them. Unless you were in work or sitting a table with family, I dont think she'd mind a kiss.

Sounds like you're very inexperienced with women. My best tip would be for you to ask her out on an actual date and get rejected. Its good to be rejected, b/c it gives you motivation to go after more fish.
 

yodoso

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 21, 2004
Messages
38
Reaction score
0
Age
41
Location
chicago
I was 110% sure that she was interested. I tried to kiss her to give her a strong emotional response thus causing drama and increasing her interest.
 

Kaine

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 11, 2004
Messages
475
Reaction score
1
Location
In your head
You tried to kiss her on the step of YOUR WORK?

What were you doing prior to kissing her, were you discussing the finer points of politics?

Maybe you could wait for a better opportunity like when her grand father's just passed away at the hospital. Yeah that sounds more romantic.

Kaine
 

Andromax

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 31, 2004
Messages
393
Reaction score
0
Age
43
Location
Alaska
As a rule of thumb. Don't ever ask a female something like that unless you are seeing each other exclusively.

Kino and kissing is kind of out of place at work, I woulda done the same thing (push you off), but it might not all be lost.

as much as I oppose dating women that you work with,

Ask her out, or invite her over after work.

You will find out real quick whether or not she digs you.

Don't worry about Mike, just do your thing. All is fair in love and war. Did he stake a flag in her ass claiming her?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

DeathDealer

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 3, 2004
Messages
640
Reaction score
0
please do search in sosuave about hitting on b1tches at work, hate repeating myself but here is my standard whine:

you do not hit on h0s at work. if they hit on you, FINE but you do not do that.
 

MagnuM

Don Juan
Joined
May 24, 2003
Messages
188
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Dating people you see everyday at work is not a very wise thing to do.
 

yodoso

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 21, 2004
Messages
38
Reaction score
0
Age
41
Location
chicago
You see the thing is we only see each other 1 at the most 2 times a week. Were both part timers with a different schedule every week. I didn't ask her out because I wanted her to be a booty call chick. I made this clear early by asking her If I could come over, while talking to her on the phone. Also I just bought a car and I don't even have enough money to take myself out.
 

yodoso

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 21, 2004
Messages
38
Reaction score
0
Age
41
Location
chicago
I know this is unlikly, but what if she appologized for not kissing me. Hey, I do have this kind of status at work

i'd probably say something like
"as a man I have to respect your decision, I thought the stairs a good place since it was secluded. Why don't we go out next week and forget this happend"

depending on her answer I can finally know whether or not she was interested.
 

Desdinova

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 15, 2004
Messages
11,680
Reaction score
4,874
1) Don't stick your d1nk in the company ink
2) Don't dwell on rumors
3) Read the DJ bible

You're putting too much thought on her being interested. Your curiosity is going to get the best of you. Face it, there's some 5hit in life we'll never know the answers to.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

yodoso

Don Juan
Joined
Dec 21, 2004
Messages
38
Reaction score
0
Age
41
Location
chicago
Well DJ's I saw my kiss attempt girl at work today, as many of you can guess the situation was quite occward. I have no intensions of attracting or pursuing this woman ever again. So basically I greeted her with a hello and that was it. She did say "whats up, you seem quiet today". I just said whats up and left it at that. What should I do, i'm basically next to her for the whole time while I work.


After the greeting should I basically forget she exists?
should I make friendly convo?


know I know why many people don't get involved with people they work with.
 
Top