"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Differences between young and old women

sozzz

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Long story short. I cheated on my ex with a woman 3-4 yr older than me. My ex's family and friends found out. It was at work and it just happened. During that time, my ex and I always butt head even the smallest things. She was clingy and needy and insecure. Always wants to text and see me and pressuring me to finish school and get a better job so we could get married. I got tired and once again we fought...

Fast foward...

I got to know the girl at work and turned she had a boyfriend and they fought as well. We somehow got together and now we have been together for 8 months now. She's currently in her native country visiting for a month. It's been 2 weeks and i'm alone and made me think about her and my ex and about my future. I'm mid 20's and not getting younger.


I tried to weigh the pros and cons for my ex and my current one...

EX:22
PROS
-smart as hell. gpa 3. something high
-family oriented
-works hard
-knows how to do taxes, write checks and all that stuff.
-helps her parents bought a house

CONS
-needy, always want to see me. always call and text. if i dont text or call first she gets mad.
-clingy, always want to take her out or me come out. doesn't let me have my own space.
-jealous, always get mad and think im doing something bad if i dont pick up the phone...
-doesnt take care of herself after being with me for 2 years. sometimes i tell her to chew some gum or tell her to take care of her nails and shave. she then gets mad and flips out on me. i get mad inside talking to myself" if u dont f*cking take care of yourself now, what makes me think u gonna turn into a f*t b*tch when we married and have kids?"


this went on for a while where i sometimes had to run and pick up my phone and answer before she gets mad.. i eventually got tired and flipped out and swear at her and said "who the f**k are you that i gotta run and answer your call asap? u need to f*cking learn to trust me and stop being like this or i'll leave your a**". She cried and said shes sorry and later on, she went back to being her old self so i cheated on her...


CURRENT GIRL:29
PROS
-moved here from another country for several years now. just got her green card.
-works hard but doesnt have ged, working on it.
-guys hate when she walks with me in public. they look and talk sh*t. saying why she's with me.
-doesnt fight with me. always do as i say and go w/e i want to go. only gets mad when i talk about other girls or happen to look accidently.


CONS
-getting old and seems like she wants to have a family
-doesnt have ged so its hard to get a better job.
-my family doesn't like her, eventhough they havent seen her, just knowing that i left my ex for her, she they hate her...
-has only 10 yrs left until she loses her looks...


I'm here by myself and just thinking about my future and I have come to conclusion that my ex provides me a better future than my current one. But on the other hand, I don't want to msg her and beg or all that sh*t. I don't do that. If i don't do that then i dont know how else I will get her back. inside my head thats what i need to do but my pride says i refuse to do that. im thinking of just hanging in there for another 2 weeks until my current comes home and bust a bunch of load for a while and leave her or tell her i want to break up and let her go back to her ex. either way, shes going to cry...

I don't know what to do guys. please help. outside im fine, but inside i feel like im getting old and it feels like the inside of body is turning into debris each day thinking about this...:(

P.S i have been told by friends that my ex has been dating someone else and been dressing up and looking different than before... inside my head"why the f*ck couldn't she be like this when we were together?"...
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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VladPatton

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Ditch em both, and get one that is ALL of those qualities. If you feel like an old man in your 20's, you will be on MAOI's and SSRI's by the time you are 35.

In short, stop thinking so much, have some fun, and enjoy some experiences.
 

sozzz

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VladPatton said:
Ditch em both, and get one that is ALL of those qualities. If you feel like an old man in your 20's, you will be on MAOI's and SSRI's by the time you are 35.

In short, stop thinking so much, have some fun, and enjoy some experiences.
Thanks man. I don't know why im feeling like this. I just had surgery that prevented me from finishing school and work. now i'm 4 weeks recovering from surgery, i feel better than before but now family stuff hit me, not sure why.

Damn, if u were me, u'd ditch them both? It's hard to find a girl with both good qualities. not hard, but f*cking rare imo. :(

I'm mid 20's. not 20. I feel old man. I know my friends are older than me and they seem fine, but me, i feel old and depress eventhough i can get girls but not just any girl. back then i was young, i dont care what kind of girls, now i need one that has both of their good qualties.. :(
 

Burroughs

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Your two girls sound like the Indian girls I have dated
 

GADavid

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there are just 2 women left in the world? I could have swore I saw a cute, smart chick in chemistry today
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Purefilth

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take the saggy t*ts!!!!
 

sozzz

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The longer I stay with the 29 yr old, I think it is expected we get married and have a family. I could just keep her around and look for a young one, but I cant seem to do it. I have developed feelings for this one, and its f*cking wrong to go that route. i'd rather be straight foward with her when she gets back and tell her that I can't be with her because I'm still young and cannot be with her due to our age difference. By the time she's 50, i'll be 40 something.. i cant see myself in that situation. thats what im afraid off... :(

P.S my ex's family and friends all hate me now.. :(
 

Burroughs

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sozzz said:
. By the time she's 50, i'll be 30 something.. i cant see myself in that situation. thats what im afraid off... :(
Ummmmmm

are you fvcking retarded?

You said you were in your mid 20s...and she's 29

thats a 4 year difference not 15

don't be a fvcking troll
 

sozzz

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Burroughs said:
Ummmmmm

are you fvcking retarded?

You said you were in your mid 20s...and she's 29

thats a 4 year difference not 15

don't be a fvcking troll
thanks. I didn't want to do the math. u're right, we're 3-4 yr apart. no need to flip out dude...but u get my point. in the end she'll age faster than me.

I know why the hell didn't i think of this when I went through with it... but what guy can at the moment.. seriously... p***y is hard to let it slide by u know. now i regret my decision.

i edited it.

P.S by the time she's 50, i'll be 40 something.
 

Alvafe

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first you don't know how well she will age, unless you know her mother that most of time can give you hints.

your ex is hsitory, forget about her, you said she is taking care of herlself now, that is because if she didn't she would still be single, she is lazy not stupid, the second one 3 of his points I wouldn't care much, but each one is each one you can keep her around for as long as you like it, but normally if you have doubts just search for a new one.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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J Roc

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make the older chick a friend with benefits and start getting younger hotter chicks...
 

Burroughs

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no worries..its all good

seriously though both chicks sound like stone cold losers...you could certainly do better and you should aim to...never be held hostage to puzzy..its the fastest way to a bad life and an early grave
 

sozzz

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i do feel like i should go look for someone else better too but i dont like seeing her cry though. maybe im just too soft hearted compare to other guys who dont give a sh*t.

J Roc said:
make the older chick a friend with benefits and start getting younger hotter chicks...
I tried. she got mad and said she wanted to be my girl. she said we should give it a try and if it doesnt work out then its ok. so i accept. now i think about it i feel like its best if we be FB. but kind of hard now and she wont want that... either dump her or lie to her. i dont like lying to her like that. i aint that desperate. but on the other hand, its nice to hit it once in a while if u know what i mean.
 
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