Long story short. I cheated on my ex with a woman 3-4 yr older than me. My ex's family and friends found out. It was at work and it just happened. During that time, my ex and I always butt head even the smallest things. She was clingy and needy and insecure. Always wants to text and see me and pressuring me to finish school and get a better job so we could get married. I got tired and once again we fought...
Fast foward...
I got to know the girl at work and turned she had a boyfriend and they fought as well. We somehow got together and now we have been together for 8 months now. She's currently in her native country visiting for a month. It's been 2 weeks and i'm alone and made me think about her and my ex and about my future. I'm mid 20's and not getting younger.
I tried to weigh the pros and cons for my ex and my current one...
EX:22
PROS
-smart as hell. gpa 3. something high
-family oriented
-works hard
-knows how to do taxes, write checks and all that stuff.
-helps her parents bought a house
CONS
-needy, always want to see me. always call and text. if i dont text or call first she gets mad.
-clingy, always want to take her out or me come out. doesn't let me have my own space.
-jealous, always get mad and think im doing something bad if i dont pick up the phone...
-doesnt take care of herself after being with me for 2 years. sometimes i tell her to chew some gum or tell her to take care of her nails and shave. she then gets mad and flips out on me. i get mad inside talking to myself" if u dont f*cking take care of yourself now, what makes me think u gonna turn into a f*t b*tch when we married and have kids?"
this went on for a while where i sometimes had to run and pick up my phone and answer before she gets mad.. i eventually got tired and flipped out and swear at her and said "who the f**k are you that i gotta run and answer your call asap? u need to f*cking learn to trust me and stop being like this or i'll leave your a**". She cried and said shes sorry and later on, she went back to being her old self so i cheated on her...
CURRENT GIRL:29
PROS
-moved here from another country for several years now. just got her green card.
-works hard but doesnt have ged, working on it.
-guys hate when she walks with me in public. they look and talk sh*t. saying why she's with me.
-doesnt fight with me. always do as i say and go w/e i want to go. only gets mad when i talk about other girls or happen to look accidently.
CONS
-getting old and seems like she wants to have a family
-doesnt have ged so its hard to get a better job.
-my family doesn't like her, eventhough they havent seen her, just knowing that i left my ex for her, she they hate her...
-has only 10 yrs left until she loses her looks...
I'm here by myself and just thinking about my future and I have come to conclusion that my ex provides me a better future than my current one. But on the other hand, I don't want to msg her and beg or all that sh*t. I don't do that. If i don't do that then i dont know how else I will get her back. inside my head thats what i need to do but my pride says i refuse to do that. im thinking of just hanging in there for another 2 weeks until my current comes home and bust a bunch of load for a while and leave her or tell her i want to break up and let her go back to her ex. either way, shes going to cry...
I don't know what to do guys. please help. outside im fine, but inside i feel like im getting old and it feels like the inside of body is turning into debris each day thinking about this...
P.S i have been told by friends that my ex has been dating someone else and been dressing up and looking different than before... inside my head"why the f*ck couldn't she be like this when we were together?"...
Fast foward...
I got to know the girl at work and turned she had a boyfriend and they fought as well. We somehow got together and now we have been together for 8 months now. She's currently in her native country visiting for a month. It's been 2 weeks and i'm alone and made me think about her and my ex and about my future. I'm mid 20's and not getting younger.
I tried to weigh the pros and cons for my ex and my current one...
EX:22
PROS
-smart as hell. gpa 3. something high
-family oriented
-works hard
-knows how to do taxes, write checks and all that stuff.
-helps her parents bought a house
CONS
-needy, always want to see me. always call and text. if i dont text or call first she gets mad.
-clingy, always want to take her out or me come out. doesn't let me have my own space.
-jealous, always get mad and think im doing something bad if i dont pick up the phone...
-doesnt take care of herself after being with me for 2 years. sometimes i tell her to chew some gum or tell her to take care of her nails and shave. she then gets mad and flips out on me. i get mad inside talking to myself" if u dont f*cking take care of yourself now, what makes me think u gonna turn into a f*t b*tch when we married and have kids?"
this went on for a while where i sometimes had to run and pick up my phone and answer before she gets mad.. i eventually got tired and flipped out and swear at her and said "who the f**k are you that i gotta run and answer your call asap? u need to f*cking learn to trust me and stop being like this or i'll leave your a**". She cried and said shes sorry and later on, she went back to being her old self so i cheated on her...
CURRENT GIRL:29
PROS
-moved here from another country for several years now. just got her green card.
-works hard but doesnt have ged, working on it.
-guys hate when she walks with me in public. they look and talk sh*t. saying why she's with me.
-doesnt fight with me. always do as i say and go w/e i want to go. only gets mad when i talk about other girls or happen to look accidently.
CONS
-getting old and seems like she wants to have a family
-doesnt have ged so its hard to get a better job.
-my family doesn't like her, eventhough they havent seen her, just knowing that i left my ex for her, she they hate her...
-has only 10 yrs left until she loses her looks...
I'm here by myself and just thinking about my future and I have come to conclusion that my ex provides me a better future than my current one. But on the other hand, I don't want to msg her and beg or all that sh*t. I don't do that. If i don't do that then i dont know how else I will get her back. inside my head thats what i need to do but my pride says i refuse to do that. im thinking of just hanging in there for another 2 weeks until my current comes home and bust a bunch of load for a while and leave her or tell her i want to break up and let her go back to her ex. either way, shes going to cry...
I don't know what to do guys. please help. outside im fine, but inside i feel like im getting old and it feels like the inside of body is turning into debris each day thinking about this...
P.S i have been told by friends that my ex has been dating someone else and been dressing up and looking different than before... inside my head"why the f*ck couldn't she be like this when we were together?"...