flowtheory
Master Don Juan
There has been mention of these terms in multiple threads I’ve read. Pursuing being the more optimal. Figured I’d ask the board to see what the definitions are and the differences.
"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Difference between pursuing and chasing
- Thread starter flowtheory
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Glassguy
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Pretty much sums it up.
Women do not necessarily play "hard to get". They do however shyte test and ensure that you respect them.
You can always identify if you're chasing by stopping any and all communication. She will either reach out and initiate or she will be gone.
Pursuing= Leading.
Chasing= trying to sell a woman with low interest on why she should date you or begging.
Anything more than me initiating more than half the time early on leads to me disappearing and pumping the brakes. She can start doing some work or its deuces.