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You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Difference between Confidence and arrogance.

black jesus

Don Juan
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Arrogance

backbreaker said:
that has nothing to do with confidence. that's objectivity.

I think what a lot of people here think is confidence is really self esteem. Self Esteem, Confidence, and arrogance are three very distinct things.

Self Esteem is your general opinion towards yourself. I think when people say "confidence" this is what they really are referring to.

Confidence is a specific belief in yourself to do specific task at hand. I have the confidence that I can make an A on this next test or make the girl in the corner over there laugh. Confidence can be derived from previous experience, or I can be derived from high self esteem. I have confidence I can run 1 mile on the treadmill becuase I do it 3 times a week. Or, even though I have never been married before, I am confident that my wife and I will have a long lasting, mutually benefiting marriage, because I have high self esteem about myself and my ability to keep her happy and I'm sure she feels the same way.

Arrogance is the belief that you can do a task or something, better than someone else can do such task, or that you possess something that other people don't have or have something in more abundance than someone or some people have. Because no person on earth is what you would call "overall arrogant". I doubt bill gates thinks he can hang with me in the gym, when taken out of his element his arrogance is gone. But in his element I'm quite sure Bill gates is pretty arrogant. When put in a point blank phrase such as that, it takes alot of the societal stigmas out of the word arrogant. I believe when I walk into a club (when I was single) I was the best catch there, or a bar or whatever, or the best looking or had the most going for me, despite who else was there. "That may or may not be true, but that's how I felt. When I make my horse racing bets, I generally feel like I know what I am doing more than about 97-98% of the people wagering, and in both cases, the results I would get when i talked to women and at the horse track back up my feelings.

What the OP is calling arrogance is a defense mechanism people use when they feel inferior. I.E girls will call me arrogant because I think I'm too good for them, because I won't talk to them (When I was single). "you are so damn arrogant,l you think you are the **** don't you". See, in that situation, actually SHE THINKS I'm the ****, and instead of acknowledging the fact that I am in fact, the ****, she wants to get out of the exchange with her ego in place, by shaming me or making me feel bad because I won't talk her even though she made it apparent that she wants to talk to me. This and the "are you gay" response go hand and hand. And usually she's right. I do think I can do better because I am better than what I think she deserves.

Do not believe for a second women are turned off by true arrogance. In fact it's the exact opposite. If I actually think I'm better than anyone else in the room and more of a catch tan the woman looking at me...

let me put it this way. this is the difference between girls and boys.

a boy, if he sees a girl who he thinks is ass licking hot, has guys all around her, and she feels confident about herself and knows her value, will try to "prove himself" in some way, shape or form. This doesn't necessarily mean go AFC (though it usually does) but he will try to show her that he's value as well in some way. either by gaming her, or white knighting, whatever he thinks is going to build him UP he will do

a girl, even my wife, will try to bring you DOWN to her level ,whatever she thinks that is. Ergo "god you are so arrogant, you think you are the **** because all these girls like you don't you". Men and women take 2 different routes to get what they want.

When a woman calls you arrogant, it's really a backhanded compliment because it's not true arrogance. It's really her just saying you are better than me and I like you. It's really a woman going AFC.

want me to prove my point? easy. when is the last time you or anyone else called a woman arrogant? I rest my case.

Any man who outwardly calls another man arrogant I just classify as an AFC. he's using women's tactics to try to feel better about himself.

When put in those terms, everyone here has a tad bit of arrogance to them, just some more than others.
i couldnt agree more to what u just said
 

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Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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