"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

did I do the right thing-possible flake

napoleon

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2003
Messages
436
Reaction score
0
Location
Aitaorc
I set up a date with a girl I've known for about 1-2 years (we go to the same gym and small talk, maybe 10min in month total). She texts me the day before date and says she has the flu, could we go out another day. I said yes (I should have replied maybe), but I text her back this: OK, but YOU call ME. Get well quickly.

Now I'll wait for her to call and if she doesn't I'll pretend like noting happened.
I assume that if she canceled and is intrested she WILL call me. If not-NEXT.

Am I right?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

napoleon

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2003
Messages
436
Reaction score
0
Location
Aitaorc
Oh I forgot, after I told her to call ME, she told me -maybe we'll see eachother in the gym, although I wont go for a few days.
Now I started to trust my gut and my first thought and it's saying- She has the flu, will call me when she get's better, but will be OK to work out. Somethings fishy.


Should I try to call her 1 week after she canceled or wait her to call?


PS: I'm more pissed I deleted another girls number so she could give me hers than her flaking.:-(
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

napoleon

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2003
Messages
436
Reaction score
0
Location
Aitaorc
Roger, out.






Why ,OH why did I erase that HB's number, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!
 

napoleon

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2003
Messages
436
Reaction score
0
Location
Aitaorc
OH one more thing. How should I act when I see her. Like nothing happened, kid her , what??
 

napoleon

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2003
Messages
436
Reaction score
0
Location
Aitaorc
OK she called today(7 days after cancelling), seems like she really had the flu. Iwill tell her to hang out with me and if she tryes to reschedule I'll next her right then and there. For now she will be my backup plan. OK?
 

Warlord

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 1, 2006
Messages
264
Reaction score
0
Dude, relax. Don't jump to conclusions like many of the lamers in this thread.

It's Winter season, you know where temperature drops down and people start getting colds/coughs/flus/fevers/etc.

Cut her some slack, try again, the only time I would next is if she would verbally hint at not dating you or her body language was showing disinterest.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

napoleon

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2003
Messages
436
Reaction score
0
Location
Aitaorc
Seems my gut was right again.
She texts now I'm feeling ok so I can do things.
I say what things?
She says: oh now you want me to tell you that we can go to the cinema, I texted you no reason, just cause I said I will,here:I'm ok.
My reply was-Aha,no reason, OK glad youre feeling better.(and in my mind NEXT)
She didnt reply.
 

tosh

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 25, 2006
Messages
124
Reaction score
0
too many awkward games/messages.

Stop the texting. Call her, try to make plans directly. Clear the air.

If it still doesn't work, NEXT, but first call and sound confident and clear about what you want to do.

This is my advice.
 

Vulpine

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 18, 2006
Messages
2,514
Reaction score
134
Age
51
Location
The Castle Fox
You screwed up with:

What things?

You are supposed to be a man and take charge.

Your only recovery at this point would be:

Dinner at XXX restaurant xxx time xxx day. Pick you up at XXX?

No wishy-washiness. If she flakes, you did it to yourself... Next.
 

napoleon

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2003
Messages
436
Reaction score
0
Location
Aitaorc
I already HAD plans with her,time,place, activity(movie), and then she got sick.


OK I'll call her monday, and say friday, cinema, meet at xxx. If not, nice meeting you?
 

napoleon

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2003
Messages
436
Reaction score
0
Location
Aitaorc
Would waiting 4 days to CALL after these messages be too long?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Flyer

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 22, 2005
Messages
393
Reaction score
2
Location
Sydney
napoleon, u seem to be really anxious.. posting so frequently..
are you sure you didnt contract one-itis or something?

In the meantime. Go out with a wing, or solo... and get more numbers.
 

napoleon

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2003
Messages
436
Reaction score
0
Location
Aitaorc
I dont have a oneitis, I just wanna prove something to myself and am pissed. Maybe I could make a thread about what bothers me.
This is what bothers me: My friend goes out, makes out 1 time in last 6 months with a girl he sees for the first time, they go out, and now they are together, fuking and all.
I on the other hand can go out, make out with 2 girls, get 3 numbers, and from all that get nothing.
That is what pisses me off, like I have no luck. Now if I can go out with this girl (maybe I'll next her after 2-3 dates) I'll prove to myself that I'm not having bad luck, it's not my looks , just my technique.
 
Top